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Chapter 36: The Tavern's Two Problem Children. But the Strongest in Cuteness. (R-18)
"I'm Anya, meow!"
"I'm Chloe, meow!"
Lately, they were completely broke. The reason was simple: they had blown all their cash eating, drinking, and gambling. Naturally, since this entire broke-and-desperate mess was entirely the fault of these two idiots, absolutely no one was willing to lend them a single Valis, and Mama Mia certainly wasn't about to allow an advance on their paychecks.
"This is bad, meow! At this rate, we'll be stuck in absolute poverty until our next payday without even enough for a single Jagamarukun, meow!"
"What do we do, meow!? I only bet my money because you said it was a sure win, but we lost it all, meow!"
Since they lived at the tavern and were provided with meals, they at least didn't have to worry about starving. Still, that didn't change the cold, hard reality of their empty wallets. Strangers to the concept of patience, the two were already racking their brains for a way to turn things around in one fell swoop.
Just then, Chloe suddenly looked up and snapped her fingers, as if an idea had just struck her.
"Did you think of something good?" Anya looked at her with expectant eyes, and Chloe responded with a massive, triumphant grin.
"Nya-ha-ha! I completely forgot about it, but there are dirty books of the boy being distributed all over Orario right now! And we were used as models for some of them without our permission, meow!"
"Huh, meow? What about it, meow?"
"You're so slow, Anya. There's a little thing in this world called a licensing fee, meow! We're going to squeeze every last drop of cash out of whoever used our likenesses, meow!!"
"Ooh!! That's a great idea, meow!! …But how are we going to catch them, meow? That author runs so fast that even my big brother couldn't catch them, meow!"
At Anya's question, Chloe chuckled fearlessly.
"True, if they run, we won't be able to catch up, meow. However, a cat's hunt isn't just about the chase! You hold your breath, wait for the prey to come to you, and strike when their guard is down, meow! And when the prey gets close—chomp, meow!!"
"Ooh! As expected of Chloe, meow! You're so smart, meow!"
"Then it's settled! Let's get to work, meow!!"
In high spirits, the two burst out of the tavern and sprinted straight toward the Pleasure Quarter. Incidentally, whether this plan succeeded or failed, they were still skipping work. An iron fist from Mama Mia was inevitably waiting for them either way.
"We're in luck, meow! Apparently, they usually sell wholesale and rarely show their face in public, but today they're actually out selling the books directly, meow!"
"We're on a roll, meow! Let's extort enough money to cover all our gambling debts, meow!"
Listening to them talk, they sounded exactly like a pair of muggers. However, considering they had been used as models for an erotic book without their consent, the moral high ground clearly belonged to Anya and Chloe.
…Even if their actual motivation was utterly irredeemable—having blown all their cash on booze and gambling. That was beside the point.
As they made their way through the Pleasure Quarter, Chloe suddenly skidded to a halt. Erasing her presence, she peeked around the corner and gave a small nod.
—It seemed she had spotted their target.
"Listen up, meow. I'll circle around to the back. When I give the signal, you charge in, meow!!"
"Roger that, meow!!"
Fully unleashing her skills as a former assassin, Chloe slipped around to the target's blind spot like a shadow. So far, the author hadn't shown the slightest hint of noticing her. Chloe quickly flashed a hand signal to Anya, who was still watching from the corner.
Receiving the cue, Anya burst forward like a coiled spring.
"Prepare yourself, meow!!"
"We're taking all the money you earned as compensation, meow!!"
Shouting lines that made it really hard to tell who the actual criminals were, the two lunged at their prey. The author's eyes went wide with shock for a fraction of a second, but they immediately snatched up a bottle resting by their feet. In the next instant, twisting with unnatural agility, the author mercilessly splashed the contents of the bottle directly into the faces of the two approaching cat girls.
"Funya!? This smell is—!!?"
"It's Silver Vine Sake, meow~♡"
The two predators, who had just been glaring at their prey with sharp, deadly eyes, instantly melted into dopey, euphoric puddles the second the silver vine hit their noses.
"Ah, that was supposed to be a souvenir for my god, but… it saved my life, so whatever."
Deciding not to overstay their welcome, the author hastily bundled up their new releases and bolted. A while later, the two snapped out of their silver vine-induced stupor. Realizing their target had escaped, they pounded the ground, crying tears of sheer frustration. "We failed to rob them!!" they wailed, throwing a massive tantrum in the middle of the street.
