"Antonio," Ling asked, turning his gossip-fuelled curiosity toward Valencia, "why don't you like smiling? Since I joined the first team, I think I've only seen you smile four or five times."
The Manchester United veteran gave a helpless smile.
Valencia took football very seriously.
So seriously, in fact, that his expression rarely changed.
Over time, he had somehow earned the reputation of being "the unhappy one."
"Ling," Valencia said earnestly, "you're Manchester United's captain now. Remember what that means. Don't act impulsively like you did in the UEFA Super Cup final."
To be honest, Valencia thought Ling was already very mature.
Most of the time, he kept his emotions under control and acted with far more responsibility than his age suggested.
But sometimes, for reasons nobody could explain, he became a completely different person.
"That's not fair," Ashley Young immediately argued. "If everyone is as steady as a turtle, football loses its passion."
He leaned forward, getting more animated as he spoke.
"When Cantona was captain, when Keane was captain, the whole team had their stamp on it. Didn't those matches feel alive? Didn't they have fire?"
Valencia and Young soon began debating the meaning of captaincy with surprising passion.
Ling leaned back on the sofa, slowly sipping his drink, and enjoyed the rare leisure that came after a hard-earned trophy.
It was close to midnight when Ling finally got up to settle the bill.
After all, he was the highest-paid player at Manchester United and occupied a huge share of the club's resources.
Treating everyone once in a while was only fair.
Besides, every assist his teammates gave him was basically shining, beautiful money.
However, as he passed by the restroom, Ling noticed Daisy being held up by a strange man.
'Daisy?'
He was just about to step forward and ask what was happening when several other men moved into his path.
Then Ling saw the syringe on the sink.
In that instant, he understood.
Recently, he had seen reports about women in bars across the UK being maliciously injected with unknown substances.
The details had been horrifying enough that he remembered them clearly.
"Get lost," the leader of the group snapped.
He glanced around warily, then gestured for his accomplices to leave together.
Ling took a few steps back.
He was not stupid. Taking on six men alone was not simple, even for a professional footballer.
If any of them had knives, a single stab could be fatal.
'Calm down.'
"Everyone, over here!"
Ling shouted the way he would call for support on the pitch.
His voice cut through the music and carried across the bar, sharp enough to reach the Manchester United players instantly.
Whoosh!
That was what true execution looked like.
In the blink of an eye, the Manchester United players had gathered, blocking the group near the restroom.
The Manchester City players followed close behind.
On the pitch, they were opponents.
Off the pitch, if something serious happened, they would help if they could.
De Bruyne, at least, was not the kind of man to turn away.
"David, call the police first, then get the bar owner," Ling ordered calmly.
Most of De Gea's drunkenness vanished at once. He took out his phone and made the call.
The men, fuelled by alcohol and panic, recognized several of the footballers and suddenly became bold.
In their minds, public figures feared scandals, especially in a place like a bar where the truth could easily become muddy.
"I saw this young lady had too much to drink, so I was kindly helping her up."
"What's the meaning of this?"
"Get out of our way."
"And if any of you touch us, your careers are finished!"
The leader pushed Daisy forward slightly, signalling his accomplices to move.
Maguire's expression had already changed.
That was no surprise.
Seeing his own sister possibly drugged by a stranger—anyone would struggle to stay calm.
He grabbed the leader by the collar.
"You'll wait for the police," Maguire said through gritted teeth. "There are cameras here. Nobody is leaving."
For all his anger, Big Head Maguire was still trying to keep himself under control.
He knew the Champions League final was approaching. Starting a fight now would only create trouble for the club and his teammates.
If they were detained by police or dragged into damaging headlines, the consequences would reach far beyond this bar.
That was why he did not take justice into his own hands. He simply insisted on waiting for the police.
But the group clearly had other ideas.
The dim lighting, the alcohol, and the fear of being caught had brought out something ugly in them.
They slowly closed in around Maguire, and one of them picked up a beer bottle before swinging it hard at his head.
This was not a football.
It was glass!
Crack!
The sound of shattering glass seemed to silence the entire bar for a heartbeat.
Ling's sharp visual memory caught every detail: the burst of broken glass, the fragments scattering through the air, the blood streaming down Maguire's forehead.
Instantly, all his calm disappeared.
For Ling, the captain's responsibility was simple.
If a teammate was wronged, the captain was the first one in.
He grabbed a beer bottle from the nearby bar counter.
Then he stepped forward and charged.
First, he kicked down the man who had attacked Maguire. Then he smashed the bottle over another man's body and sent him stumbling back.
"Fuck!"
The Manchester United players, eyes red with fury, threw themselves into the fight.
It started quickly and it ended just as quickly.
Wan-Bissaka launched himself with the instincts of a full-back making a slide tackle, wiping one man clean off his feet.
David Luiz relied on raw physical confrontation, shoving another man down with terrifying force.
Kanté, despite his short body, was almost impossible to move once he got his balance, pinning one man down with surprising ease.
These alcohol-rotten idiots were no match for Premier League athletes.
Soon they were on the floor, groaning in pain.
A few tried to slip away during the chaos, only to be cut off by De Bruyne near the edge of the room.
Sterling and several City players helped hold them there until they stopped struggling.
"Didn't expect you to be that good in a fight," Ling said, giving De Bruyne a grateful look.
Many people would have stayed out of it. When someone helped, they deserved to be thanked.
"This is nothing. Back when I was at Genk—"
De Bruyne stopped mid-sentence.
