"Wait!"
What else could she say? Granny Chiyo hurriedly waved her hands, slamming the brakes on their unhinged discussion.
"What right do the lot of you have to decide where this old woman goes? Shouldn't I be the one choosing my own vacation destination?!" Granny Chiyo quickly seized back the initiative.
She absolutely refused to get shipped off to Kumogakure just to experience the horrific-sounding Lightning Oppression Horizontal Chiyo Dance.
"That's true."
"Then Chiyo, where exactly are you planning to go? Don't tell us you're crawling right back to Sunagakure."
"That could actually work too. We can just think of a way to lure Madara out of the village."
"Kirigakure."
"?"
"Kirigakure," Granny Chiyo repeated firmly.
"Huh?" Gengetsu Hōzuki blinked, completely baffled.
He was literally the only guy present who hadn't actively tried to recruit her.
Why the hell was he getting dragged into this?
"I heard Kirigakure has been developing quite nicely lately and even launched a new seaside tourism industry. I never actually got a chance to wear the swimsuit I bought last time, so this is absolutely perfect. I'll go enjoy the sun and the beach." Granny Chiyo smiled coyly.
"Huh? Swimsuit?!"
Hearing her reasoning, every single man present instinctively pictured Granny Chiyo's shriveled body stuffed into a modern swimsuit.
A collective, violent shudder rippled through the crowd.
'Too terrifying!'
"Um, if I remember correctly, your Land of Wind also possesses a coastline, right? Why don't you just avoid Sunagakure and post up at your own country's seaside beach instead? It's basically the exact same thing!" Gengetsu desperately scrambled for any excuse to reject her.
Forget the hassle of personally escorting her all the way to Kirigakure.
Even if he didn't have to carry her bags, there was a glaring, village-ending problem.
Kirigakure's fragile tourism industry had only just started gaining traction, and foot traffic was still low.
If Granny Chiyo sprawled out on their pristine sands in a two-piece, she would command the horrified attention of every single tourist present, inflicting catastrophic AOE mental damage on the entire crowd.
Once word of that traumatic sight spread, how the hell was Kirigakure's tourism industry supposed to survive?!
"You know... you're absolutely right."
Hearing Gengetsu's suggestion, Granny Chiyo froze.
She tapped her chin, pondering it carefully for a few seconds before nodding with dead-serious conviction.
'Phew—'
Gengetsu exhaled a massive sigh of relief.
"How did I not think of that?! Our Land of Wind can absolutely develop its own tourism industry! Well, that just gives me an even bigger reason to visit the Land of Water. I need to personally inspect your infrastructure, experience the amenities while taking detailed notes, and reverse-engineer your business model!"
Granny Chiyo puffed out her chest, feeling the heavy burden of leadership press down on her shoulders
. She truly worried herself sick over Sunagakure's future.
She was ready to grind until her dying breath. For the sake of Sunagakure's economic development, she would selflessly endure the scorching sun, the abrasive sand, and the chilly seawater.
Even at her fragile age, she would heroically force herself to eat premium seafood—which could easily trigger her gout and leave her terribly uncomfortable.
'Sigh. I really am far too great,' she thought, deeply moved by her own sacrifice.
"..."
"Then we'll leave it to you, Second Mizukage."
"Granny Chiyo is safely in your hands."
"You two stay here and don't wander off. We'll go fetch the Flying Raijin squad and warp you straight to Kirigakure. Definitely do not return to Sunagakure right now, just in case Uchiha Madara sniffs out that something is wrong."
With the crowd rapidly chiming in one after another, the matter was aggressively settled.
Gengetsu opened his mouth to protest, but having completely run out of valid excuses, he could only accept his cruel fate in helpless silence.
And so, Jiraiya and Gengetsu stayed behind as bodyguards.
Rōshi and Sarutobi Hiruzen drew the chore of sprinting back to the village to hail the teleportation taxi.
They deliberately left Jiraiya behind because, at the end of the day, they still didn't entirely trust Gengetsu.
After all, the guy hadn't shown a shred of enthusiasm when they drafted the plan to sabotage Uchiha Madara.
Leaving a second guard was just basic tactical insurance.
Sarutobi Hiruzen and Rōshi quickly arrived at the Flying Raijin squad's designated staging area.
By sheer, unadulterated coincidence, Uchiha Madara and Ōnoki had just wrapped up their deep-dive intel session on Obito and happened to stroll into the exact same clearing.