"They got away, and they probably won't show their face again for a while, meow. Let's just go home."
"Yeah, meow… Nya?"
Dejected and empty-handed, Anya was just about to turn back when a fallen book caught her eye. Picking it up out of curiosity, she immediately recognized it as something the author had dropped in their haste to escape.
"Chloe! Chloe!! Look at this, meow!!"
"Hm? What is it, Anya? Wait, is this...!?"
The moment Chloe peeked at the book Anya had found, her ears perked up sharply. Emblazoned on the cover was a bold illustration of Anya and Chloe, both in swimsuits, clinging tightly to Bell.
The illustrated Anya was pressing her chest against Bell's surprisingly well-toned right arm, while Chloe was hugging his left arm, pushing her rear end against him. Sandwiched between two beautiful girls, Bell was bright red, clearly overwhelmed by the situation.
"Is this… a dirty book about us, meow!?"
"Hmm, they finally went for a threesome, meow. And we're the models. Ugh! If only we had caught them earlier, we could've extorted the profits from this one too, meow!!"
As Chloe clenched her fists in deep, bitter regret, Anya nervously flipped past the cover.
"Hm? Are you really that interested in the boy's book—oho! Did reading that previous book spark a little interest in the boy, meow?"
"N-No way, meow! I have zero interest in that white-haired brat. …But, I guess I'm a little curious about the dirty stuff… meow."
Anya fidgeted, her eyes darting around as she hid the lower half of her face behind the book. Her tail swished back and forth in sync with her embarrassment. Seeing her friend so intrigued by something naughty, Chloe's own cheeks flushed slightly as she teased her.
"Wow, you're so shameless, Miss Anya."
"If you're going to make fun of me, I won't let you read it, meow. I'm the one who found it, after all."
"Ah, sorry, I got carried away. I'm also really curious, so please let me read it with you!"
The moment Anya tried to hide the book, Chloe instantly prostrated herself, begging to see it. Suppressing a laugh at her rapid change in attitude, Anya relented and opened the pages so they could both see.
"The beach, meow!!"
"The sand, meow!!"
"Wait a minute, you two!!"
Inside the book, Anya and Chloe were depicted running across a sandy beach in adorable swimsuits, with Bell desperately chasing after them while carrying a parasol and a picnic basket.
If it were just this scene, it would be incredibly wholesome. But knowing exactly what kind of book this was, the two of them could easily guess where this was heading. Sure enough, when they turned the page, Bell had just finished setting up the parasol to create a shaded resting spot—which was exactly what the Anya in the book had been waiting for.
"Mufufu, Bell! Lie down right there, meow!!"
"Huh?"
"Your skin is way too pale, meow! I'll rub this Sunblock Potion on you so you don't get a sunburn, meow!"
The illustrated Anya presented the potion with a dramatic flourish, and Bell, easily convinced, lay down on his stomach as instructed. Staring down at Bell's defenseless back, the girl's eyes gleamed mischievously as she dripped the potion directly onto her own chest.
"Alright, I'm rubbing it in, meow♡"
"Hk!? A-Miss Anya!?"
"Hm? What's wrong, Bell? I'm just applying this so you don't burn, meow♡"
Playing completely innocent, the illustrated Anya pressed her breasts against Bell's back, sliding them around to smear the slick lotion all over him.
"U-Um, well… your, your breasts are touching me!"
"Hm? Did you say something, meow?"
"N-No, nothing…"
Whispering right into his ear, the hot breath of his assailant caused Bell to melt into a puddle, any semblance of resistance instantly vanishing.
"Whoa! Miss Anya, you're seriously shameless even in a book!!"
"Shut up, meow!! I would never do something like this, meow!!"
As Chloe teased her in absolute excitement, the real Anya bristled, her ears and tail standing straight up in anger. Despite their noisy squabbling, the two were extremely careful not to damage the book. Once they settled down, they eagerly flipped to the next page.
"Grrr! Leaving me out of the fun is unforgivable, meow!!"
"No one invited you, Chloe. After all, unlike me, you're pretty lacking in this department, meow!"
