Shen Liuzhen had pushed Xie Yu away from the charging horses, and Xie Yu hadn't been able to save her from that lash of the whip.
In Xie Yu's mind, countless thoughts surged in an instant.
But the very first thing she did in the physical world was look closely at the rider's face.
Skin darkened red-black by wind and sun, thick brows and large eyes, tall, broad-shouldered, powerfully built but not well-proportioned. Her hands bore calluses from long years of riding, and she wore high-quality leather boots.
Unlikely to be someone from the southern naval forces.
The rider raised her whip again.
Xie Yu grabbed a long wooden pole from the side of the street.
The whip sliced through the air with a sharp crack and slammed violently into the wooden pole.
The pole blocked the whip, twisted, then came down hard on the rider's hand. The rider cried out in pain and reflexively let go.
Xie Yu pulled the pole back, gathered strength again, and swung it—smashing straight into the rider's chest and knocking her clean off the horse.
The rider's companions immediately moved to attack.
Xie Yu struck the horses' knees with the pole. The horses cried out in pain and dropped to their forelegs.
The companions lost their balance and were knocked off one by one. Xie Yu followed up with the pole, disabling each of them. They lay on the ground, writhing, temporarily unable to move.
Xie Yu withdrew the bloodstained pole and turned around.
Shen Liuzhen's tears covered most of her face.
"You suspected me of staging this myself just now, didn't you?"
Xie Yu's hand—reaching out to pull her up from the ground—froze midair.
Shen Liuzhen cried as she spoke angrily, "The first thing you did was check whether those people were from the southern navy. You thought I arranged for them to crash into me, whip me, destroy my face—just so I could use saving you as leverage."
She wiped her tears forcefully. Tears mixed with blood, smearing her face red.
Bracing herself against the filthy ground, she stood up. Her eyes burned bright with anger, like a blade of grass set alight.
"Why would you think that of me?"
She was weak, her skin still bloodless. Her white clothes were expensive. She was skilled at performance—gentle and elegant.
Yet she shouted as if she had suffered the greatest betrayal in the world.
"Why would you think that of me?!"
"Have I ever done anything bad to you? Why?!"
The crowd pressed in around them, watching the scene unfold. Shen Liuzhen didn't care about dignity at all—she stubbornly demanded an answer.
Xie Yu said nothing.
She grabbed Shen Liuzhen's hand, pulled her out of the crowd, and pushed her into the carriage waiting by the street—the same one they had arrived in.
She sat down beside the driver. "Go back to the residence."
Seeing Xie Yu's dark expression and total lack of a smile, the driver didn't dare say a word and quickly whipped the reins.
They returned to the residence in haste. The household staff were shocked—they had barely been gone before coming back.
When the steward saw Shen Liuzhen step down from the carriage, her face covered in blood, she immediately panicked.
A guest being injured like this—what was to be done?
"Prepare a room for her. Go find the best physician in the city. Also send someone to the palace to summon an imperial physician and have her bring scar-removal ointment."
Xie Yu issued the orders without expression.
"I'm not being treated here! I'm going back!" Shen Liuzhen shouted.
"Send me back! You hate me! I don't want to be with you!"
She turned to leave, but Xie Yu grabbed her hand, dragged her back, shoved her into the courtyard, and ordered the guards at the gate to close it.
"Be good. The imperial physician will see you soon." Xie Yu's voice was very low.
As soon as she finished speaking, Shen Changyin emerged from the front hall, a book still in her hand.
She had clearly heard everything.
Xie Yu nodded to her. "We ran into people riding horses recklessly in the market. She was knocked over and then cut on the face by a whip."
Shen Changyin's expression was unreadable. She didn't speak.
Shen Liuzhen let out a cold laugh. "Why don't you tell her how I got hit? How my face was ruined by that whip?"
"If it weren't for saving you, would I be like this?!"
Her words struck heavily, each one like a bead crashing to the ground and bouncing back up.
Shen Changyin tightened her grip on the book, observing everything before her.
Shen Liuzhen's pale face contrasted starkly with the vivid blood. Her expression was lively—even her anger was enough to stir pity.
Xie Yu remained silent, expressionless. Her amber eyes were shadowed by her brow, dark and inscrutable.
Her hands were smeared with a mixture of blood and tears—likely from stopping Shen Liuzhen from wiping her wound.
"Come inside first," Shen Changyin said calmly. "Let the maids tend to the injury."
Shen Liuzhen shouted, "I already said I don't want you treating me! Send me back!"
Shen Changyin said, "It should be dealt with early, to prevent it from festering—"
Before she could finish speaking, Xie Yu grabbed Shen Liuzhen and dragged her straight into the main hall, pressing her down onto a chair.
She sat down beside her, staring at Shen Liuzhen with a dark, oppressive gaze. "Behave yourself."
Shen Changyin stood at the doorway, watching them.
Xie Yu had just passed by her, yet hadn't spared her a single extra glance, as if the only thing left in this world that mattered was Shen Liuzhen.
