"You're saying you've been going into the 24th Ward every single day? And that you found a vampire?"
Touka stares at me in disbelief as she repeats my words.
"Yeah, pretty much."
I'm not trying to hide the facts.
"I was hunting ghouls down there for weeks to get stronger. Then I ran into a vampire that tried to eat me. So I ate him."
She already knows I can evolve by eating supernatural beings.
"You ate him?"
Her right eye twitches slightly.
"What the hell, Arata? Are you insane?! Do you know how dangerous the 24th Ward is? And vampires are actually real?"
I scratch my cheek, looking away from her.
"Well, I'm a vampire now too, so..."
"That doesn't make it sound any better!"
She shouts before smacking me on the head.
"Ow!"
That hurt. But I laugh seeing steam coming from her fists.
"Idiot! You could've died! What were you thinking?"
Her voice sounds angry, but I can feel concern in her frequencies washing over me in waves.
Sighing, I put my hands behind my head and lie down in the grass, gazing at the blue sky and white clouds.
"I needed to get stronger fast. Like I told you before. There are more monsters out there than we know about. If I didn't get stronger, I couldn't protect the people I care about."
Like this time.
If I were the old Arata, I'd definitely try to help Touka too, but both Touka and that Arata would've ended up dead.
She stays quiet for a moment, maybe the same train of thought crossing her mind. After a few seconds of silence, she sits down beside me in the grass.
"People you care about?"
"Mm. You, Saya, Rei, and Mrs. Yuriko... Oh, and Miss Marikawa too, I guess. Not many, but they're precious to me."
Her cheeks flush slightly pink.
"Idiot..."
She mumbles while look away.
As if suddenly realizing something shocking, she looks back at me. This time, there's sinister danger emanating from her.
"Why do all those names sound like girls' names?"
"..."
She slowly leans toward me. Her face is very close to mine and her warm breath hits my skin.
Too scary, those eyes.
"Why aren't you answering, silly boy?"
"Well, now that you mention it... But it's because I spend more time with girls! It's not my fault."
"That's exactly what a playboy would say. Hmph."
She crosses her arms with disdain in her eyes.
I smile. I like when she gets like this. She's way cuter than the version of Touka that acts cold and distant.
"Hey, Touka. Check this out."
The moment she shows curiosity at my words, I open my mouth slightly to show my small fangs.
"See? I have vampire fangs now. Doesn't it look cool?"
Touka looks at them closely and then pulls back a bit.
"It's gross."
With a face shadowed with disgust and eyes narrowed in contempt, she says those words.
Though somehow this girl has the nerve to show a blushing face.
"Really? I like them."
I touch my fangs with my tongue.
"Now I can bite people if I want and drink their blood. Kukuku... Actually, I could bite you right now."
"Bite me and I'll break your neck."
I pout.
"Boring."
I sit up and stretch. The Sunday morning feels great. Honestly, I'd stay here all day just resting and talking with Touka.
"So that's why you changed so much? Your hair, your eyes, and your skin. Because you're a vampire now?"
"Mm. When I evolved into a vampire, my body changed completely. I don't look like a zombie anymore. I can walk in sunlight without burning, and..."
I'm not sure if I should tell Touka this. The discovery I made the week I started school.
"And?"
Hah... I guess I'll tell her. Actually, it's the best decision since it might be useful for her to know in advance.
"Now I can enjoy human food."
It's a discovery that brought color back to my life.
Being able to taste coffee and sandwiches again... It was something that almost made me cry in the school cafeteria.
Also, when I got back to the Takagi mansion, that same day I ate three fat, greasy burgers and two whole pizzas. It was my way of celebrating. Mrs. Yuriko and Saya stared at me wide-eyed as I ate all that.
"What? No way!"
Touka leans toward me.
"It's true. I can eat anything, though my body still needs blood."
I smile with sealed lips.
She looks me up and down, her eyes full of disbelief, her brows furrowed in confusion and her mouth slightly open.
"So you can eat human food now, huh..."
"Mm."
What she does is look at her hands with an empty expression, then look at the sky.
"Isn't it... unfair?"
"Huh? What are you talking about?"