The panel heavily emphasized the bouncing chest of her counterpart with a pronounced jiggle sound effect. Seeing this flaunted right in her face, an angry vein popped out on the illustrated Chloe's head.
Naturally, she wasn't going to take that lying down. Snatching the potion from the other girl's hands, she squeezed it directly onto her own rear.
"Sure, my chest isn't as big as yours, but I have this gorgeous, perfect butt, meow! See? I bet the boy loves the feel of my ass way more than your chest, right, meow?"
"No he doesn't, meow! Bell is completely mesmerized by my boobs, meow!!"
"Hwaaaaah!!?"
Sandwiched between breasts and a pristine rear—a scenario packed with every man's hopes and dreams—Bell's face turned a hilarious shade of crimson as his entire body was rubbed down until he was slick and shiny.
"To think they could create a scenario where a man gets to savor both a chest and an ass at the exact same time… The gods themselves would acknowledge this genius smut author. They can't be underestimated, meow…"
"Why are you analyzing this so seriously, meow?"
As Chloe absentmindedly spouted otaku-like commentary, Anya rolled her eyes and turned the page. The next few panels featured them swimming in the ocean, building sandcastles, and splitting watermelons.
Unlike the previous scene, it was a perfectly wholesome slice-of-life montage. However, Anya and Chloe already knew precisely where this was heading.
"We played so much, I'm worn out."
"We swam in the ocean, played in the sand, ate lunch, and even had watermelon for dessert!"
"The only beach activity left is that, right!"
Flashing conspiratorial smiles, the illustrated girls grabbed Bell by the arms and dragged him toward a secluded rocky cove.
"Ah, yep, yep. It's a classic trope, meow."
"What is, meow?"
"Jeez, playing dumb again! I'm sure someone like you, who's slowly awakening to her inner pervert, already knows."
"Kh, I'm asking you what it is, meow!?"
"Oh, you genuinely don't know? Well, you'll figure it out if you keep reading, meow."
Annoyed by Chloe's smug teasing, Anya forcefully turned the page. Just as expected, the quintessential scene unfolded before them.
"Um, Miss Anya? Miss Chloe?"
"Just be a good boy, meow."
"You let us drag you all the way out here. Weren't you secretly hoping for this, meow?"
All the background extras from the beach scene had vanished. With his back pressed against the largest boulder in the cove, Bell was trapped between the two, both sporting the predatory grins of cats cornering a mouse.
At this point, even the real-life airhead Anya finally understood. Their manga counterparts were about to sexually assault Bell.
"Look, look! The boy's son is absolutely raring to go, meow!"
"Pitching a tent like this… just what exactly are you thinking about, Bell, meow?"
The two traced the tip of the massive tent stretching against Bell's swim trunks, relentlessly teasing him as he froze up, completely paralyzed by nervousness. Leaning in close to the petrified boy's ears, they blushed heavily as they let out synchronized cries.
"Nya~♡ Nya~♡ Nya~♡" x2
"Ew, we sounded exactly like cats in heat, meow—"
Witnessing this overly seductive duet of mewling, the two real-life girls cringed hard at how excessively lewd it was. What's worse, it wasn't some random strangers doing it—it was them. Even if it was just a comic, they were mortified. Anya and Chloe deeply regretted letting that female author escape.
"…You're the ones who provoked me."
"Funya? —Hk!?♡"
"Wait!! Boy—Hk!?♡"
The last thread of Bell's rationality abruptly snapped. Catching the illustrated Anya completely off guard, he aggressively claimed her lips. Immediately after, he captured the other girl's lips as well. Pushing both of them down onto the rocky ground, Bell ruthlessly forced his tongue into their mouths, alternating between them.
Under his expert tongue technique, the girls' resistance quickly melted away. Their perked-up ears and tails gradually went limp, fully submitting to the pleasure.
"Funya~♡" x2
"The boy—what a terrifying child!?"
"Kissing is amazing, meow…"
Seeing their manga counterparts accepting Bell's kisses with thoroughly melted, euphoric expressions, the real-life duo was stunned for two entirely different reasons.
Still riding that shock, they turned to the next page. A dark, predatory shadow fell over Bell's face, and he exhaled a puff of white breath accompanied by a menacing Hoooo!!! sound effect. Sensing the sudden danger radiating from him, the utterly mind-broken girls jolted back to their senses, their limp ears and tails shooting straight up in alarm.
