"Hmmm. Judging from Shirone's expression, I'd say the date went well~ I'll be digging for all the juicy details later, so be ready for an interrogation, nya~"
The moment we opened the front door, Kuroka greeted us with a mischievous smirk and a declaration of questioning.
"W-Well, let's set that aside for now. After we put our stuff down, shall we head over to Issei's place? We've got guests coming today, remember. Kuroka, you coming too?"
I tried steering the topic away, and thankfully, at least for now, she didn't press further.
"Hmmm... I've got a feeling it's gonna be interesting, so sure, I'm in~"
Why do I get the feeling that when Kuroka says "interesting," it never bodes well?
Even with that unease lingering, we arrived at Issei's house and were invited inside.
=====================
"Hohohoho! The red-haired lass and the black-haired lass are quite well-endowed! And the blue-haired and chestnut-haired girls ain't bad either!"
There, standing in casual clothes and an eyepatch, was a pervy old god, Odin. Oh right... he was supposed to come today.
Behind him stood Rossweisse-san, whom I'd briefly seen before in her silver hair and suit, along with a rugged, battle-hardened man who gave off major warrior vibes. That must be Akeno-senpai's father, Baraqiel.
Akeno-senpai had dropped her usual gentle smile and was radiating an intense, thorny aura. Maybe that's why the room felt so tense. Her usual calm, soothing presence had gone beyond zero and shot straight into the negatives.
Odin then turned toward us as we entered the room.
"Oho! Another fine lady with quite the... assets! Yes, yes! If you're in Japan, you simply must wear a kimono or a yukata!"
As he said this, he stared blatantly at Kuroka's generous chest. At this point, I feel justified in calling him just Odin, no honorifics.
"SMAAACK!!"
While Odin was ogling the Occult Research Club's lineup of busts, Rossweisse-san struck him with a paper fan. Honestly, it'd be better if that fan was made of steel or something.
"Honestly! Odin-sama, please show more dignity as the chief god of Norse mythology! Looking at the chests of women from other factions like that disgraces all of Scandinavia!"
Odin sighed and rubbed the spot she hit.
"You're too uptight. With this many lovely ladies around, not appreciating them would be a greater insult, wouldn't it? Oh, that reminds me, I haven't introduced this one yet. This is Rossweisse, my personal assistant, Valkyrie, and a proud lifetime single."
What an introduction. If he wasn't a god, she could sue him for defamation.
Rossweisse-san looked like she was about to cry.
"B-Being single has nothing to do with this, Odin-sama! I-I didn't choose this life! It just happened, okay!?"
She fired back, but Odin simply stroked his beard and spoke as if giving sage advice.
"Still, Rossweisse, a Valkyrie who's supposed to be the lover of heroes not having even one boyfriend is problematic, no? That's probably why you were always stuck in the corner of Valhalla's Valkyrie division. You're young and pretty, go after what you want."
"That's easy for you to say! It's not like there are any real heroes or warriors around anymore! I know I'm useless! I know I'm going to die a virgin! Waaaahhh!"
Devastated by her own god's words, Rossweisse-san collapsed in tears. But to be fair, it's true, real wars are rare these days, and in the age of guns and missiles, one-man-army heroes are basically five-star gacha rares.
Azazel-sensei took a sip of tea and chimed in.
"While Odin's in Japan, we'll be in charge of his protection. I've been too busy to keep watch myself, so I'm assigning Baraqiel to assist. He's just as strong as I am in a fight, so he's perfect for the job. That said, old man... wasn't your visit supposed to be scheduled for later? It's pure luck that Baraqiel finished his previous assignment early, if not, we wouldn't have had anyone decent to handle this. Grigori is short on high-ranking staff these days."
Odin sighed again.
"I know. But I couldn't delay it any longer. There are those who find my dealings with other pantheons unacceptable and are starting to cause trouble. I decided to come here before they could interfere."
"Everyone's got problems. Just promise me one thing, don't start Ragnarök on a whim, alright?"
"Right back at you. You just signed a peace treaty yourselves, remember? There's still a chance Armageddon could break out."
Azazel muttered under his breath, "Damn old man," but continued the conversation.
"Well, as long as you're not planning anything, we've got no reason not to help. There's still time before your meeting with the Japanese gods. Anywhere you want to go in the meantime?"
Odin's eyes sparkled.
"I want to go to a strip club!"
Azazel-sensei laughed.
"You're speaking my language, old man! One of our young guys just opened a VIP place, I'll take you there. Fallen angel women are great! So many of them are the kind of cute that drives men wild!"
"Wonderful! Please make sure the boobs are top-tier!"
"Want me to dress them in kimonos too? We can even do the 'Oh no~ my obi's coming off~' routine. As the Norse chief god, you deserve to learn Japan's rich culture and tradition, right?"
...Why is the fallen angel governor general the one teaching "Japanese tradition"? Shouldn't a Japanese person do that?
