When I first met Dorazora, my impression of her was that of a carefree and unserious girl. She brings happiness and cheers everywhere she goes. Always ready with a bright grin, a goofy comment, or some ridiculous excuse just to drag me to the cafeteria for extra-sweet treats. She felt like the kind of person who treated pressure like a plaything, wandering without a single thought in her head.
I used to think it was just a natural, bubbly personality. I figured some people were just built sunnier than the rest of us.
I've known her for more than a year. That's how she usually is.
Perhaps I didn't know her enough.
She's nobody special. She has her own struggle, just like everyone else. She's just too good at hiding it.
She's not the hero in stories; she doesn't have plot armor to protect her.
She has proven that the hardest part of winning isn't what you take from your opponents; it's what you tear out of yourself just to stay in the fight.
She is, in all senses, a greater person than I am.
There are 7 days left, including today, before the Kikuka Sho. I'm going to write in this diary for what might be my last 7 days in this world.
I don't know if this book will stay even if I disappeared; probably not. But writing this comforts me a little.
What will people do when they know they only have a week left to live?
I just hope I have enough time to say goodbye to everyone.
.
.
.
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
Dora shifted her attention from the newspaper she was reading towards the door. "Come in"
The hospital door swung open, revealing Astonishing holding a brightly wrapped gift basket overflowing with fresh fruit, sweet snacks, and a large plushie resting right in the center.
"Hey, Dora," Astonishing said, stepping into the room. "I brought some gifts, and treats from others. Thought you might be tired of hospital food"
Dora's face lit up instantly, "Aston-chan! Thank you so much!"
"The others will be happy to hear that too," Astonishing chuckled, setting the basket down on the bedside table.
Dora lifted the plushie from the basket. "This is me?"
Astonishing crossed her arms with a smirk. "That's right, they sold it to me for a discounted price. Just so you know, it hasn't even released publicly. It's a special edition! Also, an exclusive item, for now"
Dora squeezed the plushie. "To think I'd get my own special edition merchandise"
"I think you deserved it" Astonishing said, "Other than it brings them a lot of money, they also raised the royalty payment just for this special edition. After all... you're not going to race anymore..."
.....
Silence filled the room. For a moment, Astonishing regretted her words.
'Idiot', she berated herself inwardly
"...Well, that's unfortunate." Dora said, "But there's nothing I can do about it"
She lifted the plushie into eye-level.
"It is what it is," Dora continued, offering Astonishing a reassuring smile.
"...You really mean that?"
Dora glanced at her. "Of course!"
"Even if you never get to race again?"
The question lingered between them.
Dora looked down at the plushie in her hands. Its tiny stitched smile was so innocent, so blissfully unaware of the world it had been made to represent.
"...Yeah."
She rubbed its little head with her thumb. "I mean, sure, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't sad about it. There were days when I wondered if all that effort was worth it."
"But I kept going anyway," Dora continued. "Sometimes I hated it. Sometimes I wondered if I was just wasting my time."
She gave the plushie a small squeeze. "And sometimes, I wondered if I was being selfish."
Astonishing frowned. "Selfish? For what?"
"For wanting something I might never be able to have."
Dora's smile softened. "Everyone else could run so freely. Meanwhile, I had to accept that my body couldn't do what I wanted it to. Sometimes I wish I was just like Oguri Cap..."
"Then, for some reason, I started wondering what would happen if I stopped thinking about them"
"I don't even know how to explain it," She looked up at Astonishing. "For once, I just ran."
"After everything you've been through." Astonishing hesitated. "You're telling me that a few seconds of running freely made all of it worth it?"
"...I don't know if I'd say it made everything worth it." She looked down at her legs. "I wish I hadn't gotten hurt. I wish I could've celebrated with everyone without having to worry about what I'd done to myself."
Astonishing didn't know what to say.
She wanted to tell Dora that she would run again. That her injuries would heal, that the doctors would find a way, that everything would eventually work out.