Her eyelashes trembled. Shen Changyin closed her eyes briefly, telling herself she was overthinking it.
The maids quickly brought out the household's usual ointment and began simple treatment for Shen Liuzhen.
The pain from applying the medicine was intense. As the ointment was applied, Shen Liuzhen kept dodging, tears flowing even harder, all while continuing to curse Xie Yu.
"I hate you! You doubted me! And now you're making me hurt!"
Xie Yu watched quietly, like a scarecrow, letting her curse and scold without offering any response.
Only when Shen Liuzhen, trying to avoid the medicine, tugged at the wound and made it bleed even more did Xie Yu finally say to the maid, "Be gentler."
Shen Changyin suddenly felt a chill creep over her body.
She glanced into the courtyard. The tree shade was deep green, the sunlight bright—clearly already summer.
Xie Yu and Shen Liuzhen had been alone together for less than half an hour. How had things suddenly turned into this?
Shen Liuzhen's words echoed unexpectedly in her mind.
She had said she always kept a tight hold on Xie Yu, because she knew that if there were other choices, Xie Yu would never choose her.
She had said the only reason she could be with Xie Yu was because she forcibly occupied most of Xie Yu's time, cutting off any chance for Xie Yu to develop relationships with others.
Shen Changyin's heartbeat gradually slowed, yet every beat felt like a heavy drum striking bone, bringing a dull ache.
Those words no longer seemed so absurd.
Shen Changyin went to the main seat and sat down, watching quietly.
Xie Yu finally couldn't endure it anymore. She pressed down on Shen Liuzhen's shoulder and told the maid to apply the medicine. "Behave yourself."
After the medicine was applied, the physician summoned from the streets and the imperial doctor from the palace arrived soon after.
Not long later, Shen Liuzhen's mother, General Shen, also arrived. She seemed to have rushed over in the middle of official duties, bringing a group of subordinates with her.
The empress had also heard about the incident and sent her personal attendant, along with many medicinal supplies.
When Shen Liuzhen saw her mother, the tears she had just managed to stop immediately started falling again, streaming down over the freshly treated wound.
Xie Yu rubbed her brow. "No crying. The medicine was just applied."
Her mood seemed especially bad because of Shen Liuzhen's injury, and her tone wasn't gentle. Her words startled Shen Liuzhen badly.
Shen Liuzhen hiccupped, sobbing softly, and forcibly swallowed her tears, not daring to cry anymore.
General Shen let out a cold laugh. "May I ask in what capacity the Third Highness is restraining my daughter?"
"My daughter's injury—wasn't it caused because of the Third Highness? Such a large wound—does the Third Highness not need to take responsibility?"
Xie Yu said nothing, letting her speak.
Shen Changyin leaned back in her chair. Her index finger had been tapping lightly and soundlessly against the armrest the whole time.
She waited a moment, then decided to speak. "General Shen, the situation isn't clear yet. The Third Highness didn't push your daughter out either. Placing blame like this isn't appropriate, is it?"
Xie Yu lifted her head and glanced at her, then quickly looked away again.
General Shen froze for a moment. After a long pause, she said stiffly, "Very well. Then I'll wait for the day when the truth comes to light. When that time comes, we'll divide responsibility properly. Right and wrong will reveal themselves."
"See you out."
Shen Changyin watched as General Shen took Shen Liuzhen away. The main hall was left with only herself and Xie Yu. Beneath the candlelight, both of their shadows were faint.
Shen Changyin pretended to be relaxed. "Are you alright?"
Xie Yu sat there blankly, her reactions a bit slow. "Ah… I'm fine. I'm okay."
"How did she end up saving you?" Shen Changyin sat down across from Xie Yu, trying to meet her eyes.
But Xie Yu's gaze stayed lowered. "I don't know. I actually didn't need her to save me."
"Did the people who rode wildly today show anything suspicious? Can their background be identified?"
At this point, Xie Yu looked up and met her gaze.
Shen Changyin suspected Shen Liuzhen—suspected that today's incident had been staged by her.
Xie Yu knew of her suspicion.
But she didn't respond. She gave no answer.
Shen Changyin narrowed her eyes slightly. Her expression shifted, the curve of her lips flattening as the false gentleness instantly faded.
"What do you think of her?"
"She's… fine."
"Then it looked like you treated her quite well today."
"I treat everyone like that. There's nothing strange about it."
Shen Changyin said, "But you're strange with me."
Xie Yu looked toward the courtyard, at a cluster of deep green leaves gently swaying at the top of the tree.
She stopped answering.
Shen Changyin felt her heart sink, section by section. Still, she maintained her composure, deliberately keeping her voice gentle as she continued asking.
"Why don't you want to look at me?"
Xie Yu turned her head back. "It's not that I don't want to look at you."
"Are you angry with me?"
Xie Yu paused. "No."
"But there's anger in your heart."
