"Working here as an assistant? This Adeptus sister?"
After listening to Orion's explanation, Xiangling was completely stunned.
She glanced at Shenhe, who was as cold as ice yet ethereal, then looked at her own small, broken kitchen with gray walls and earthen tiles, its walls stained yellow by oil fumes. A strange feeling of defiling an immortal appeared in her heart.
At this moment, Orion was already giving instructions to Shenhe.
"How about choosing this place as one of the locations for your Mundane World Trial of the Heart? I think this place is one of the most lively and 'human-smelling' spots in Liyue Harbor. You can work here for half a day, and accompany me at WangSheng Funeral Parlor for half a day. How does that sound?"
"Acceptable." Shenhe replied succinctly with a single word.
She looked at the dishes Xiangling had prepared, subtly revealing her pink tongue to moisten her red lips. The food Orion gave her was delicious, and the food here should also be very good. Did this mean this was what Orion called resisting temptation?
Indeed, it was a very difficult cultivation.
As soon as he finished speaking, Orion was pulled aside by Xiangling. She whispered, "No, are you serious? Didn't you say she was an adeptus's disciple? You're having an adeptus's disciple work as an assistant here?"
Orion looked at her strangely: "What's wrong with being an adeptus's disciple? Aren't you also an adeptus's disciple? Aren't you also working as a chef here?"
Xiangling:???
She pointed at herself: "Me?"
"That's right." Orion put his hands in his pockets: "Your master is Grandma Ping?"
"That's right. Eh? How did you know?"
"Don't worry about how I know. Grandma Ping, Streetward Rambler, her current old woman appearance is a magical transformation. Her true form is a great beauty."
Xiangling was completely stunned. Was this a joke? How did she, from an ordinary family, suddenly gain an Adeptus master with such a trendy name?
Seeing Xiangling lost in a daze, Orion walked back to Shenhe to explain a few more things.
"Now, let me ask you, if you were to serve a plate of food to a guest, and the guest, overcome with lust, suddenly wanted to touch your hand, what would you do?"
"Why would they be overcome with lust?"
"Because I think you're very beautiful. You answer me first, what would you do?"
"...Oh, then I'd smash the plate onto their face."
"Uh..."
"What? Is that not allowed?"
"Dishes fresh out of the pot are seventy to eighty degrees Celsius, and the human face has many important nerves and organs. Your strength is also quite great, so you could easily kill someone."
"Then what should I do? Just let him touch me?"
"You could break his hand? If he doesn't have a hand, he can't touch you, right?"
Shenhe: "!! You're so smart, I'll listen to you."
Skirk on the side: (•ิ_•ิ)?
To be honest, if it were her, she would do the same. But hearing Orion reject Shenhe's idea, she thought Orion intended to be tolerant. A ninety-degree turn almost threw out her back.
Orion continued to educate: "The guest has finished eating and plans to dine and dash. What do you do?"
Shenhe tilted her head: "What is dining and dashing?"
"It means he doesn't want to pay after eating."
"Then I'll break his hand."
"No, if you break his hand, wouldn't he have even more reason not to pay? How can he take out money with a broken hand?"
"Then what should I do? You teach me."
"You break his leg, that way he can't run away."
"That makes sense, I'll listen to you."
Skirk: (◎_◎)
Skirk felt that if Orion had children in the future, he shouldn't be allowed to raise them. She could already tell that Orion had intended to talk about obeying laws and turning them over to the authorities, but after he himself mentioned a hooligan touching Shenhe's hand, he got angry, and his words changed their meaning.
Skirk, who never bothered to obey laws, could only take on the role of godmother. She reminded, "Shenhe, actually, turning them over to the Millelith can also solve the problem."
Shenhe was stunned for a moment, then suddenly realized: "I see, but if I've already broken his leg, how do I turn him over to the Millelith?"
Orion: "You can carry him over, you're strong."
"Then what if he touches my hand when I'm carrying him?"
"Then you break his hand too."
"You're experienced, I'll listen to you."
