Before making his way to his room for a well-earned period of rest - at least until his next inevitable call-up - Starshoulder made his way to the Captain's office. Knocking on the door, he heard the Captain's phlegmy voice call out in response.
"Come in."
Pushing the door open, Starshoulder entered the office. The Captain sat at his desk, his three-pointed hat on top of his bare head and a jellyfish floating at his shoulder. He was surveying a strange object on his desk that looked like a leaf, wrapped in vines. For a second, he swore that it twitched, but he put that up to his tired mind.
Also, he honestly couldn't be bothered to care.
The Captain finally looked up, noticing Starshoulder, and recoiled in a similar way to Trianglechest.
"Gletrious have her way and gargle you out, Starshoulder. Ever heard of a shower?"
"Gurgle blurgle."
The jellyfish added, and the Captain nodded.
"Yeah, you're right. His suit was white before. And is that...oil? Or something else? You know what, I don't even care. Give me the good news, Starshoulder, how soon can we get off this godforsaken rock?"
Starshoulder, who had simply been standing there taking it in silence, finally had a chance to respond with a tired sigh.
"Well, if I had it my way we would wait for at least another week before even attempting to leave."
Raising his hands pre-emptively to placate the Captain who was already rearing up for another tirade, he continued quickly.
"But, if it's really that serious, then there's nothing holding us back. Just, give me a day to sleep. I'll need to be in the Engine Room while we're taking off and travelling just in case it decides to have another tantrum."
Captain Resquilatron furrowed his brows, calculating several variables in his mind. I'm just kidding, he just wanted to look cool.
"Fine. Only because you look like Great Gratches pooped you out and then Gletrious slobbered all over you."
Before leaving, Starshoulder hesitated. Eventually, he decided to just go out and say it.
"Captain, that anomaly. Was it...you know?"
The room chilled, despite the sunlight shining in through the window. Fixing Starshoulder with the full weight of his gaze, any bluster and frivolity fell away, leaving behind an empty void that was rarely seen. He spoke hoarsely, in a low voice.
"Does it matter if it was? You of all people should know, that it is my business alone to deal with."
Instinctively touching the black star on his chest, the opaque visor masked Starshoulder's expression. Holding the Captain's heavy gaze for a few more seconds, he shook his head lightly and left without another word.
Hearing his receding footsteps disappear down the hall, the Captain slouched back in his chair, his previous air of hollowness melting away.
"Glurgle. Blurgle wurgle?"
"No, this was the right move," Captain Resquilatron shook his head. "Out of all of them, Starshoulder is the one with the most skin in the game. You really think the others didn't notice? The reason they didn't say anything is-well."
The faces of his crewmembers ran through his mind.
"Trianglechest is too cowardly and turned a blind eye. Squareface at least understands that there is nothing he can do. Circleface, well, even if he understood he wouldn't care."
"Glurgle," the jellyfish warned, waving its tentacles through the air. "Hurgle."
"I'm not underestimating Circleface, I know he gets more than he lets on. But when it comes to this, it's...hard for him. He was as close to him as Starshoulder."
The Captain couldn't help but sigh, the fading image of a crewmember he had not seen in a while flashed through his head. Already, its face was fuzzy, the memory eroded by time. Only the black star on his chest remained clear.
The same black star on the suit that Starshoulder now wore. Shaking his head, the Captain brushed away the melancholic thoughts with his characteristic brutishness. He turned his attention back to the object on his desk: the original anomaly they had found on that planet.
Huh? You don't remember? You are an insult to the miracle of life that created you. Let me so magnanimously remind you, since I recently destroyed a planet and am in a satisfied mood:
The leaf of cabbage, deposited to Jeffbob from his ancient deal with Universal Auto Coverage, that he almost ate before being teleported away to Unitopia, subsequently being sealed away by the Captain and his crew upon their crash-landing onto the red planet.
The thing-detector was placed on the desk next to the anomaly, concluding its analysis. It had given him a preliminary result, pointing the way to his unassuming prey. But it had been surprisingly opaque to more detailed study. As if a veil was obfuscating it, preventing any from trying to gain insight. Strangely, it felt the veil was damaged, or weakened, and Captain Resquilatron was not willing to let such an opportunity pass by.
