When Kairen heard this, he instantly got angry and cursed,
"I wouldn't want you even if you gave yourself to me for free. I think Sasuke just ignores you because your chest is too small."
"You—" Sakura stared daggers at Kairen.
Kairen didn't care about her glare at all.
In his previous life he never liked Sakura, even though her manga ranked near the top in Naruto.
Kairen read every one, but deep down he still didn't like that kind of woman.
Naruto chased you for over 600 episodes and still didn't catch you.
This kind of thing—idol dramas don't dare to write it.
Thinking of this, anger rose in Kairen's heart, and he truly felt it wasn't worth it for Naruto.
He ordered Deidara, "Quick, carry the Nine-Tails brat over here."
Deidara was puzzled. "Why?!"
"To make a match."
"Oh?!"
Deidara didn't understand, but still obediently dragged Naruto over.
Naruto glared at Kairen and cursed, "What are you trying to do?"
Kairen patted his face. "The most important secret to chasing girls is having thick skin. As long as your skin is thick enough, there's no wall corner you can't pry, no couple you can't split."
"What are you trying to do?" Naruto kept questioning.
Kairen controlled Sakura to lie on the ground, and slowly used a force field to float Naruto up.
Sakura widened her eyes and kept cursing at Kairen,
"Bastard, what are you doing?"
"Shut up!"
Kairen snorted, then instantly stacked Naruto on top of Sakura and even made the two of them kiss.
The positioning was controlled very well: it left them enough space to breathe, yet also let them kiss each other.
Sakura's eyes were wide, and so were Naruto's.
The two looked into each other's eyes, and each held the other's bacteria in their mouths.
The people of Konoha also widened their eyes—especially Kakashi, whose dead eyes were about to roll white.
Kairen clapped his hands and smiled.
"I've already thought of your future kids. The boy will be called Uzumaki Pinchu, and the girl will be called Uzumaki Hina."
"Alright, no need to thank me. In another hour the genjutsu can be lifted. I wish you a pleasant time being affectionate."
"Deidara, let's go!"
"Okay!"
"Woof! Woof! Woof!"
Deidara picked up Inuzuka Kiba's dog.
"Show go, follow me from now on!"
Inuzuka Kiba was full of rage. "Bastard, give my dog back to me."
Deidara patted his head. "A prisoner still has so many demands. Not chopping off your head is already my mercy."
He summoned a clay bird, jumped up with Kairen, and the two waved at the people of Konoha before flying away.
After Kairen and Deidara left,
Naruto and Sakura still maintained their original posture.
Sakura crazily signaled Naruto with her eyes, telling him to move away.
Naruto responded with his eyes as well, indicating that he couldn't move.
Kakashi's eyes looked at the Make-Out Paradise that had fallen on the ground, then glanced at the man and woman stacked together.
"Naruto, if this still doesn't work, then in the future you can read books with me and get by."
Naruto didn't know what kind of feelings he had in his heart.
There was excitement—after licking for so many years, he finally got to taste the other person's bacteria; of course that was exciting.
There was worry—Sakura's monster-strength punches weren't for show.
There was guilt—he always felt a bit sorry toward Sasuke, whom he had been chasing after.
And there was a little sense of responsibility—don't worry, Sakura, I'll take responsibility for you in the future.
...
The light screen in the sky changed, now playing the scene of Sasuke facing off against Itachi.
At the same time, a piece of news was inserted.
A Kairen in a suit was holding a script and reading inside it: "Recently, our station discovered that the Nine-Tails jinchūriki of Konoha, Naruto Uzumaki, and the direct disciple of the Fifth Hokage, Haruno Sakura, actually hugged and embraced in public, and even kissed passionately..."
There was also an attached photo: a picture of Naruto holding Sakura and kissing her deeply.
These days the internet had only been launched yesterday; nobody understood any PS technology, so everyone believed it.
Far away in Sunagakure, Hinata saw it, fell silent, and finally smiled. "Naruto has also found his happiness."
[Ino: "What's going on with Wide Forehead? Didn't she like Sasuke?"]
[Konohamaru: "Naruto is awesome—he finally hooked this girl."]
Sasuke was staring down Itachi!
Hearing the anchor's words, he froze for a moment. Sakura and Naruto were together?
What's going on?
Sasuke quickly stopped thinking about it. Anyway, he wasn't interested in women. He continued to focus on the great cause of cutting down his brother.
Deidara carried Kairen as they flew into the sky, and the two quickly reached the ancient Uchiha clan lands.
From below came the sounds of Fire Release burning and shuriken flying—it was Sasuke live-streaming cutting down his brother.
Deidara rubbed Akamaru's dog head and asked Kairen,
"What's there to care about with those two?"
Kairen smiled. "What I care about isn't the two brothers, but Orochimaru in Sasuke's neck. The empire has just been founded; I need a talent like Orochimaru to join the Eastern Bureau."
Deidara snorted. "Orochimaru cannot be controlled. Be careful."
Kairen said indifferently, "I'm actually looking forward to him having that ability."
Kairen noticed Akamaru—dog tears filled its eyes, as if begging Kairen to send it back.
Kairen's heart softened immediately, and he criticized Deidara:
"You went and took someone else's dog like this. The person and dog still have unfinished feelings—you can't split them up!"
"Woof! Woof! Woof! (๑ت๑)" Akamaru nodded happily.
Kairen snatched Akamaru back and weighed it.
"Not light at all! Deidara, start a fire and boil some water."
"Woof! ◝₍ᴑ̑ДO͝₎◞"
...
When the Rinnegan genjutsu wore off, Sakura blasted Naruto into the sky with a single punch.
Naruto relied on Shadow Clones in midair to land steadily.
He shamelessly approached Sakura, who was dry-heaving nonstop, and said shyly,
"Sakura, I didn't mean to, but don't worry! I'll take responsibility for you."
Sakura glared at Naruto. "In your dreams. I'll never talk to you again for the rest of my life."
After she finished speaking, she used a few Body Flickers and left, leaving only Naruto behind, still trying to keep her.
"Sakura! Sakura!!"
Kakashi patted the dust off the little dirty book and slowly approached.
Naruto was a bit heartbroken. "Kakashi-sensei, Sakura won't talk to me anymore."
Having read dozens of little dirty books, Kakashi considered himself a veteran in matters of love and spoke right away:
"Don't worry! Sakura is just saying that in anger!"
"You've been kissing for a whole hour!"
"Kakashi-sensei, really?"
"Of course it's true. Come, read this book a bit more—there are many techniques for teasing girls in it."
"Oh!"