She clenches her fists tightly, her gaze lost in the distance.
"I always had to pretend my friend's food tasted delicious, when it actually tasted disgusting and I could barely swallow it without throwing up."
Her voice is low and melancholic.
"I always wondered why humans could enjoy so many simple things. A hot coffee in the morning, a sweet dessert after dinner... All those little joys were forbidden to me. And suddenly you, who aren't even human, can enjoy them without any problem."
She turns to look at me again, and in her blue eyes I see a spark of bitterness shine.
"It's cruel. That a ghoul like me, born to be a monster, can't enjoy the things that even a monster like you can."
The wind blows her hair and the grass around us.
Being a ghoul, living among humans, trying to be normal, but always feeling like an outsider. Being unable to enjoy the most basic things that define human normalcy.
That lonelinss and that envy have been slowly consuming her, and now I've reopened that wound with my words.
"I'm sorry."
She shakes her head, and a bitter smile forms on her lips.
"No, it's not your fault. It's the life we got, I guess."
We stay silent for a while.
In that moment, I remember that in my past life, when I read the manga, I never really thought about the emotional side of being a ghoul. I always saw it as a power and not as a curse. A curse that isolates and tortures those who suffer it.
In this life I got to experience it firsthand, but in a different way. As a zombie, then as a ghoul, and now as a vampire.
Now I can eat, but at the same time I'm a monster that needs blood to survive. My life isn't normal, and it never will be.
I can accept that fact.
But Touka wanted a normal life where she could sit with her human friends and share a meal without feeling like a fraud.
She might not accept that reality. Or even if she accepts it, she'll always end up feeling inferior.
She can't evolve like me. And she can never become a vampire.
At least not on her own.
I could transform her.
A scene where Touka enjoys human food for the first time... That's something I want to see.
The idea crosses my mind and stays there.
Because I still don't know how I can transform others. I don't know if it depends on my strength, the situation, or if compatibility between different races needs to be taken into account.
While Touka is lost in her thoughts, I decide not to tell her mine yet.
It's not that I'm afraid. But if I say it now, and I can't follow through, then my promise will become false hope for Touka.
"Let's talk about something else. This is depressing."
Letting out a heavy sigh, expelling all the bitterness in the world from her lungs, Touka says those words.
"So..."
She stares at me, with a curious expression on her face.
"Can you be considered a monster salad now? Is that it? You're a zombie, a ghoul, a parasite, and a vampire."
I burst out laughing at her words.
"Yeah, I guess so. I'm a monster salad. Maybe I should add some pepper and serve myself on a plate. Want to eat me?"
"No thanks!"
She says quickly while moving away from me.
"Ugh... You're so mean, Touka..."
We laugh together for a while. It's nice. I'm glad I came to see her today.
Speaking of which...
"I'm sorry. What happened to you today is my fault."
Apologizing properly to her.
"What?"
"Like Mr. Yoshimura said, the CCG came with a Special Class Investigator accompanied by dozens of investigators to find me."
Every action has consequences.
That consequence almost got Touka killed.
So apologizing is the least I can do.
The recipient of my apology, Touka, stares at me for a few seconds.
Then, to my surprise, she twists her lips in a grimace of disapproval.
"Em. What's with that look?"
"Because you're saying stupid things."
She snorts.
"It's not your fault, idiot. That investigator attacked you first, right? Defending yourself is the right thing to do."
"But—"
"And I'm a ghoul living in human territory. There was always a risk the CCG would find me eventually. It's not your fault it happened today."
"Besides, you came to save me. You killed all those bastards who wanted to kill me. You even killed the Special Class Investigator who wore the armor made from my father..."
Her voice breaks slightly on that last part.
"So stop apologizing. You're annoying me."
I smile a little.
"You're pretty tsundere, you know that?"
"S-shut up!"
She pokes my arm with a flushed face.
Heh, why don't you dye your hair pink and tie it in twin tails? It'd suit you perfectly.
While I'm thinking about a pink Touka, she asks something she's probably been wondering.
"Where am I supposed to live now?"
Oh, right. Her house was completely destroyed.
"You can leave that to me."
×××
My stones... What happened to my stones...
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