Chapter 609: Riven's Movie Critiques and Yuko's Inexperience
Ichihara Yuko didn't fully comprehend the sheer, suffocating terror of Momobami Kirari in that specific state, but she understood one absolute truth: Kirari could be effortlessly kept in check by Shopkeeper Ren. That alone was enough. It was the only detail that truly mattered.
Still, a lingering curiosity tugged at her mind regarding the exact nature of that intense gaze. Just as she was turning the thought over, she caught Ren casually checking the time on his phone.
"Why are you checking the time?" she asked, her dark eyes tracking his movement.
Ren let out a soft breath, his expression relaxed. "How long do you think it takes to make Buddha Jumps Over the Wall?"
Yuko tilted her head, her dark hair cascading over her shoulder. "It's just boiling a bunch of premium ingredients together, isn't it? It should only take an hour or so..."
Ren smiled, a dry amusement dancing in his eyes, and slowly shook his head.
Yuko blinked, her elegant facade cracking into genuine puzzlement. "Does it really take that long to make?"
"It takes anywhere from two to four days."
"Oh..." Yuko paused, the words catching in her throat. "Huh?! Days?!"
Beside them, Riven looked equally horrified. The stoic warrior's eyes widened a fraction. A single dish requiring days of preparation? Such a concept was entirely alien to her.
Ren's smile deepened. "This is still relatively standard. Truly authentic chocolate demands an extensive amount of time to craft properly, as does duck confit, which can take two weeks or even longer to cure and cook."
Yuko swallowed hard, imagining the sheer patience required. "How many times did the chefs who invented these dishes have to fail before they finally succeeded? But... why exactly does Buddha Jumps Over the Wall take so many days?"
"Because the sheer volume of ingredients is staggering," Ren explained, his voice taking on the measured cadence of a master chef. "Many of the components need to be soaked, simmered, or cured two to four days in advance. When it finally comes time to assemble it, the cooking duration depends entirely on the base soup. The most luxurious, traditional version requires over ten hours just to extract the essence for the broth. However, that yields something far too rich and heavy for a casual meal, so a refined broth taking about four hours will be more than enough for us."
Yuko nodded slowly, absorbing the culinary lecture, but a sudden realization made her frown. "Wait... but... if you only start making it now, won't it be days before we actually get to eat it?"
"No," Ren replied, his tone gentle. "I already began the preparation phase long before Rindou and the others even arrived. Checking the time was just to ensure I finish the final steps right as Lucifer and the rest return. Don't worry. If I promised to make it for you, I will."
Yuko froze. A sudden, intense warmth bloomed in her chest, a sweet, fluttering sensation that completely bypassed her usual composed demeanor. A brilliant smile broke across her face, and without a second thought, she leaned forward and wrapped her slender arms securely around Ren's neck. She completely ignored the stunned Riven sitting just inches away.
Riven, for her part, made no move to leave. Why would she? This live display was infinitely more entertaining than the romance dramas she had been forced to endure.
The white-haired warrior clapped her hands together in a slow, deadpan rhythm. "Finally. I have witnessed it with my own eyes: the legendary, blinding display of public affection..."
Yuko chuckled, her cheek resting against Ren's shoulder. "Justice really does teach you all sorts of colorful vocabulary. But Riven, you seemed to be enjoying the show quite a bit just now."
"I have seen kissing scenes in movies," Riven replied, her tone perfectly flat. "But compared to what I just witnessed, the movies fall drastically short."
"Riven..." Yuko asked, pulling back slightly to look at the warrior. "Why on earth are you watching romance movies?"
Riven furrowed her brow, genuinely contemplating the question. "Justice told me it would improve my 'feminine charm,' so she assigned me a watchlist. The concept was somewhat interesting at first, but honestly, I feel like the male and female leads would be better off becoming celibate monks."
Ren raised an eyebrow, his curiosity piqued. "Why is that?"
"Because the male leads are invariably aloof or utterly incapable of basic communication, leading to endless misunderstandings. Meanwhile, the female leads are entirely unreasonable, prone to tantrums, and completely tsundere. A conflict that could be resolved in ten minutes with a simple conversation is artificially stretched into a two-hour ordeal. And after all that suffering, the grand finale is them merely holding hands..."
Yuko burst into laughter, nodding in absolute agreement. "Exactly! The main couple is never as good as the secondary male and female leads. The side characters actually get together quickly and cleanly. If it weren't for those two holding the plot together, the main couple would have broken up in the first act."