But she couldn't promise any of those things.
"...But even if I can't," she continued, "I don't want to hate myself for trying. I spent so long being afraid of what would happen if I pushed myself too far. I kept imagining all the things I might lose."
Dora continued, "But I think that fear made me forget something important."
"What?"
"That there are things worth reaching for even when you're afraid." She hugged the plushie against her chest.
"I don't think being brave means you aren't scared. Maybe it just means that, sometimes, you decide something matters more than being scared."
Astonishing looked at her for a long moment.
"...When did you get so philosophical?"
Dora immediately straightened.
"Excuse me! I have always been a woman of profound wisdom."
Astonishing stared at her, then she sighed. "...There she is."
Dora gasped, "Huh?"
"I was worried you might have been replaced by someone else."
"Someone else?! Aston-chan, I assure you, there is only one Dorazora in this entire world! One and only!"
Astonishing laughed. And Dora laughed with her.
".....Next is your turn" She stared at Astonishing again. "The Kikuka Sho, right?"
Astonishing's laughter slowly faded, then she nodded. "...Yeah."
"...Does that scare you?"
Astonishing went silent for a moment. "More than ever"
"I'm sure you can do it! You are strong!" Dora tried to cheer her up. "This will be your lucky shot!"
Astonishing smiled faintly. "We've known each other for more than a year, there are still many things I hide from you. I found out about your secret that night, now... let me reveal mine--"
"--Dora, the truth is..."
.
.
.
"W...what?" Dora couldn't hide the shock on her face.
"I know how it sounds," Astonishing murmured, "It's ridiculous. But it's the truth."
"..... who else knew about this?"
"Just you and End"
"You didn't even tell your parents?"
"....." Astonishing lowered her head. "I don't have the courage"
Dora stared at her. "B-but, if you win... it's going to be fine, right?"
"I don't know", Astonishing lifted her head again. "I feel like... there's more to it; I just... don't know what it is"
"But if you didn't-"
"I'm afraid this is going to be my last seven days" Astonishing interjected. "After that, I'm going to disappear. Everything will be erased, the world will reset, except I will no longer be there- not this version of me, at least"
"You're going to... what?" Dora's voice wavered, "Disappear? Stop existing? Just like that? That doesn't make any sense! That's not something that just happens to people! You can't just... you can't just tell me something like that and expect me to believe it!"
"... I don't expect you to believe me. I just felt like you deserve to know"
"Why?"
"Because you're my best friend"
That words should have warmed her heart, brought a smile to her face, given her something to treasure on a day when everything seemed determined to fall apart.
Instead, they hurt.
"You have to try!" she suddenly spoke, making Astonishing jolt. "Y-you can't just lost hope! I'm here! I will support you! And I'm sure many people will too!"
"I'm trying!" Astonishing clenched her fists. "At first I felt confident, I've been training a lot, even I got to run alongside a top racer."
"I wanted to pretend everything was fine. I wanted to just keep training, keep running, and act like I had all the time in the world. But every time I looked at the time... every time I realized another day was slipping through my fingers... I felt like I was choking."
"Day by day, this uneasy feeling keeps on growing. It's scary, Dora. Knowing I might disappear... it terrifies me..."
Without a second thought, Dora reached out and pulled Astonishing into her arms.
It was awkward and clumsy, constrained by the heavy braces locking her knees in place, but she didn't care. She wrapped her arms tightly around Astonishing's shoulders, burying her face against her chest.
"D-dora..!"
"Quiet," Dora murmured.
Slowly, the stiff tension melted out of her shoulders. She stopped fighting the tremor in her hands, wrapped her arms around Dora's back, and buried her face against her shoulder.
"You're my best friend." Dora spoke again, "If this world is stupid enough to try and take you away, then I should just destroy everything myself"
When Astonishing finally pulled back, her eyes were red-rimmed, but the weight in her chest had lifted a little. She reached up, wiping her cheeks with the back of her sleeve.