Skirk:...Forget it, let's just leave it at that. Anyway, I used to do the same thing.
On the side, Xiangling snapped back to reality and looked at the room full of divine beings.
Skirk, Cool Master Swordswoman.
Shenhe, a goddess inexperienced in worldly affairs.
Orion, a super giant werewolf capable of beating a Anemo Archon's familiar into a shutdown state.
Her own master, a True Monarch hidden in the mortal world.
She felt that among this group of divine beings, she, as an ordinary person, seemed weak, helpless, and pitiful.
She picked up Guoba from her feet and hugged him: "Sigh, Guoba, among this whole family, only the two of us are ordinary. It's so good to have you."
Guoba: "Lulu lu?"
.
.
.
.
In the afternoon, Shenhe stayed at Xiangling's house to help prepare ingredients, and Orion didn't need to report to WangSheng Funeral Parlor for the time being, so he took Skirk directly home.
He left a Miliastra Wonderland ticket with Shenhe, but didn't grant entry permission. However, Shenhe could use this item to contact him directly, and he could also sense Shenhe's location.
Shenhe was the type who, if a stranger lecherously stared at her, she would immediately go up and poke out their eyes, then dig out their eyeballs to stomp on. So Orion was somewhat unsure if Shenhe would have any negative changes seeing the enchanting atmosphere within the Realm.
It's better to wait until they're more familiar.
And now, after Orion returned to the Realm with Skirk, he saw an incredible scene.
"Wow! So high, so high! Sister Sucrose, this is so much fun!"
"Little Klee! Make sure to hold onto Sister Clara's hand and don't run around!"
"I know, Sister Sucrose!"
Clara was holding little Klee's hand while riding a giant Ferris Wheel, and Sucrose was shouting from below for Klee to be careful.
Unexpectedly, Sucrose had brought Klee today.
Orion scanned the area; Fischl and Mona hadn't come, nor had Amber, Eula, Barbara, or Jean. It seemed only Sucrose had brought Klee.
Noelle, Lumine, and Paimon weren't here, probably busy with the Rite of Descension?
Yunli was home, and the Demonic Sanzomon was also there. The two were sitting at a small table peeling and eating oranges.
It was rare for both of them to be here. Usually, Yunli would go to the blacksmith's forge Orion built for her to play with iron. And the Sanzomon, as the leader of the Joyful Zen, the national religion of Immernachtreich, was busy writing doctrines for Fischl every day. She seemed very enthusiastic about teaching Fischl; last time she said Fischl had good genetics, and that her 'needs would grow with age,' and he didn't know what exactly she was teaching.
Orion and Skirk exchanged glances. Skirk walked over to the coffee table, sat next to the Demonic Sanzomon, and started peeling an orange, while Orion went over to Sucrose.
"Sucrose, how come you have time to come today?"
"Eh? Ah! It's Senior Orion!" Sucrose politely bowed, then adjusted her glasses that had slipped down from bending over: "It's nothing, Senior. It's just that little Klee said she wanted to play here, so we came. Actually, we've been here a few times during the day before, but you were always out, so we never met."
Orion thought about it; so that was it. He had been out doing magic tricks and light shows every day recently, so they naturally wouldn't have met.
He glanced at Klee and Clara playing, then motioned for Sucrose to sit beside him: "Come, Sucrose, sit down. Don't worry about them, Klee won't be in danger with Clara."
He sat down first in an empty spot at the coffee table, where two bottles of orange liquid, looking very much like orange juice, were in front of him.
Orion didn't think much of it, opened a bottle, and took a gulp. It didn't taste like orange, but the flavor wasn't bad.
Unexpectedly, just as he took a drink, Sucrose suddenly shrieked: "Ah! Senior! You can't drink that!"
Orion, Yunli, and the others all looked at Sucrose. Sucrose tremblingly pointed at the bottle: "Se-Senior, that's an alchemy potion I made, it's my [Truth Serum 3058 Type II]!"
Orion:...Why didn't you say so sooner!!!
-
-
-
-