(Akilah's pov)
The first thing I heard when I woke up was my holopad's relentless buzzing.
I groaned and buried my face deeper into my pillow.
The buzzing stopped.
For approximately three seconds.
Then it started again.
I reached blindly across my bedside table, knocking over the empty glass I had left there sometime during the night.
"Whoever you are," I mumbled into the pillow, "I hope you know you're ruining your chances of surviving today."
The buzzing continued.
I finally lifted my head.
Sunlight streamed through the narrow gap between my curtains, painting a bright strip across the floor. I squinted at the time displayed on my holoscreen.
10:07 a.m.
I stared at the numbers.
Ten in the morning.
I had slept far longer than I usually did.
Probably because my body was still recovering from the Vanguard Challenge.
I immediately grabbed the holopad.
"Hello?"
"FINALLY!"
I pulled the device away from my ear.
Nadira.
Of course.
"Good morning to you too."
"You've been ignoring me."
"I was sleeping."
"It's ten."
"I know."
"You slept until ten."
"Apparently."
There was silence.
Then she sighed dramatically.
"You're no fun."
I smiled despite myself.
"What do you want?"
"I was thinking."
I could hear the excitement in her voice.
"We haven't spent any time together."
That wiped the smile from my face.
She was right.
Between arriving at Veyloria, trying to figure out Kael, the Vanguard Challenge, the pendant, the Moon Goddess, Vespera, and everything else that had happened, I had barely given my best friend the attention she deserved.
"I know," I admitted quietly.
"So…"
"So?"
"Shopping."
I laughed.
"You're serious?"
"Very."
I glanced around my room.
A day away from everything sounded surprisingly appealing.
"Okay."
There was an excited squeal on the other end.
"Really?"
"Yes."
"Meet me downstairs in an hour and a half."
"Fine."
"Don't be late."
"You called me."
"Exactly. Now you can't forget."
She ended the call before I could respond.
I stared at the holopad.
Then I fell backward onto my bed.
For a few seconds, I stared at the ceiling.
Then my gaze drifted toward the mirror.
I still had yesterday's costume on.
The memory came back again.
The kiss.
My cheeks immediately heated.
I could remember the way his expression had changed.
For once, Kael hadn't looked angry.
He hadn't looked arrogant.
There had been something else in his eyes.
Something I hadn't been able to understand.
And the way he had touched me—
I stopped myself.
My face became even hotter.
"Stop."
I sat up.
"You are not doing this."
I marched toward the bathroom before my mind could betray me again.
But even while I showered, I couldn't stop thinking about him.
And that terrified me.
Because I was starting to realize that Kael wasn't simply someone I disliked.
He had become someone I couldn't stop thinking about.
By the time I met Nadira downstairs, I had managed to regain some control over myself.
At least I thought I had.
We left the academy grounds and made our way into the city.
The Lycarian capital was beautiful during the day.
Tall glass buildings rose between ancient stone structures, lanterns floated above the streets, and merchants filled the sidewalks with colorful displays.
Our first stop was a small boutique tucked between a jewelry shop and a bakery.
The moment Nadira walked inside, she gasped.
"Oh my goodness."
I laughed.
The store was packed with strange and beautiful things.
There were shelves of crystals, antique jewelry, handmade perfumes, old books, embroidered clothing, decorative daggers, miniature sculptures, glass bottles filled with colored sand, and countless little trinkets I couldn't identify.
"This place is amazing," Nadira said.
She disappeared toward a shelf of jewelry.
I wandered in the opposite direction.
That's when I saw it.
A bracelet.
It was simple.
Delicate silver links wrapped around two charms.
A small golden sun.
And beside it, a silver crescent moon.
I picked it up.
Something about it immediately caught my attention.
"It's beautiful, isn't it?"
I looked up.
An elderly woman stood behind me.
She had silver hair tied into a neat bun and kind eyes that seemed to carry decades of stories.
"Yes," I said.
She smiled.
"Would you like to try it?"
"Oh, I couldn't."
"Nonsense."
Before I could protest again, she gently took the bracelet from my hand and fastened it around my wrist.
I looked down.
The charms rested against my skin.
"They suit you."
I smiled.