"Okay," Astonishing whispered. "I will try, not like I had a choice."
Dora let out a small laugh. "Of course you have a choice, silly. You can choose to keep trying. And I'll be right here, cheering you on."
Astonishing looked at her for a moment. "...Even if I don't know what I'm trying to fight against?"
"Especially then."
There was something strangely comforting about the way she said it.
"I really appreciate your support, but... I still need to find out what exactly is I'm supposed to do"
Dora holds her chin. "Surely there must be some hints, right?"
"Hints?" Astonishing repeated.
"With how absurd your dreams were, surely it's not hard to remember, right? Take a moment, what do you remember?"
Astonishing went silent, her gaze drifting toward the faint sunlight streaming through the hospital window. She closed her eyes, letting her mind travel back through the hazy, fragmented memories of her dreams.
.
.
.
"There is a state where the perception of the self completely dissolves. A place where the noise, the fear, and sometimes even the signals of pain from your own muscles are utterly muted. The world slows down. Your body becomes nothing but a perfectly optimized instrument of absolute intent. It is...
.
.
.
"Zone..."
Dora blinked. "...Zone?"
Now that she thought about it, she remembers that towards the end of the race, Dora looks... different. Not just the look, her aura is different; it's like... she transformed into something entirely new. After that, her performance skyrocketed.
It wasn't simply that she had accelerated. Dora seemed to see something the others couldn't.
'Could it be... Dora had entered the Zone?'
Astonishing looked back at her.
"During your race. Near the end, you suddenly started moving differently. I remember watching you from the stands. You were... different"
Dora tilted her head. "Well... I did feel different. I somehow can see openings before they appeared. It's like everything happens just for me"
"What exactly do you see, Dora?"
"I--"
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
"May I come in?"
That voice sounds familiar.
"Um, please come in!" Dora said.
A familiar figure stepped into the room. It was none other than the student council president herself.
"Pardon the intrusion," Rudolf said, "I hope I am not interrupting an important conversation.
Dora straightened herself. "P-President! N-No, not at all! We were just chatting a little bit!"
"P-President!" Astonishing was also surprised by her visit.
Rudolf carried a small, elegantly wrapped box. She placed it neatly on the bedside table beside the basket. "I came to bring a small token of encouragement on behalf of the council. Though it appears you are already well-supplied"
Dora rubs the back of her neck. "Ah, well... Aston-chan brought it..."
"I see, it is good to see you in high spirits," she said.
"Thank you, President! I'm doing great, really! The doctors say I'll be back on my feet! Well, off the track, but definitely walking!"
Rudolf nodded in acknowledgement. "And you, Astonishing, isn't it? Kikuka Sho is only a few days away. I hope you are ready for it"
Astonishing nodded. "I'm doing my best. There's still a lot I need to work on before the race."
"That is understandable." she simply replied.
Rudolf looks back at Dora. "I wish we can talk more, but I wouldn't want to keep you from your visitor any longer."
"Oh, it's no trouble at all, President! You can stay as long as you like!" Dora said.
"That is kind of you, but I have other responsibilities waiting for me.--"
"--And you, Astonishing. Take care of yourself as well. The Kikuka Sho is approaching, so make sure you are getting enough rest alongside your training."
"I will. Thank you for coming, President."
Rudolf nodded, "If there's a problem, you can always consult me. Of course, there's something I can't tell you, otherwise it will give you too much of an advantage"
Rudolf turned toward the door, preparing to leave.
"Well then, I shall take my leave. Do get some rest, Dorazora."
Rudolf had just reached for the door handle when Astonishing stopped her.
"Um... President Rudolf?"
She turned around. "Yes?"
Astonishing hesitated. She glanced briefly at Dora, who was watching her with curiosity, before looking back at Rudolf.
"...Can I ask you something?"
"Certainly. What is it?"
"Have you ever heard of something called the Zone?"
Rudolf's face darkened.