Yellow Diamond stared at the screen in silence for several minutes. A heavy sigh echoed through the yellow sector, where only a single Pearl remained—accustomed to her Diamond's solitude and her moments of contemplation.
"Is something wrong, my Diamond?" the Pearl asked in a soft voice, as if knowing that any interruption might shatter something delicate inside her Diamond.
"Sing for me, Pearl," Yellow Diamond replied calmly, yet with a trace of fatigue she couldn't hide.
"Understood, my Diamond," Pearl said, preparing herself for what felt more like a ritual than a song.
"Almost all of us know how to care... but few of us know how to love. To love is to suffer and to enjoy..."
LOL, just kidding, that was bait—she sang normally.
A silence followed, heavy and almost tangible. But the melody that actually came from Pearl had no lyrics; everything before had been a joke. Pure harmony filled the room without the need for words. Explicit feelings weren't present here, but emotions existed in ways that could neither be touched nor named.
And yet, Yellow Diamond was feeling far too much.
Now, Yellow Diamond's internal dialogue—a monologue where only Pearl listened without interrupting—centered on her nostalgia for Blue Diamond and Pink:
Why does Blue allow herself these reprieves? Yellow thought as her gaze swept across the coordinates on the display. Blue... Blue misses Pink too much.
I know it. I feel it in every decision she makes, in every pause she takes, in every mistake she commits. And yet, she pushes forward, as she always does—carrying her pain in silence, bearing her guilt, her desperation.
I miss her too. Pink... always Pink. Though I never admitted how much, though I never wept over her absence, her memory follows me. Blue feels it too, and somehow, that helps me understand that my duty isn't just to keep the Empire in order, but to keep her grounded. Because if Blue breaks, everything breaks. If Blue loses herself in her grief, then whatever is left of Pink—whatever we have left of her—is lost as well.
Perhaps this trip to Earth... perhaps this mission taking her away from her responsibilities for a while... can grant her something we never allowed her to feel: freedom. Freedom to think, to remember, to live, even if only for an instant without the shadow of the Empire over her shoulders.
I can't help but ask myself... why does she remember so much? Why does Pink weigh so heavily on her mind? Is it my fault? Is it all our fault? I never fully understood how loving someone means carrying the memory of another being, yet she does it.
Blue does it. She always has. And I... I must support her. Even if it means admitting that, for millennia, I have been so rigid that I forgot what it means to feel.
Her Pearl said nothing, as always. She simply listened, allowing the thoughts to flow and the silence to speak. She asked no questions and offered no opinions; her presence was enough to hold the emptiness within her Diamond, allowing those thoughts to expand without judgment.
Am I doing enough for her? I wonder if this trip will help her. If it will help her hold together, so she doesn't break completely under her grief. Because I know Pink is the cause and the reminder of everything, and even so... Blue pushes forward.
I must guide her. I must ensure her decisions do not destroy her, that her mourning does not turn into defeat. If Blue falls, the Empire falls. If the Empire falls, then Pink... our Pink... will never rest in peace.
She sighed.
She looked at the screen again, adjusting ships, verifying routes, and managing resources. All the while thinking of her, thinking of Blue, of Pink, and of what it means to keep what little remains intact. Perhaps this trip to Earth isn't just strategically useful... perhaps it's also a small gift, a breather, a way to let Blue move forward without me intervening too much.
Because sometimes, even a Diamond must remember that not everything can be controlled, not everything can be ordered. Some moments must simply be felt, even if only in silence.
And as Pearl's harmony continued to fill the room, Yellow Diamond allowed a less rigid thought to cross her mind for the first time in centuries:
Maybe... maybe understanding Blue isn't a weakness. Maybe accepting her pain and giving it a space to exist without judging her is my true duty. Because if Blue holds together, then we can all hold together.
And even if no one else knew—not even a human voice could testify to it—her Pearl listened. She knew she did; even without speaking, she could read her Diamond's thoughts through her subtle gestures alone, and that was enough.
"Yes, my Diamond," Pearl responded with her usual calm, slightly bowing her head.
Yellow Diamond sighed and lowered her gaze.
"Am I... am I bad?" she whispered, as if putting it into words hurt more than any battle or strategic decision.
Pearl remained silent, her gaze steady and serene.
"Again, my Diamond?" she asked finally, raising an eyebrow with that blend of patience and curiosity she always displayed toward her.
"You are the only one I can confide in," Yellow said, her voice low yet heavy with sincerity.
Pearl flashed a haughty smile, as though knowing that this moment belonged solely to her Diamond.
"You are not bad, my Diamond. You follow every imperial directive to the letter, and if you were... well, then the Empire itself would be the true villain," she said firmly, reminding her that duty and morality do not always walk the same path.
Yellow Diamond buried her face in her hands in frustration.
"The Empire is bad... and yet... I remain a part of it," she murmured, her shoulders tense and her voice laden with conflict.
She looked at her Pearl once more.
"So... what do I do? Aside from going to the zoo later... what else should I do?"
Pearl rested a hand on her chin, lost in thought, her eyes sweeping across the room as if searching for answers in the quiet itself.
"For now, continue as always with White Diamond's orders. Though she has given us no indication of acceptance or approval—only pointing out that Blue has been somewhat inactive with her White Pearl—that does not mean we can step out of line... but we can organize what we need before the journey."
"Organize..." Yellow muttered as her mind returned to the endless checklist of strategic requirements.
"Yes, my Diamond," Pearl said, stepping a bit closer and lowering her voice as if sharing a secret. "We will deploy a few Agates to the new colonies to serve as an extraction base, and some Lapis Lazulis to terraform certain planets. We need these worlds to be habitable before we send the Peridots. Furthermore, additional Peridots are necessary to upgrade our rapid exploration vessel so we can respond to any eventuality without relying solely on Blue or White."
Yellow Diamond nodded slowly, processing the information.
"Good. The Agates will go first, then the Lapises... and finally the Peridots. Agreed." Her voice sounded firmer now, though still carrying an underlying trace of internal doubt.
"My Diamond," Pearl whispered, her voice barely grazing Yellow's ear, "we must also consider that Blue Diamond is still in conflict. We cannot overburden her with our strategy. If something fails, she will suffer... and so will we. Therefore, our steps must be measured, precise, and unhurried."
Yellow Diamond took a deep breath and leaned back into her massive seat, her hands resting on the armrests of her throne.
"It is difficult, Pearl. Blue... Blue misses Pink so much... and I miss her too. But I must fulfill what is in my hands right now. If Blue remains steadfast, then we can keep the Empire intact."
Pearl remained quiet, nodding gently, understanding every nuance of her Diamond without the need for words. Her presence alone was enough to anchor the storm of thoughts and responsibilities Yellow had accumulated over centuries.
"Then," Yellow continued, looking toward the main display, "prepare the Agates first, then the Lapis Lazulis for the terraforming planets, and finally the Peridots for the ship. Everything in that exact order, with no margin for error. Leave nothing out."
"Yes, my Diamond," Pearl answered in a firm, controlled voice, executing each command with precision as she operated the panels and coordinates to ensure everything was ready for the voyage.
Yellow sighed once more, looking out at the vastness of space through the screen. Her thoughts returned to Blue and Pink, and for a fleeting moment, she allowed nostalgia and memory to grant her strength. She couldn't change the past, but she could control what remained of the future.
End of Chapter 74.