Back then, Courtois had betrayed him, and when the two had met again later, De Bruyne had confronted him directly.
Courtois might have been twenty centimetres taller, but in a real fight, he had not been De Bruyne's match!
Of course, guilt may have played a part.
Ling wisely did not press further, though he could roughly guess what story had almost come out.
About fifteen minutes later, the police finally arrived.
Ling could not help grumbling inwardly.
So they were here to clean up after everything had already ended?
In the end, all three groups, including the bar owner, were taken to a London police station.
"They're professional footballers. We're Tottenham fans! We only said a few words, and they couldn't take it, so they started beating us."
"Your careers are over!"
"Damn Manchester fuckers!"
Just as Ling was preparing to give his statement, he heard the men start playing the victim first.
Oh, Tottenham fans?
Should have hit them harder, then.
...
Half an hour later, a reporter from The Sun appeared outside the police station.
Two hours later, Mourinho and Guardiola arrived with lawyers from both clubs.
What did it mean for Guardiola and Mourinho to face off?
It meant two men with a combined age of over a hundred staring at their players with the same helpless expression.
You lot really know how to cause trouble.
Ling explained the situation to both his own manager and his future father-in-law.
Guardiola listened with a dark expression.
"Maria already knows. You can explain it to her yourself later."
Mourinho's response was entirely different.
"Well done. That is how Manchester United players should act. But next time, notify me earlier."
Ling: "..."
Those answers were painfully in character for both of them.
It had to be said that the efficiency of the London police was so terrible it was almost beyond criticism.
There were witnesses, evidence, and surveillance footage, yet they still dragged the process out late into the night and even tried to take several players to a detention centre.
Manchester United's legal team refused immediately.
In fact, they nearly gave the London police a law lecture on the spot, arguing firmly that their clients had acted in self-defence and in defence of a potential victim.
Meanwhile, as the investigation continued, European football had already exploded.
📰 The Sun: Manchester Derby Chaos in London! United and City Stars Taken to Police Station After Late-Night Bar Brawl!
📰 The Sun: United Captain Jeremy Ling Accused of Assaulting Tottenham Fan — Champions League Final Place Now in Doubt?
📰 The Guardian: Harry Maguire's Sister Allegedly Targeted With Unknown Injection Before Players Intervened at London Bar
📰 Sky Sports: Manchester United and Manchester City Players Questioned by Police After Joint Bar Incident
📰 BBC Sport: Police Investigate London Bar Altercation Involving United and City Players Ahead of Champions League Final
📱 @ManUtd ✔
The club is aware of an incident involving several first-team players in London. We firmly believe our players acted in self-defence and in protection of others under threat. Manchester United will fully cooperate with the police investigation.
📱 @JorgeMendesOfficial ✔
Knowing Jeremy Ling's character, I do not believe he would ever involve himself in violence without serious cause. Polaris Sport's legal team has arrived in London. We will take legal action against any media outlet spreading baseless speculation.
📱 @City_Xtra ✔
Several Manchester City players were also present during the incident. Early reports suggest they assisted in preventing suspects from leaving before police arrived.
Football fans across the world were jolted awake by the news.
This was not a normal scandal.
Footballers getting into fights was hardly unheard of, but players from two clubs preparing to meet in the Champions League final being taken to the same police station after a bar brawl?
That was something else entirely.
📱 @UCLDramaHub ✔
Imagine the Champions League final being played by academy kids because both senior squads got detained after a bar fight. Football has officially lost its mind!
| ↳ 📱 @RedDevilWitness
| Reply: United's whole starting XI nearly got wiped out in one night. We survived City just to fight London nightlife.
| ↳ 📱 @CityBlueLogic
| Reply: City only had a few involved. Tactical discipline even in a police incident. Pep's structure is unmatched.
📱 @NeutralFCFan ✔
The video is wild. Ling saw Maguire bleeding and went full captain mode. Not saying it was smart, but I understand it.
| ↳ 📱 @LingEra7
| Reply: Say what you want, but he protected his teammate and Maguire's sister. That's my captain. 🔴
| ↳ 📱 @LegalBallTalk
| Reply: The big issue is whether the FA or UEFA gets involved. Police fines are one thing. Suspensions before the final would be massive.
📱 @SpursLad_1882
Why are Tottenham fans catching strays in a Manchester bar brawl? We didn't even play and still got dragged into the mud!
| ↳ 📱 @UnitedMemeFactory
| Reply: You lost the moral high ground the second someone said "Tottenham fans."
📱 @KanteHive ✔
Kanté helping pin someone down after saving the FA Cup final yesterday. This man covers every blade of grass and apparently every bar exit too.
📱 @FootballAfterDark ✔
United win the FA Cup, City lose the final, both teams end up at the same bar, then the Champions League final build-up turns into a crime documentary. Scriptwriters are doing too much!
...
The next day, Jeremy Ling and his teammates walked out of the police station, yawning one after another.
Manchester United and Manchester City both had powerful legal teams.
The men involved in the original incident were charged with offences including affray and sexual assault-related misconduct, and several of them were likely facing months behind bars.
As for Ling and his teammates, each player received different treatment depending on his involvement.
Most of them were given fines, while the lawyers continued pushing back against anything more serious.
"Let's go," Ling said, draping his jacket over his shoulder as he led the Manchester United players toward the bus.
"Think of it as a unique trophy celebration. Probably the only one of its kind in football history."
In the end, they still took the club bus back to Manchester.
Exhausted, bruised, fined, half-famous for heroism and half-famous for violence—but still FA Cup champions!
---------
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