"How much is it?"
She shook her head.
"Nothing."
"What?"
"It's a gift."
"I can't accept that."
"You can."
"But—"
She gently squeezed my hands.
"Some things find the person they're meant for."
I stared at her as she just smiled.
"And sometimes we don't need to understand why."
I didn't know what to say.
Eventually, I nodded.
"Thank you."
I noticed a navy-blue cap sitting on a nearby shelf.
"I'll buy that."
The woman laughed softly.
"If it makes you feel better."
"It does."
A few minutes later, Nadira returned carrying enough things to open her own shop.
"Look what I found!"
Then she noticed the bracelet.
Her eyes widened.
"Akilah!"
She grabbed my wrist.
"Where did you get this?"
"The woman gave it to me."
"She gave this to you?"
I nodded.
Nadira examined the charms.
"It's gorgeous."
The old woman smiled.
Before we left, she looked at me.
"Remember, child."
I paused.
"Yes?"
"The sun may burn brighter, but the moon has always known how to survive the darkness."
I frowned slightly.
The words felt strangely familiar.
But before I could ask what she meant, Nadira pulled me toward the door.
"Come on!"
I looked back once.
The woman was still smiling.
We visited several more shops before eventually collapsing into an ice-cream shop.
Nadira dropped her bags beside the table.
"My feet are dying."
I looked at her wedges.
"That's because you decided to wear those instead of sneakers."
She stuck her tongue out.
"You don't understand fashion."
"I understand footwear."
I took a spoonful of my raspberry and raisin-flavored ice cream. This was my favorite ice cream, everything else just tasted plain to me.
Nadira scrunched her nose, she hated it. She loved chocolate, which caused us to always argue about which flavor is the best.
Then, without thinking, I dabbed a little onto her nose.
She froze.
I froze.
Then we both burst out laughing.
"You did not!"
I laughed harder.
She grabbed a tissue.
"You are terrible," she said wiping her nose.
Then her expression softened.
"This is nice."
I smiled.
"Yeah."
"Us."
I looked down at my ice cream.
"I know."
She sighed.
"Ever since we got here, it feels like you've been somewhere else."
Guilt settled in my chest.
"I'm sorry."
She waved it off.
"It's okay."
But I knew it wasn't entirely okay.
I'd been so consumed by everything happening around me that I'd forgotten the one person who had always been there.
I looked at her.
"How have you been?"
She raised an eyebrow.
"Me?"
"Yes."
"What were you up to, during my time away? I know Eria was having a blast with Vanessa. I'm happy she found someone who understands her."
She laughed.
"Well since my best friend was on a mission. I had no choice but to spend my time mostly hanging around Eria and Vanessa."
"How was that?"
"Honestly speaking I felt like an outsider listening to two nerds talk. I barely understood anything they were saying."
I laughed.
She laughed too.
The conversation slowly faded.
I looked down at my melting ice cream.
My heart started pounding.
There was something I needed to tell her.
Something I'd been terrified to say.
"Nadira."
"Hm?"
"I found my mate."
She blinked.
"What?"
"I found my mate."
Her spoon stopped halfway to her mouth.
She stared at me.
I rushed forward.
"I wanted to tell you. I really did. It's just complicated, and he's an asshole, and—"
She raised one hand.
I stopped.
Then she started laughing.
Not a small laugh.
A full, uncontrollable laugh.
I frowned.
"What's funny?"
She wiped tears from the corners of her eyes.
"All this time…"
She laughed again.
"I thought maybe you didn't trust me anymore."
My expression softened.
"But it's because you found your mate?"
I nodded slowly.
Her smile disappeared.
She reached across the table and took my hands.
"Akilah."
I looked at her.
"You never have to hide something like that from me."
My throat tightened.
"I'm your best friend."
"I know."
"Whatever happens, I'm on your side."
I smiled.
"Thank you."
She squeezed my hands.
Then released them and picked up her spoon.
"So…"
She took another bite.
"Who's the asshole who stole my best friend?"
I rolled my eyes.
"Kael didn't steal anything."
"Who?"
"Kael."
She stopped eating her ice cream.
Her eyes widened.
"Kael?"
I nodded.
"Kael as in…"
"Yes."
