"Hinata, Shino, defend yourselves!"
Kiba's voice reached their ears as he unleashed a ultra forbidden jutsu, Fang Over Fang.
At that moment, Kiba resembled a classic gaming meme: Quick, dodge! I pressed the wrong button!
Still, Kiba was smart to shout a warning before launching his jutsu.
Without it, Hinata and Shino might not have reacted in time.
Hinata and Shino instinctively raised their arms to block, deflecting the brunt of the impact.
The force sent them flying backward, narrowly avoiding the cascading white liquid.
It was lucky Hinata hadn't mastered the Eight Trigrams Palm Rotation yet.
Otherwise, she would have used it on reflex, sending the well-meaning Kiba hurtling back to enjoy a sticky facial.
Speaking of which, on a certain websites, Kiba and Naruto are a surprisingly popular and... unconventional pairing.
In any case, Kiba's quick reflexes saved the trio from a highly questionable fate.
"Kiba, what's going on? Why did you attack us?" Hinata asked, sitting on the dirt and rubbing her sore arm.
"Hinata, Kiba wouldn't use Ninjutsu without a reason. He must have been trying to push us out of the way—wait what's that?" Shino adjusted his sunglasses, calmly analyzing the situation, when he noticed the rain of white fluid and shattered glass crashing to the ground.
Splat! Crash!
"So that's what it was. Thanks, Kiba." Shino nodded before walking forward, tilting his head to gaze at the sky.
"Strange... where did this even come from?"
...
Inside Kakashi's room:
Hearing the "Fang Over Fang" shout from the street, the Masked Man thought he'd been exposed.
He had already drawn two black rods, ready to make dog meat hotpot for dinner.
But after waiting for a tense minute, he heard two pained cries from below instead.
Realizing the misunderstanding, the Masked Man scoffed and vanished using Kamui.
During his trip to Konoha, the Masked Man confirmed that Kakashi had finally dumped the filth from the Kamui Dimension.
His intangibility was working again!
However, Kakashi's cleanup was garbage, leaving a lingering stench in the pocket dimension.
The pit the Masked Man had dug in the Kamui Dimension and converted into a private hot spring... was now ruined!
'Using another man's dimension like a public toilet, huh?' The Masked Man glumly retrieved the mop, broom, and bucket he'd prepared earlier and began scrubbing the Kamui blocks.
The sad scene resembled Naruto's infamous prank cleanup when he scrubbed the Hokage Rock.
The main difference was that Naruto had cleaned up his own mess.
Why was Kakashi playing with literal shit while Obito had to play janitor?
Even now, he couldn't figure out what the hell Kakashi was plotting.
'Could it be...?'
The Masked Man recalled a cursed ninjutsu he had "accidentally" developed earlier—Brown Wave Wild Dance, derived from his Fire Release.
He had once used this technique to eradicate everything in the Kamui Dimension and leave several bandits dead with their eyes wide open in disbelief.
'Could Kakashi have developed a similar application of Kamui?' The Masked Man remembered Madara's cryptic words, 'The Sharingan's true power can only be unleashed when both eyes are used together.'
'If Kakashi used Kamui to release Fire Release while I used it to release... Toad Oil, wouldn't that...?'
"No! Why am I even considering a combo attack with Kakashi? What the hell am I thinking?"
"I must achieve the Infinite Tsukuyomi, and Kakashi cannot die. That bastard Kakashi, if he goes to the Pure Land.... he will inevitably rizz up Rin..."
The Masked Man had once again found a pathetic excuse to protect Kakashi's life.
"Kakashi has too much aura and he's indiscriminate."
"If he dies and goes to the Pure Land, what if he targets Rin?"
"Then we'll be separated by the realms of the living and the dead."
"Even as a cuckold in the living world, at least I can still see her."
"At least a cuck can still watch."
...
Konoha.
"Don't go near it! That's not milk! Akamaru says the scent is familiar—it's Naruto's!"
Kiba stopped Shino from approaching the highly suspicious puddle.
"Naruto?!" Hinata exclaimed, bewildered. "Could this be Naruto's milk bath... but his apartment isn't around here. Only Jonin live in this district..."
"It's not a milk bath, and it's definitely not milk. This is..." Kiba's face flushed bright red as he struggled to spit the words out.
Growing up surrounded by the Inuzuka hounds, Kiba knew basic biology.
He had seen dogs breed.
He knew exactly what this cursed substance was!
Shino, on the other hand, possessed extensive theoretical knowledge but focused primarily on studying bugs.
His hive was nourished by Chakra, and even naturally bred insects lacked any distinctive odor.
Only mammals, due to their specific amine compounds, produced cursed scents similar to the heather flowers growing on Kakashi's balcony.
"Damn it! Forget about this puddle for now! Let's go upstairs and find out who threw this crap out the window!"
Faced with his innocent teammates' expectant gazes, Kiba couldn't bring himself to explain the birds and the bees.
He shifted his focus to catching the culprit instead.
"Byakugan!" Hinata followed Kiba's pointed finger, activating her dōjutsu.
Sadly, she was too late.
The Masked Man had already slipped away through dimensions.
"No one's inside," Hinata said, shaking her head.
"Even if it looks empty, we still need to investigate the scene! Akamaru, let's go!"
Kiba leaped up the wall, Akamaru right on his heels.
The hound smashed through the window first and charged into the apartment.
"Hell yeah! Looks like Akamaru found a crucial clue! Hinata, Shino, get up here!" Kiba had barely stepped onto the sill when he saw Akamaru's eagerness and yelled to his squad.
Hinata and Shino quickly scaled the wall, climbing through the shattered window.
However...
"Let's see... what evidence did you bag, Akamaru?" Kiba strode forward with a smug grin.
Then he watched Akamaru trot out of the kitchen with a massive bag of premium dog food, tearing into it and devouring the kibble ravenously.
"..."
"Akamaru, what the hell are you doing?!" Kiba felt his face burn with embarrassment in front of his team.
"Wait, Kiba, don't blame Akamaru just yet." Shino stopped Kiba from losing his temper, stepped forward, and patted the hound's head.
He then retrieved the empty dog food bag from beneath Akamaru's paws.
"Look at the label. We found the owner of this apartment—though knocking on the neighbor's door would have been easier..."
"Isn't that Kakashi-sensei's Ninja Dog on the brand? Is this Kakashi's apartment?"
Shino was interrupted mid-sentence again.
Hinata and Kiba stared in shock at the kibble bag, which had a big picture of Pakkun's grumpy pug face printed right on the front.
'Kakashi... what the hell has he been up to?'
'How did that cursed liquid that nearly drenched us end up in our teacher's bedroom?'