"Just so you know, I don't think I can hold back."
With that declaration, Bell lunged at them. As payback for earlier, he started pinching and tracing their sensitive peaks with his fingers.
"~~~Hk♡" x2
"Hanyanyanya~!?"
"Whoa… Even if they provoked him, isn't the boy's technique a little too insane?"
Judging by the desperately suppressed moans and the expressions on their counterparts' faces, the two real girls realized exactly how godly Bell's finger technique was, letting out voices of utter bewilderment and admiration.
Their ears and tails, which had shot up in alarm at Bell's sudden shift in demeanor, quickly wilted again under his masterful touch. Tossing aside his swimsuit, Bell fully exposed his signature Zeus Rod, thrusting it right into their faces at kissing distance.
"(Hah!? What the heck is this size!!?, meow!?)"
"(Even with the strong scent of the ocean tide, the smell radiating from Bell's thing is so overwhelming—)"
Confronted by Bell's towering Zeus Rod, the illustrated duo exhibited different reactions, but their core thoughts were exactly the same.
"((There isn't a single Cat Person alive who wouldn't go into heat from this!!))" x2
Humans had a saying: "The eyes speak as much as the mouth." But for Cat People, it was more like "The ears and tail speak as much as the mouth." Their ears and tails were twitching uncontrollably with absolute, unmistakable anticipation.
"Seriously, if the boy's thing is actually this big, it's about the size of my entire face, meow!?"
"Is the smell really that amazing, meow!?"
Hearts pounding against their ribs, the two turned to the next page.
The panel showed their manga counterparts with heart-shaped pupils, leaning in close to Bell's Zeus Rod and carefully performing highly suggestive fellatio. Pushed to his absolute limit by their service, Bell unleashed a massive load of milk directly onto their faces.
"Ugh, it's so sticky, meow…"
"Spraying this much… are you trying to get our faces pregnant, meow?"
Covered in Bell's milk, the illustrated Anya whined in total disgust, while her partner flashed a teasing, highly amused smile.
"Hk, —!!♡"
Seeing their reactions, Bell's Zeus Rod grew even larger, expanding to its next evolutionary stage.
"Eek! Can something like that even fit, meow!?"
"Somehow, I feel like it's even bigger than it was in Ryuu's book, meow!?"
Staring at a member that was now roughly the size of a human arm, Chloe and Anya felt a mix of pure terror and a sudden, burning heat pooling in their lower abdomens. Feeling that heat, they vividly recalled the line they had read just a few pages prior: "There isn't a single Cat Person alive who wouldn't go into heat from this!!"
"Alright, who wants to go first?"
"Hk!!♡" x2
Flashing a sadistic grin that the real Bell would never dare show, he pressed his hands against their most sensitive areas, clearly savoring their reactions. That wicked smile sent an instant flutter♡ through their hearts, and without hesitation, both girls aggressively propositioned him at the exact same time.
"If you choose me, you can play with my big boobs, unlike Chloe's, meow♡"
"You should pick me, boy. If you do, you can do whatever you want with this beautiful ass, meow♡"
Faced with this agonizing choice, Bell pondered for a moment before finally pulling Anya into his embrace.
"Alright, we'll start with Miss Anya♡"
"Nyafufu! I knew Bell was a breast man over an ass man, meow♡"
"Guh! My gorgeous rear lost to Anya's chest, meow!!"
The illustrated Anya basked in the supreme superiority of being chosen first, while her counterpart seethed with jealousy.
"Mufufu, well, I am a mature older sister, meow. Obviously, I'm way more appealing than a nothing-but-ass Chloe, meow♪"
"Wow. Getting this full of yourself over something that happened in a comic? You're seriously being a pain in the ass right now, Miss Anya."
In the real world, too, Anya flashed an incredibly obnoxious, triumphant grin at having won the battle of appeal, while a deeply irritated Chloe hurled insults at her.
"Funya~♡ Be… Bell, a little—more gentle♡♡"
"My, my, is the super appealing Miss Anya already at her limit, meow?"
As the manga counterpart, thoroughly skewered by Bell's massive Zeus Rod, let out a pathetic whimper, the illustrated Chloe immediately fired back from the sidelines, rubbing salt in the wound as payback.
