"So, why did Yukari even bring you here?" I asked Miku, stepping over a stray piece of rubble as we walked down the quiet street.
"Well..." Miku trailed off, her eyes drifting upward as her voice faded into recollection.
[Flashback]
Inside the pitch-black void of Yukari's gap, absolute chaos was unfolding. Flandre and Ruby were darting through the air, laughing like maniacs while blasting apart anything within line of sight. Remilia sat at a small, pristine table amidst the floating debris, casually sipping red tea and ignoring the explosions around her. Meanwhile, Miku stood a few feet away, practically drooling as she stared intently at a stolen photograph of me.
"...Yeah, no. I'm way too old for this," Yukari muttered, pinching the bridge of her nose.
Sighing, she opened a fresh gap in the fabric of space, intending to step through and join me. Before she could take a single step, however, a stray, brightly glowing danmaku bullet ricocheted off a floating eye and smacked Yukari square in the side of the head.
Silence fell over the gap. Yukari's eye twitched.
"...ALRIGHT!" Yukari roared, her aura exploding into a terrifying purple haze as she whipped around to face the little troublemakers.
Seeing the yukari distracted by Ruby and Flandre, Miku's eyes lit up. Without a second thought, she sprinted at top speed and dived headfirst through the open gap.
[End of Flashback]
"Ah... Okay then," I said, a sweatdrop forming on the back of my neck.
Before I could ask anything else, Miku lunged forward and grabbed my arm in a vice grip, dragging me toward the towering glass entrance of the local shopping mall.
"You owe me for this!" she declared, flashing a mischievous grin.
Oh no... I thought, my soul practically leaving my body.
What followed was less of a casual shopping trip and more of an organized rampage. Miku casually used her mind control on the retail staff and shoppers, causing them to happily hand over high-end merchandise for free. We hit a clothing boutique, a luxury makeup store, a designer bag shop, and three different shoe outlets in less than an hour.
"Hurry up, Sakuya! I think this dress would look adorable on you, don't you think?" Miku squeaked, holding up a frilly, crimson-trimmed outfit in front of my face.
"Please, Miku... can we rest?" I wheezed, buried under a mountain of shopping bags, boxes, and garment racks. "I'm literally carrying the entire mall!"
"Oh, wait here!"
She snapped her fingers. Within seconds, a small army of hypnotized retail workers marched out of the storefronts, bowing politely as they relieved me of the massive stack of items and began carrying them for us.
"Really?" I deadpanned.
"Yes! Now go try this on!" she squealed with glee, shoving me into the fitting room.
After being forced into a endless montage of outfits and claiming every single one we finally exited the mall and headed straight toward a nearby luxury hotel. Miku skipped up to the front desk, flashed a brief hypnotic light in the clerk's eyes, and secured the keycard to the grand penthouse suite completely free of charge.
"I am so amazing, it almost terrifies me," Miku said dramatic pose, striking a theatrical posture in the middle of the opulent living room.
"Yeah, yeah... You're amazing," I sighed, collapsing onto the nearest plush sofa.
Miku instantly snapped her head toward me, her eyes locked on target. "Ara ara... You finally praised me!"
Before I could react, she lunged across the room, tackling me into the cushions and wrapping her arms tight around my waist.
"Let go! Your hey! Let go!" I yelled, struggling as her hands began aggressively tugging at my shirt buttons.
"Don't run away, we aren't done yet~!" she giggled, leaning in closer.
Before she could take things any further, I focused my mind, stopped time for a fraction of a second, and teleported across the room to safety.
"Aww~" she pouted, flopping face-down onto the sofa.
Meanwhile, in an alleyway on the other side of the city...
A dusty blue interface screen flickered to life in front of a teenage boy wearing an overly dramatic trench coat.
[ MISSION: Eliminate the Anomaly]
Target: A person who does not belong in this world.
Location: Last seen near Gold Star Hotel.
[ Reward: 10,000 System Points, +30 Free Attribute Points.]
"Finally, a real mission!" the boy said with a dark, confident grin, cracking his knuckles as he checked his newly upgraded stats. "Time to show this world who the main character is."
He failed to notice the gap filled with floating, blood-red eyes quietly opening in the shadows directly behind his head.
"Ara ara~ Found you," Yukari whispered smoothly from the darkness, a deadly smile curling across her lips before the gap snapped shut without a sound.
Back in the penthouse suite, I was still catching my breath after escaping Miku's grasp when a strange chime echoed in my ears.
"Eh!?"
A translucent, glowing window manifested right in front of my face.
[EMERGENCY MISSION: Eliminate the Self-Insert]
[Reward: The legendary all-powerful Cirno, plus an endless supply of Touhou Fumos...]