I wish we could talk openly like we do when we're telling a third person about our fight—talk without filter or fear that you might twist my words. I wish I were strong enough to tell you to go and date the person you hope for me to become rather than wait to see me become something I'm not. I mean, I want to become that person too, but like they say, you shouldn't love someone praying they change; you can only love them as they change. I pray I'm your type because sometimes I just want to tell you to try and date your type whenever we fight. I'm a strong advocate for people dating their type, and that's why I chose you. Is it the reason you chose me? Sometimes I feel like telling you to let me be 22 because why are you forcing me to be 39? Let me be my age, goddammit. Sometimes I wish we could be around each other and resonate with most of the things, conversation-wise, but I think our IQs are just so different. I wish I were more open and profound, but you wouldn't understand that I want 'you'. I'm telling you all this because I want you to know what is affecting me in our relationship, but doing so would mean 'you' affecting me even more because I'll have to start explaining every statement, breaking everything down. More importantly, I can't because I don't want to risk losing you by trying to be different instead of accepting, that this is the downside of dating. I love you a lot to risk how happy you make me just because I know I can be happier. if we are being realistic, where does it end? if we get past this, we'll still have other challenges and I think I'm basically defining life. I'm certain you are all I need and, more importantly, my type. Therefore, I never rush to mention breaking or breaking up when we have a misunderstanding because I would rather get past it with you than text you "I miss you" a week after our break on your Gmail because you blocked me on all socials. Even today, I still choose you baby.
- The author tried to listen to his therapist and talk to Kimberly as he did with his therapist, but he knew he might mess it up, so he wrote everything he wanted to say to her with the intention of reading it out loud to her and not leaving out a single thing.