"No." Xie Yu's voice grew lighter and lighter, like a tiny spark at the tip of a fuse.
"Then why won't you look at me?" Shen Changyin pressed step by step.
"You were out with her for less than an hour. Has your heart already wavered?"
Xie Yu's hand trembled slightly.
"Are you really such an unsteady person?"
"She got angry, and now you won't even look at me. Are you punishing me?"
Xie Yu clenched her teeth, the muscles in her face taut.
"You want to betray me. You regret it. You let her beauty blind your reason, so much that you couldn't even see such an obvious scheme, right?"
"You don't like me at all."
Xie Yu shouted, "That's not true!"
"I wasn't blinded by her! I saw it! I started suspecting her the moment she saved me!" She faced Shen Changyin directly, her voice growing louder and louder.
"Then who is this strange behavior of yours meant for?" Shen Changyin's chest also filled with an inexplicable anger, her voice rising.
Xie Yu fell silent, instantly retreating. After a moment, still looking into Shen Changyin's eyes, she said softly,
"I hate you a little."
Shen Changyin even laughed, her smile icy. "Hate me?"
Xie Yu said, "Today, the very first thing I did when she was injured was to investigate whether she had staged it herself."
"But those riders clearly came from the northwest, not from the southern naval forces, which greatly reduced her suspicion."
Shen Changyin said coldly, "What exactly are you trying to say?"
"When I realized they weren't from the southern naval forces, do you know what I was thinking?"
"I was very disappointed."
"I was thinking—if only they had come from the southern naval forces. If only I could immediately confirm that Shen Liuzhen had staged it herself. I didn't want to bear any responsibility toward her. I didn't want to give anyone any reason to tie her to me."
"I only wanted to be entangled with you."
"I suspected her. I used the most vicious thoughts to judge her."
Xie Yu's breathing grew rapid, as if she couldn't catch her breath. "She pointed out, on the spot, that I was suspecting her."
"At that moment, I suddenly realized—I shouldn't be this kind of person."
Xie Yu took deep breaths. "I shouldn't be like this. I should be a little kinder, shouldn't I? If someone saved me, I should bravely take responsibility."
"I shouldn't speculate about others like that without any evidence."
"And I shouldn't feel disappointed when I discover that someone is innocent."
Her amber-colored eyes suddenly began to shimmer—tears were welling up.
Someone who had nearly died in a flash flood, who had been injured so badly that one leg was almost ruined, and yet hadn't shed a single tear—was now crying in a moment without pain or disaster.
Shen Changyin's heart nearly stopped.
Xie Yu was still looking at her. "Do you know that when I have no selfish desires, I'm actually the most ignorant—and the happiest?"
"I hate you a little, because you made me stop being myself."
"I hate you even more—and the reason I don't dare look at you—is because I'm afraid you'll stop liking me because of this."
Xie Yu wanted to smile, but the moment her lips moved, tears poured down, so she stopped trying.
She just looked at Shen Changyin and said sadly, "What is it that you like about me?"
"I once secretly felt proud, thinking that you must like me because I'm righteous, brave, and kind."
"Of course you would. These three qualities are as clear as crystal. Everyone likes such people. Everyone teaches us to become such people."
Righteousness, bravery, and kindness are not innate. They require constant effort to maintain.
"Before I met you, I worked very hard to be that kind of person."
"After discovering that you liked me, I wasn't even surprised, because I thought it was what I deserved for holding to my principles."
"If a piece of crystal works so hard to remain beautiful, then that crystal deserves your affection."
Even with her face stiff, the tears finally rolled down, large and heavy.
Xie Yu clumsily wiped at her eyes with her forearm. Tear tracks smeared across her face—messy, awkward, completely inelegant, not pretty at all.
"But you made me feel worse."
"Your liking made me feel worse. And when you eventually discover that I've become this kind of person, you'll stop liking me."
"So… I hate you a little."
Shen Changyin pressed a hand to her chest as her heartbeat slowly returned to normal—this organ had nearly shut down from the pain of Xie Yu's tears just moments ago.
Her eyes grew sore and swollen.
The newest thought in her mind was unexpectedly—
Little Xie… how could she, even when angry, only say she "hates a little"?
Little Xie—how could she be so childish and yet so heartbreakingly lovable? She was already an adult. How could an adult's world still revolve around things like "righteousness, bravery, and kindness"?
She didn't respond for a long time. Xie Yu stiffened stubbornly.
"Say whatever you want to say. You don't need to tiptoe around my feelings. If you want to break up, that's up to you."
Shen Changyin pulled her into a deep embrace.
"I'm not going anywhere."
She spoke softly by her ear. "Do you remember the note you once wrote for me?"
"I will never, ever, ever leave you."
—
T/N: If you're enjoying this translation, feel free to check out my Patreon. If you're unable to support financially, you can still subscribe for free and receive chapters two hours earlier, along with updates and announcements. Paid tiers offer early access and daily chapters.
Thank you so much for reading!
patreon.com/Baenz