"Now, now, Miss Chloe. You shouldn't try to pick fights. I guess I'll just have to shut that mouth of yours♡"
"Nn♡"
Wrapping an arm around the taunting girl's waist, Bell pulled her close and forcibly silenced her with a deep kiss. The moment his tongue invaded her mouth, her eyes glazed over as she completely melted♡ into the sensation.
Ravishing two objectively beautiful girls at the exact same time, Bell was truly experiencing the peak definition of having a flower in each hand.
"Haa♡ Haa♡ Miss Anya, I'm going to…!!♡♡"
"Me too—Hk, Funya~!!?♡♡"
Surrounded by absolute heaven above and below, it didn't take long for Bell to reach his limit. The illustrated Anya, who had already been teetering on the edge, climaxed at the exact same moment Bell unloaded deep inside her. Accompanied by the lengthy, heavy sound of his ejaculation, her violently trembling tail wrapped tightly around Bell's waist, refusing to let him pull out.
After Bell had squeezed out every last drop of his milk, he slowly tried to separate their hips, but the death-grip tail stubbornly prevented his retreat.
"Oh my, looks like the boy is completely stuck, meow. And Anya's so mind-broken she doesn't even have the brainpower to let go. Looks like Big Sister Chloe is going to have to step in and save the day, meow♪"
With that, she leaned closely into the afterglow-drenched girl's ear and gently blew a soft puff of air into it.
"Hk♡"
The manga depicted a violent shudder of intense pleasure shooting down from her hypersensitive ear to the base of her spine. Her hips jerked upwards, and her tightly coiled tail went completely slack, dropping harmlessly away from Bell's waist.
"I see, I see. So Anya's weak point is her ears…"
"No it's not, meow! My ears aren't nearly that sensitive, meow!!"
"Well then, shall we test that theory, meow?"
"Nyanyanya!!?"
Sporting the mischievous grin of a cat about to cause trouble, Chloe leaned toward the flustered Anya's ears. Anya immediately leaped back, covering her ears tightly with both hands. Chuckling at her defensive reaction, Chloe smugly returned her attention to the doujinshi.
"Ughhh, it's gotta be Chloe's turn next. I'm definitely going to use whatever happens to make fun of her, meow."
Slightly teary-eyed, Anya kept her hands clamped over her ears as she shuffled back next to Chloe and peered at the book.
"Hey, hey, boy! After unloading that much inside Anya, do you even have the stamina left to handle me—oh, you do. Yes, you definitely do…"
Seeing the absolute carnage left behind—enough fluid to visibly stain a large patch of the sandy beach—the illustrated Chloe seemed caught between disappointment and immense relief that she wouldn't have to take on that monster size. She had tried to mock Bell, assuming he was drained, but fueled by his high-level adventurer recovery speed, Bell was instantly back at full mast, causing her confident taunt to rapidly fizzle out.
Fully revitalized and backed by heavy, thrumming sound effects, Bell ominously closed the distance on the terrified girl.
"Um, I really love Miss Anya's breasts, but I also absolutely love your naughty rear end, Miss Chloe. I'll try to hold back as much as possible, but I might end up being a little rough with you♡"
"P… Please go easy on me."
Faced with a declaration that sounded more like a ruthless threat, she offered a twitchy, strained smile, her legs visibly shaking.
However, her pleas were entirely in vain. On the very next page, the illustrated Chloe had been utterly decimated♡ in a one-on-one battle against Bell. Waving the white flag of complete defeat, she lay there as an ungodly mixture of fluids painted the sand around her.
"I'm sor♡ ry♡ I yield! I completely yield, meow♡ Please, forgive m-meee♡"
"Fuu!♡ Fuu!♡ I'm sorry, I don't think I can stop my hips on my own right now♡"
Exactly as Bell had promised, she had been ravished even more brutally than her partner. Completely drained of all life force, she collapsed face-first into the sand, barely managing to draw a breath.
"Whoa… Chloe's face looks super hideous right here, meow."
"Are you kidding me!? If I got pulverized by a monster rod like that, obviously my face is going to contort, meow!!"
Triggered by Anya's blissfully ignorant insult, Chloe protested fiercely, a vein popping on her forehead. Watching her counterpart surrender so pathetically had already pushed Chloe's sheer embarrassment to its absolute breaking point. Seeing Chloe so thoroughly humiliated, Anya—who had been seething from Chloe's teasing just moments ago—actually started to feel a tiny bit sorry for her.
