The most exaggerated was the short video from "New World Gossip King": Kaido's dragon head special effect dominated the entire screen, accompanied by a catchy, brainwashing narration: "First hit, Flowing Cherry! Second hit, Conquerors Haki Infusion! Third hit… (censored here)…"
....
At Navy Headquarters, Fleet Admiral Sengoku's roar shattered all the glass in his office: "Garp, look at the good deed your grandson has done!!!"
Garp picked his nose, with over a dozen different versions of battle reports spread out before him: "Huh? Isn't this pretty good… At least he didn't learn bad things from Kaido." He suddenly remembered something and added, "Oh, Luffy seems to have used the Armament Haki basics taught by Rayleigh…"
"Shut up!!!"
....
Windmill Village,
"Bang!"
The wooden door of Makino's pub was violently flung open.
"Look! Luffy's trending!"
The previously noisy pub instantly fell silent, then erupted into thunderous cheers, beer mugs clinking in the air, ale spilling everywhere, but no one bothered to wipe it up.
"Hahaha! See that!" Old Village Chief Woop Slap slammed the table, his wig, which he had worn for over a decade, flew off with his excited movement, landing perfectly on the roasted chicken at the bar, "That's the boy from our Windmill Village!"
Makino's hand, wiping a glass, trembled slightly, her eyes a little red: "That little Luffy who always got bruised and battered… he's already this amazing."
In a corner, old Tom the fisherman, who Luffy used to pester for pirate stories, chugged a large gulp of beer, his beard covered in foam: "I told you long ago! The look in that kid's eyes when he said he wanted to be the Pirate King… it was definitely real!"
In the center of the pub, a group of children were imitating Luffy's pose from the newspaper, when a red-haired boy suddenly shouted: "I want to learn Conquerors Haki Infusion!" Only to be grabbed by the ear by his mother next to him: "You dare! Finish your homework first!"
Makino, the pub owner, wiped her moist eyes, then turned and took out a bottle of fine wine, treasured for many years, from the cabinet: "All drinks half price today! For our little Luffy!"
The cheers almost blew the roof off. The old village chief took the opportunity to climb onto a table, his bald head gleaming under the chandelier: "Folks! I propose—" He raised his glass, "—to change the 'Weakest Sea' sign at the village entrance to 'Hometown of the Future Pirate King'!"
"Agreed!!!"
Just then, the visual Den Den Mushi hanging on the wall suddenly activated on its own, playing a short video of Luffy beating up a Marine Vice Admiral. The pub instantly fell silent, everyone holding their breath, staring at Luffy's determined eyes on the screen.
"Gum-Gum—Haoshoku Stamp!"
When they saw the foot, wrapped in black and red lightning, kick Onigumo into the sea, the entire Windmill Village erupted!
Villagers ran out from their homes, starting a feast!
Meanwhile, on the cliff behind the mountain, Dadan's family was secretly wiping away tears. These rough men from the bandit den were crying like children at this moment.
"Stinky brat…" Dadan sniffled, liking and saving all the videos related to Luffy, and worriedly said, "Be careful in the future, don't you die…"
The windmills spun joyfully in the sunset, carrying the festive atmosphere further afield. On the dock, the merchants who had once mocked Luffy's dream exchanged glances, one of them muttering quietly: "How about… we go have a drink too?"
....
Onigashima,
"Boom—!"
A giant projection screen lit up on the Onigashima cliff, casting high-definition images of Kaido's "Haki Crash Course" onto the sea. Thousands of Beasts Pirates subordinates crowded on the reefs, each with a bucket of popcorn, looking like they were attending an outdoor movie festival.
"Pay attention!" A Gifters wearing a "Teacher Kaido Fan Club" headband pressed pause, pointing a laser pointer at Luffy's fist on the screen, "The key to this punch is the fluidity of the Conquerors Haki Infusion!"
When the video played a slow-motion shot of Luffy punching Onigumo away, the entire coastline erupted.
"Long live Teacher Kaido!!!" A pirate with a club totem tattooed on his chest excitedly ripped open his shirt.
"Crash course is awesome!!!" Several Headliners cried, hugging each other, "Twenty years of our hard training is not as good as getting hit twice by him!"
"When's the next class starting?!" A group of Waiters waved homemade banners wildly, with "Beg for abuse, beg for beatings, beg for awakening" written on them.
King stood on the tallest spire of Onigashima, his black wings twitching unconsciously, his right eye under the mask twitching non-stop, looking at the surreal scene below:
The plaza, usually used for executing enemies, was now filled with "Kaido Education Group Enrollment" booths. Queen was wiggling his obese body, dancing his self-created recruitment dance in front of a booth: "Enroll now and get a plague bullet souvenir~"
Jack was directing a mammoth transport team, selling "Kaido-style Clubs (Child-Safe Version)" by the cartload.
Even the usually aloof Black Maria had set up a tent for "Beating Posture Guidance," and business was so booming that people had to take numbers to queue.
"Big Brother…" King lost a few feathers, his voice trembling, "We are the terrifying Beasts Pirates…"
Just then, Kaido's Azure Dragon form peeked out from the clouds, letting out a drunken burp: "Ugh-kuku-kuku… King! Come look at my newly designed LOGO!"
Kaido's dragon claw then unfurled a gigantic flag—the original ferocious Beasts Pirates emblem now had a cartoon Kaido head next to it, with the text "Three Hits to Mastery, Guaranteed Learning," and a small line below it saying "No Responsibility If You Don't Learn."
King's wings completely froze. He silently pulled out his phone, only to find that his lock screen had been automatically replaced with an advertisement image for "Teacher Kaido's Little Classroom."
"Oh, right!" Kaido suddenly remembered something, his dragon tail coiling a stack of flyers and dropping them down, "Next week we're filming a 'Thunder Bagua' action tutorial video, and you'll be the demonstration model!"
King looked at the flyer floating before him, which had the title "How to Take a Proper Beating—Demonstrated by 'Fire Disaster' King Himself," accompanied by a classic image of him being sent flying by Kaido's club.
"I…" King's feathers instantly puffed up like a dandelion, "I want to take leave!!!"
Then Kaido thought for a moment, "Sell goods first, no more apprentices."
...
Kaido's TikTok account gained eighty million followers overnight. Under his latest short video, "Statement Regarding Not Accepting Students," the comment section was filled with cries of lament:
"Teacher Kaido! My head is hard! Please give me one hit!"
"I've prepared ten medical teams, let me try!"
"Am I not worthy of learning Haki without a protagonist halo? *Sob sob*….."
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