The Visit – Jin Mugwang's Discourse (辯) 2
Freedom, That Sensation of the Infinite
"The scent of ink is fine.
Have you no thought of studying again?"
Jin Mugwang's voice settled softly around the desk where he sat.
Sunlight filtering through the window came to rest upon his shoulder, casting a quiet glow.
Soun shook his head firmly.
"That is a path long past.
I do not believe it desirable for someone like me to become a magistrate."
It was a statement that went beyond humility.
There was a trace of self-lowering in it.
"Why?
Are those words meant to show modesty?"
Jin Mugwang asked, and Soun answered at once.
"No.
I have seen too much blood.
Living within battle has drawn me far from ordinary life.
A magistrate should stand at some distance from such things.
A man like me, whose first impulse is to cut by force, cannot speak of governing the people.
I believe such a role belongs to one untouched by the grime of the world."
He paused for breath and continued.
"And as I endured these events, I came to understand that the bureaucratic order I once desired was hollow.
What I write now is merely a pastime.
I have no intention of returning to office."
There was beauty in that candor.
His tone was even, without tremor.
The decision seemed long settled within him.
Jin Mugwang laughed brightly.
It was a smile seldom seen.
Warmth spread between the deep lines of his face.
"A most elegant pastime.
I too once wished to have such hours.
But the battlefield did not grant them."
His gaze drifted toward the window.
Sunlight brushed the side of his face like a passing regret.
"You may still have them now, General."
Soun's words were quiet, yet sincere.
Jin Mugwang smiled and shook his head.
"Even that has grown difficult.
They have ordered me to march again.
Her Majesty the Queen Dowager has summoned me.
Likely I am to prepare in autumn and block the enemy descending in winter.
I must go again.
To Haran."
He spoke calmly, as though explaining fate itself—
retracing a road long known.
"For men like us, it is enough to repel foreign foes and offer loyalty to the realm."
His voice lowered at the end.
At the clarity of his return to duty, Soun lowered his eyes and bowed.
"My congratulations…"
Soun bent deeply at the waist.
"Congratulations?
Nonsense."
Jin Mugwang waved his hand with a smile.
"I envy you instead—free as you are."
A sharp sensation pierced one side of Soun's chest.
The word freedom (自由) lingered, settling quietly within him.
Yes. I am free.
As the thought arose, it carried with it the vastness of floating alone upon an endless sea.
That boundless emptiness seemed to take form through the word freedom.
Yet within that sense of infinity lay another meaning.
It was less that nothing restrained him—
and more that there was nothing to lean upon.
It was standing upon open air with no place to brace oneself.
Since reaching Hwagyeong, this had been the strongest emotion.
A place bound to no one—
yet supported by no one.
Within that limitless freedom, he breathed air vast as the great sea (大海).
An immeasurable space filled both his inner self and the world beyond.
"Please withdraw those words.
I am still but a junior scholar attached to the First Squad of the White Dragon Unit."
"Boy, speak with some sense.
Would you have a master of Hwagyeong serve as a mere scout?"
"I can perform the duty well."
"I did not say you could not.
But fly farther, to broader skies and higher ground.
That is the path by which you will fulfill your dream."
Soun's expression turned serious.
His eyes grew clear and still.
"General.
The reason I remained in the capital to train was to learn how to live in this world.
To learn how a master of Hwagyeong might live as an ordinary man—
to live as they do.
I wish to remain a member of the White Dragon Unit.
If you return to Haran, then I too wish to go."
His voice was low, yet his resolve was unmistakable.
There was not the slightest wavering.
Jin Mugwang let out a low laugh.