"The Lycan prince?"
"Yes."
"The arrogant jerk?"
"Yes."
She stared at me.
Then burst out laughing again.
I glared.
"This isn't funny."
"It absolutely is."
"It's not."
"It really, really is," she continued laughing.
I poured a look at her completely amused by my current situation. She eventually calmed down and stopped laughing.
"Okay. Tell me everything."
So I did.
I told her about the orientation party.
The bond.
His refusal to accept me.
His claim that he would never be with a werecat.
My own attempt to reject him.
The way he had stopped me.
The challenge.
His possessiveness.
The argument about Taylor.
When I told her that we had kissed and that he basically made me scream his name while his finger was inside my vigina. I even told her that he licked the juice off his fingers calling it sweet. Her jaw dropped.
"You let Kael finger you? Honestly, I didn't even know you had it in you. As for Kael his nasty if you know what I mean," she said wiggling her brows.
I covered my face with my hands completely embarrassed.
"Please stop."
She laughed softly.
Then her expression became serious.
"I'm sorry."
"For what?"
"For not noticing how much you've been dealing with."
I shook my head.
"It's okay."
"No."
She squeezed my hand.
"You shouldn't have had to carry all of that alone."
I smiled.
"Water under the bridge."
We finished our ice cream and gathered our bags.
For the first time in days, I felt lighter.
Then my holoscreen buzzed.
I glanced down.
ALL VANGUARD MEMBERS REPORT TO THE TRAINING GROUNDS IMMEDIATELY.
I sighed.
Nadira frowned.
"What?"
"I have to go."
"Why?"
"Something about Vanguard."
She pouted.
"Already?"
I laughed.
"I'll meet you later."
I kissed her cheek before leaving.
Taylor was already waiting when I arrived.
He smiled the moment he saw me.
"Hey!"
He pulled me into a hug.
I laughed.
"Hi."
"How are you feeling?"
"Better."
He released me.
"So you know why we're here?"
"No."
He pointed toward the training grounds.
"Coach wants to speak with us."
I nodded.
"You went shopping," he asked looking at the bags in my hand.
"Yeah, Nadira wanted to hang out so we went shopping."
"Well next time don't forget about me," he said.
"Of course I won't," I said nudging his shoulder as he smiled at me.
At the corner of my eye, I could feel someone staring at me. I turned to look and that's when I saw him. Kael.
He stood near the far end with Darien and several other students.
My heart gave an irritating little jump.
I ignored it.
I lifted my hand in a small wave.
He looked at me.
Then looked away.
My hand slowly dropped.
What was that?
Before I could think about it, Coach Rhyder arrived.
"Good afternoon."
Everyone quieted.
"I hope you're enjoying your break."
A few students groaned.
He smiled.
"Because starting Monday, I'm going to work every one of you into the ground."
More groans.
He laughed.
"Congratulations to everyone who made the Vanguard."
Applause filled the grounds.
Then his expression became more serious.
"I called you here because I have to leave for the next week."
The students murmured.
"Don't worry. You won't be left without supervision."
He looked toward Kael.
"Instead, Kael will oversee your training."
Cheers erupted.
I clapped too.
Kael didn't react.
"His leadership skills during the coming week will determine whether he is suitable for team captain."
Kael nodded.
"I'll send you the training schedule. Again congratulations to those who made the team."
With that, the coach dismissed us.
Everyone began leaving.
Taylor and I said goodbye to each other before going our separate ways.
In the distance, I could see Kael walking away.
I hesitated.
Then followed him.
"Kael!"
He didn't stop.
I caught up.
"Hi."
A low hum.
I ignored his cold response.
"I just wanted to see if you're okay after what happened last night with, you know the pills. But don't worry I promise I won't tell…"
He stopped. Causing me to stop talking.
Slowly, he turned to look at me.
"Listen here and listen to me very clearly since you have a hard time comprehending things, what ever you saw in the bathroom was nothing so don't you ever bring it up again."
"I was just saying—"
"Stay out of my business."
"I wasn't trying to—"
His hand suddenly grabbed the front of my shirt.
My breath caught.
He pulled me closer.
His voice dropped.
"We aren't friends."
I stared at him.