"Come on, you two, stand up. You're the ones who provoked me first, so you're going to take full responsibility for this♡"
"H-Hanya~♡♡" x2
Bringing his fully recovered Zeus Rod right up to the faces of the two girls—who still couldn't even stand—the pungent, intoxicating aroma of their mixed bodily fluids hit them. Blushing fiercely, they breathed in the scent, and their switches were instantly flipped right back on.
"Just how overpowering is the smell of the boy's rod, meow!?"
"If we caught a whiff of it up close, would we end up like that too… meow!?"
Staring at their illustrated selves sporting heart-shaped pupils, tongues hanging out, and drooling like mindless animals in heat—looking far, far worse than their initial submission—the two real-life girls loudly gulped.
Recalling the face of the usually harmless-looking Bell who regularly visited the tavern—the boy who had now actually surpassed them in level—both girls found their eyes inextricably glued to the manga's depiction of his massive Zeus Rod.
"No, no, there's no way. If he didn't fall for Lady Freya's seduction, there's absolutely no way he'd go for girls like us." x2
Snapping back to reality, Anya and Chloe vehemently denied the possibility. However, their eyes remained riveted to the illustration. Completely betraying their dismissive words, both of their tails were gently swaying back and forth in subconscious expectation.
While the real girls wrestled with their internal conflict, the Bell in the book continued to flawlessly cycle between loving Anya and Chloe, immensely enjoying their broken reactions.
"Does that white-haired brat actually make a manly face like this, meow?"
"Maybe he does, meow? Who knows…"
It wasn't as if they had fallen in love with him. Still, having read two incredibly explicit books where they got tangled up with him, Bell had somehow managed to claw his way up into the "intriguing male prospect" rankings inside their minds.
Eventually, with both of them thoroughly knocked out by Bell, the absolute sexual titan, the R-18 section of the doujinshi drew to a close.
"Huh? Anya, Chloe, why do you both only have half a sunburn?"
"..." x2
The final page depicted the illustrated Anya with a severe sunburn exclusively on her back, and her counterpart with a severe sunburn exclusively on her front. Confronted by Syr's innocent question, the two girls awkwardly averted their eyes.
"What the heck is this, meow?"
"It's the punchline, meow. Come to think of it, we used our chests and asses to rub sunblock on the boy earlier, but we completely forgot to apply any to our own fronts and backs, meow."
Finishing the doujinshi, Anya just tilted her head with a massive question mark floating above it, while Chloe was utterly exasperated by the insane level of detail and continuity the author had committed to.
Closing the book, they finally prepared to head home, only for a sudden voice to freeze them in their tracks.
"Ah, I knew it. So this is where you were."
"Hm? Ryuu, what are you doing all the way out here, meow?"
"Oh, did you come out here to hunt down that author too, meow?"
"Incorrect. I came out here to hunt you down."
Ruthlessly shooting down their questions, Ryuu pressed a hand to her forehead and released an exhausted sigh. Massaging her temples, she stared at them with eyes reserved for pathetic creatures and delivered their death sentence.
"Mama Mia is absolutely furious that the two of you slacked off and haven't returned to the tavern."
"Funyanyanya!!?"
"C-Crap, meow!! We got so absorbed in reading the boy's dirty book about us that we completely forgot to head back before opening time, meow!!"
"…Chloe. What did you just say?"
"Ah…" x2
Watching the pity in Ryuu's eyes instantly ignite into flickering flames of pure, unadulterated jealousy, the two idiots realized they had just stepped on a massive landmine.
"I am finding it very difficult to maintain my composure. I believe we will have a nice, long talk about this right in front of Mama Mia."
Without another word, Ryuu clamped her hands tightly around the scruffs of Anya and Chloe's necks. It was a mystery where such monstrous strength came from in her slender frame, but she effortlessly hoisted both of them off the ground.
"W-Wait a second, meow!? We can talk about this, meow!!"
"Ryuu, calm down! This is a total misunderstanding—Nigyaaa!?"
Ignoring their desperate protests, Ryuu mercilessly dragged the two of them away. The rough scraping of their bodies against the Pleasure Quarter's cobblestones, accompanied by their pathetic shrieks, echoed endlessly into the night.
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