And so, he let the thing-detector calculate, the loading symbol stuttering along.
"Never before, has it seen something and taken this long," he spoke grimly. "What secrets does it hold so tightly, so unwilling to give up?"
His voice warped into malevolent exuberance.
"I will tear it from your non-consenting grasp! For none in the galaxy dare to resist the might of Captain Resquilatron Ooglespooglesburgh the Thousand and Oneth! None who wish to live!"
It must be noted that the Captain was currently addressing his impromptu speech at a leaf of cabbage. The jellyfish could not shake its head or palm its forehead, so it satisfied itself with a condescending wiggle of its bulbous body, though the Captain was too absorbed in his monologue to noticed.
Only a sharp trill jolted him from his self-indulgent fantasies about ruling the galaxy and subjecting his enemies (and certain, annoying members of his crew) to increasing entertaining methods of torture. He had reached a particularly enjoyable one where he was forcing them to juggle bananas while reciting the Qwalulor national anthem that involved lots of guttural spitting.
As such, he pressed the button on the rusted, taped-together tablet angrily.
"What!"
He spoke before the hologram had a chance to sputter into existence. When it did, and the blurry figure could just about be made out, his demeanour changed. Leaning forward, an intelligent glint in his eyes usually hidden away came to light.
Even the jellyfish leaned closer, awaiting what the figure had to say. When it spoke, it was in a voice more like machine than man, devoid of emotion.
"We did not achieve complete success, however, we found a successful trace."
"So," the Captain interrupted impatiently. "Where did it lead?"
The figure replied coldly, a glint of light visible behind his right eye, though it was hard to see with the low quality of the transmission.
"New Ithaca."
The Captain paused, processing the words. Then a low rumbling sound came from him, transforming into a harsh laugh that tore from deep within his throat.
"Very well! So be it! This is a far better plan than before anyways. Make your way there immediately, be sure that you are not noticed. We will arrive soon, along with a few juicy surprises."
The hologram, uncaring of the Captain's tirade, nodded robotically.
"Understood."
The figure cut the call, and the Captain looked down at the thing-detector, its loading symbol just filling up at that moment, sounding out with a satisfying ding. Rubbing his hands together gleefully, he mumbled.
"It's all coming up Resquilatron today, eh? Those guys are in for a nasty surprise."
Even the jellyfish, usually rather immune to the Captain's nature, found itself being drawn along by his malicious enthusiasm.
"Wurble. Glurble."
"Burble."
The sounds of the strange gurgling and the Captain's evil laughter echoed throughout the ship, though they were all so used to it they hardly noticed. Only Squareface groaned, covering his masked face with a pillow.
His specific nature granted him a particularly unique type of foresight related solely to himself. Particularly, about his mental state. And, in that moment, he saw for absolute certain what lay ahead.
Only the bleak, empty void of depression.
"Well, nothing new there."
He turned off his higher thought and went to sleep.
***
Far from that noisy ship on that red planet, on a cold and desolate vessel in orbit about a luscious green and blue moon, with the click of a button a call ended.
The hologram of the Captain and Xuez'Xkzaek'xtrik disappeared, returning the deck to silence. A single figure, enveloped in ominous shadow, operated the computer with machine-like efficiency.
The figure wore a similar suit to the rest of the crew members, of the white variety, though he wore no helmet. In the darkness, his visage could not be discerned. Only a single detail stood out: an eyepatch covering his right eye.
More notable was the symbol that marked it, manifested onto the dark eyepatch. A symbol that struck fear into the hearts of all of Captain Resquilatron's crew.
A hexagon.
With a final press of a button, the ship engaged its hyper-drive, settling into a superluminal cruise, leaving that moon behind. The hexagon flashed softly green for a moment, fracturing into something geometric and precise beyond comfort, a million calculations taking place in a few seconds. Just as quickly, it stopped, having reached some final conclusion. Filing that information away, the figure remained in silent vigil like an idling system, surveying the hyperspace passing by.