Laughing like idiots with their arms around each other, the two gods were in full party mode.
"Odin-sama! I'm going with you!"
"If Azazel's going, I don't mind. You can stay here if you like."
"Absolutely not! I have no idea what you'd do if I wasn't watching you!"
"Hohoho! Hm? What was that? I can't hear too well these days. Azazel, got any bright ideas?"
"Sounds like you need to relax. I'll throw in a private strip show too. Guaranteed stress relief!"
Rossweisse-san was absolutely being toyed with.
And just as the two perverts were about to head out, footsteps approached from the hallway, and with a loud slam, the door burst open.
"Honestly! I arrived right on time, so why was no one at the teleport gate to greet me!? I waited and waited, but no one showed up! I know we were enemies during the Rating Game, but this is just rude!"
It was Ravel. Her eyes were a little watery. Crap. We completely forgot.
Everyone else looked equally awkward, clearly, we'd all been too distracted by the divine surprise guests.
"S-Sorry, Ravel. We had an unexpected visitor, so…"
"That's no excuse, Rias-sama!"
"Ugh… yeah…"
Honestly, we should've at least left Yuuto to greet her and explain. This one's on all of us, we'll just have to apologize together later.
"So? Who's this urgent guest who caused trouble for a member of the Phenex family? I'd like a word with them at the very least!"
The old man in shorts and a shirt stepped forward.
"That would be me. Apologies for the oversight... But my, you have a very promising bust for the future."
With that sudden harassment, Ravel instinctively crossed her arms and stepped back.
"What's wrong with you!? Who says that to a lady they've just met!?"
Behind Odin, Rossweisse-san was already cradling her head. Her nation's dignity had just been shattered, no, obliterated.
Then Ravel narrowed her eyes, a look of suspicion forming.
"Wait a moment... Have we met before?"
She searched her memory for a bit, muttering to herself, then finally recalled.
"That's it! You were in the audience during the last Rating Game! You're the Norse chief god... Odin-sama…"
As she realized who he was, sweat trickled down her face. Meanwhile, Azazel and Odin looked extremely amused.
"Hmm? What's the matter? Didn't you want to give me a piece of your mind? Go on, don't be shy."
"That's right. When else will a god personally invite you to insult him? Let it all out."
But then, SMACK!
Rossweisse-san struck Odin again with her paper fan, and I followed up by whacking Azazel-sensei with my own.
Couldn't just stand by while a girl I know got steamrolled by two overpowered men abusing their status.
"Odin-sama, that was going too far! We're the ones who showed up unannounced, you should show a little restraint!"
Odin was actually getting scolded. Meanwhile, Azazel-sensei was crouched over in pain.
"Guhhh!! That hurt! What the hell is this fan made of!?"
"It's a special one I made after seeing Grayfia-san use a fan at the peace talks. It's enchanted to amplify pain, 'Pain Strike! Mr. Fan!' Kuroka helped me put it together."
"You idiot! Making weird gear is my job! …Still, a comedy fan weapon, huh? Might be worth trying…"
Uh-oh. I think I accidentally gave him a new idea.
"Ah, young people are such fun. So, what brings you here, dear devil girl? Visiting for fun?"
"Y-Yes! My apologies, Odin-sama. I came to broaden my experience as a noble and to assist everyone in their work. I thought it would be valuable to learn firsthand how things operate, to better serve the Underworld in the future…"
Ravel was clearly intimidated, but Odin nodded in approval.
"Good attitude for one so young. In that case, why not join my escort? It's not every day you get to protect a god."
"Odin-sama! What are you saying!?"
Rias raised her voice in alarm.
"Relax. It's not like any fools would actually attack me in Japan. And even if something did happen, she can just stay in the back and toss out some fireballs. Besides, she's from the Phenex family, she won't die from a stray bullet or two. Consider it my way of apologizing for the sudden visit."
He stared at Ravel seriously, well, it would have been serious if his gaze hadn't been fixated on her cleavage.
He just wants more cute girls on his escort team, doesn't he?
Fortunately or unfortunately, Ravel didn't notice his gaze and turned to Rias.
"Rias-sama, this might be a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. I would like to accept the duty of escort."
"Ravel is a strong magic-user. Having her join the team is reassuring. And even if something unexpected happens, we have enough firepower to handle it."
Thus, with Rias unwittingly raising a flag, Ravel officially joined Odin's escort team. Azazel-sensei and Rossweisse-san would be spending the night in a heavily guarded fallen angel facility (read: lewd club), so the actual escort duties would begin tomorrow.
Everyone left looking just a little tired.
Later that night, both Kuroka and little Koneko climbed into bed with me.
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Note: This chapter features the final heroine, Ravel. Initially, she was just a fan of Ikki due to his rumored engagement and his actions during the Diodora fight. However, after learning about Kuroka and being saved by Ikki, she's begun to see him in a new light, as a man.