The second the two factions locked eyes, the atmosphere thickened into crushing, suffocating awkwardness.
Ōnoki was currently prepping to haul Uchiha Madara back to Amegakure and dump him directly into the First Hokage's lap.
He fully intended to lay out the intel, orchestrate a global strike team to crush Uchiha Obito, and simultaneously keep Madara's own insidious schemes in check.
"Ōnoki! I knew you old bastard couldn't be trusted! Are you planning to take... Wait, where the hell are you going with Madara?!" Rōshi exploded, pointing a trembling finger.
"I knew it! You have absolutely no shame! The second you realized you couldn't successfully woo Chiyo, you immediately pivoted and decided to elope with Uchiha Madara instead, didn't you?! Can you even look us in the eye?! How do you face the trust the First Hokage placed in you?! You stumpy winter melon! You useless piece of trash! You mud-playing dwarf!"
Rōshi unleashed a merciless, torrential barrage of insults straight at Ōnoki's face.
"Rōshi, shut your mouth and stop spouting utter garbage!" Ōnoki barked, forcibly swallowing his blazing irritation to deliver a tense explanation.
"Someone ambushed Madara with a genjutsu earlier and extracted highly classified intelligence straight from his brain. The entire shinobi world is now in critical danger! I have to drag him to Amegakure, hand him over to the First Hokage, and brief them on what just went down here..."
"Someone used a genjutsu on Madara?" Rōshi and Sarutobi Hiruzen exchanged a highly skeptical glance.
"Ōnoki, don't tell me you cast a genjutsu on Madara yourself, ripped the secrets out of his head, and then conveniently jumped out to dispel it just to play the hero?" Rōshi sneered with thick sarcasm.
"If I hurled insults at you like that on any normal day, you would have immediately cursed me back into the dirt. The fact that you actually swallowed your pride and explained yourself completely proves you have a guilty conscience, doesn't it?!"
"...Rōshi, I have tolerated your insolence for far too long!" Ōnoki finally snapped, his fury boiling over.
He floated up into the air, jabbing his stubby finger right at Rōshi's nose.
"Fine, play it that way! Let me ask you a question: where the hell is Chiyo?! Where is the woman Danzo boldly kidnapped right in front of us?! Did you greedy bastards stash her away for yourselves, or were you just too pathetic to catch up to him?! Why did you return completely empty-handed?!
And why is this fossil, the Third Hokage, suddenly standing here?! Where the hell is everyone else?! Did you betray Iwagakure, Rōshi?! Did you collude with Konoha, team up with this damn monkey and that treacherous snake Danzo, and sell out Chiyo and the Second Mizukage to the highest bidder?!"
Hearing those explosive accusations, Uchiha Madara's sharp gaze instantly locked onto Rōshi.
Sabotaging Obito was absolutely his top priority right now, but at the end of the day, Granny Chiyo's One's Own Life Reincarnation remained his golden ticket to true resurrection.
He had to guarantee she wasn't snatched away by a rival faction.
It would be an absolute disaster if he exhausted all his resources crushing Obito, only to turn around and discover Granny Chiyo had already wasted her one-and-only cast on someone else.
Rōshi was completely stun-locked by the aggressive scolding.
The main problem was that during their sprint over here, they genuinely hadn't brainstormed a cover story for the "Danzo kidnapping Chiyo" incident that would hold up in front of Madara.
They never in a million years expected to bump into the Uchiha ghost at this exact drop point by sheer coincidence.
"Well, Rōshi?! Why aren't you cursing me back?! Are you suddenly feeling guilty because you actually did something treasonous?! Huh?!" Seeing Rōshi silence, Ōnoki mercilessly pressed the attack, hurling Rōshi's exact words right back into his face.
"Third Tsuchikage, please calm down. Do not get so worked up." As the two Iwa shinobi barked at each other, Sarutobi Hiruzen's brain spun at Mach speed, rapidly weaving a semi-believable cover story.
"As for Danzo, I have personally cleaned house and dealt with the traitor. Granny Chiyo has also been successfully rescued. It's just..."
Hiruzen paused, adopting a deeply sorrowful expression.
"It's just that Granny Chiyo suffered far too much psychological shock during the chaotic rescue operation and, tragically, lost her memory. We decided to secretly escort her to a peaceful seaside resort in the Land of Water.
We want to let her relax on the gentle beaches for a while, just to see if the tranquil environment can help restore her shattered mind."
---------
Read 40 chapters ahead and support me on patreon.
patreon (.)com/Newbietranslator