"What?"
"Whatever happened last night…"
His expression hardened.
"…was nothing."
My stomach dropped.
He continued.
"You actually thought I kissed you because I wanted you?"
I couldn't speak.
A cruel smile appeared.
"You really are more desperate than I thought."
My chest tightened.
"I kissed you because I needed to distract you."
Every word cut deeper.
"You saw something you shouldn't have."
He leaned closer.
"So I gave you something else to focus on."
I stared at him.
He wasn't finished.
"You were so eager to believe it meant something."
His grip tightened.
"It was pathetic."
My eyes burned.
He released my shirt.
"Don't confuse a moment of convenience with something real."
Something inside me broke.
Then anger replaced it.
My hand moved before I could think.
Smack.
The sound echoed across the empty training grounds.
Kael's head turned.
For the first time, genuine shock crossed his face.
I stared at him, my palm burning.
"I knew you were an asshole."
My voice shook.
"But I didn't think you were cruel enough to use someone like that."
His eyes narrowed.
"You don't get to make me feel like I'm some pathetic little girl because I believed you."
I stepped closer.
"You are a monster."
He said nothing.
"Whatever hope I had for you…"
I swallowed.
"It's gone."
I turned away.
Then stopped.
I looked back at him.
"And whatever drugs you're taking?"
His expression changed.
"I hope they destroy you."
His eyes hardened.
"You'd be doing everyone a favor if you just stopped existing."
I walked away.
I didn't look back.
Not once.
By the time I reached the girls' dormitory, I could barely see through my tears.
I stood in front of a door knocking on it.
Eria opened it.
"Akilah?"
"Hi."
She immediately frowned.
"Where's Nadira?"
"Her room."
I nodded and walked past her.
I opened Nadira's door.
She was sitting on her bed, smiling at something on her holoscreen.
The moment she looked up, the smile disappeared.
"Akilah?"
I closed the door behind me.
My legs stopped working.
I slid down against the door.
And finally—
I broke.
The sob that escaped me was ugly.
Uncontrolled.
Everything I'd been holding inside came rushing out.
Nadira jumped from the bed.
"Akilah!"
She dropped beside me.
"What happened?"
I couldn't answer.
She pulled me into her arms.
I buried my face against her shoulder.
Eria entered behind us.
"What happened?"
"I don't know."
They didn't force me to speak.
They simply stayed.
Eventually, I managed to breathe.
Nadira wiped my tears.
"Tell me."
My voice cracked.
"Kael."
Her face hardened.
"What did he do?"
I told them what happened. Word for word.
The way he had called me desperate.
The way he said he'd only kissed me to distract me without telling them about the drugs I caught him with.
Silence filled the room.
Eria looked stunned. "He's your mate."
I nodded.
"And he treated you like that?"
I couldn't answer.
Nadira's anger was immediate.
She cupped my face.
"Listen to me."
I looked at her.
"You are Akilah."
Her voice was fierce.
"Princess of Felinara."
She wiped another tear from my cheek.
"No arrogant mutt gets to destroy your peace."
I laughed weakly through my tears.
"If he can't see how incredible you are," she continued, "then that's his loss."
Eria nodded.
"Exactly."
I looked between them.
For the first time since leaving the training grounds, I felt like I could breathe.
Nadira stood.
"Now stop crying."
I laughed softly.
"That's easier said than done."
"Go wash your face."
She pointed toward the bathroom.
"Then we're having a girls' night."
I nodded.
"Okay."
I stood and walked into the bathroom.
The door closed behind me.
I turned on the faucet.
Cold water ran over my fingers.
I splashed it onto my face.
Then I slowly raised my head.
My reflection stared back.
Red eyes.
Tear-stained cheeks.
A broken expression.
For a moment, I barely recognized myself.
Then I remembered Kael's words.
It was nothing.
You were desperate.
I only played with you.
My hands curled into fists.
Something inside me hardened.
If that was how he wanted to play…
Fine.
I could play too.
I wiped the remaining tears from my cheeks.
He wanted me to believe that the kiss meant nothing?
Fine.
I'd make sure he regretted ever making me believe it meant something.
I stared at myself in the mirror.
"Game on, Kael."