Riven nodded repeatedly, finding a kindred spirit in the dimensional witch. The two women fell into an easy rhythm of complaining about cinematic tropes. Riven had never been in love—she barely even grasped the fundamental concepts of romantic attraction or affection—yet she still firmly believed the fictional men were hopeless and the women were insufferable.
After a few minutes of lively critique, Yuko suddenly turned her attention back to Ren.
Ren met her gaze, his expression calm. "Yuko, what is it you want to say?"
Yuko offered a sly, affectionate smile. "Don't be nervous. I just wanted to give you a proper compliment. Shopkeeper Ren, you are a thoroughly carnivorous, shameless playboy! You're definitely nothing like those frustratingly pure high monks in the movies!"
Ren let out a quiet breath, shaking his head with a dry, helpless smile. "I actually wish you would praise me for something else."
"Something else?" Yuko tapped her chin, her dark eyes sparkling with mischief. "Hmm... Now that you mention it, I really don't know what else to praise you for... Let me think... Ah! I've got it! You are entirely worthy of me! I simply have impeccable taste in men!"
Riven stared at her blankly. "Yuko... you are just praising yourself now, aren't you?"
Yuko elegantly pretended not to hear the deadpan observation. Ren, meanwhile, let out a soft sigh and silently stood up from the sofa.
Yuko froze, her teasing demeanor vanishing in an instant. She quickly reached out, her fingers catching the fabric of his sleeve to pull him back. "Wait, are you angry?"
"It's two-twenty in the afternoon," Ren replied smoothly, glancing down at her. "It is time for me to go make the Buddha Jumps Over the Wall you have been obsessing over."
"You're really not angry?" Yuko pressed, her voice uncharacteristically small. "I just... I honestly couldn't think of the right words to praise you at that exact moment."
Ren's lips twitched upward. "Be careful, or you might not get to eat your portion of the soup."
Riven had been anticipating this moment for a while. She immediately stood up, ready to follow Ren into the kitchen. The stoic warrior harbored a deep, quiet curiosity about the complex, multi-day cooking process required for this legendary dish.
Yuko quickly slipped into her house slippers and trailed right behind him.
As Ren approached the hallway, he noticed the door to Nakiri Alice's room was wide open. The bright, melodic sound of girls laughing drifted out into the corridor.
He paused at the threshold. "Does anyone want to watch me make Buddha Jumps Over the Wall?"
"Shopkeeper Ren?!" four voices chimed in unison.
"I'm going!" they declared simultaneously.
Aside from Kobayashi Rindou, the four girls in the room practically scrambled over each other in their enthusiasm. To personally witness Shopkeeper Ren craft such a monumental, complex dish from the ground up was a phenomenally rare opportunity.
While the others rushed ahead, Rindou casually strolled over to Yuko, a wicked, knowing grin spreading across her feline features. "Hey, hey, what's wrong with you? Acting all anxious and well-behaved really isn't your style, Yuko."
Yuko let out a long, defeated sigh. 'The situation is roughly...' she thought, before quickly summarizing her minor panic over teasing Ren too far.
Rindou rolled her golden eyes, her tone dripping with exasperation. "You literally just finished complaining about those dramatic female leads in the movies, and now you're acting exactly like one? Have some common sense, alright? Do you seriously think Shopkeeper Ren would get upset over a tiny joke like that? Lucifer has said things a hundred times more outrageous to his face, and I've definitely pushed his buttons way more than you ever have."
Yuko rubbed her arms, looking away. "Do you think I wanted to act like that? I just... I don't have any actual experience with this sort of thing..." She blinked, suddenly realizing the hallway was empty. "Huh? Where did everyone go?"
"They already went downstairs to watch him make the soup," Rindou replied lazily.
"I want to go too!" Yuko declared, her elegant composure completely abandoned as she hurried toward the stairs.
"Oh? You're suddenly interested in the culinary arts?" Rindou teased, calling after her. "Right, I forgot this was the exact dish you ordered..."
"No! I'm just going to find Shopkeeper Ren!" Yuko's voice echoed back from the stairwell.
Rindou paused, shaking her head with a fond, amused smile. She took her time, unhurriedly making her way toward the stairs. As an Elite Ten chef, she already knew the general, grueling process of making Buddha Jumps Over the Wall, so there was no need to rush. Sprinting down there now would only reward her with the sight of gelatinous, soaking sea cucumbers.
As she walked, her thoughts drifted to the earlier conversation. 'Speaking of which... Kirari... that woman actually brought other people here? And someone with 'Kura' in their name? Unbelievable...'
"Rindou! Hurry up!" Yuko's voice snapped her out of her thoughts.
"Oh! Coming!" Rindou called back, quickening her pace to join the chaotic, lively kitchen.
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