Chapter 11: Blackout, Voices, and the Universe's Personal Vendetta Against My Naps
... Uuuuuuuuuun.
This is it. This is how I die. Not from the stalker's claws, not from Rena's lectures, not even from running (which is already a crime against my existence), but from some ancient cursed crown deciding my skull is the perfect vacation spot.
The world spun like a drunk *kurukuru* top. One second I was being dragged through the guild hall by Rena's iron grip, the next everything went red-black-white in a nauseating cycle. Voices that weren't voices pressed into my brain like unwelcome guests who forgot to wipe their feet.
"Vessel… incomplete…"
"Anchor… adjusting…"
"Run…!"
The last one sounded almost… worried? No. Impossible. Ancient artifacts don't do worried. They do ominous, they do dramatic, they do "congratulations you're now a walking apocalypse," but worried? That's new. And terrifying.
I tried to say something clever like "Please stop using my head as a radio," but all that came out was a pathetic groan. My legs gave up completely. Gravity won again. As usual.
"Lairn!" (Rena)
Her voice cut through the static like a sword through butter. Strong hands caught me before my face could renew its friendship with the floor. Again. For the hundredth time today. At this rate my nose might file for divorce.
I cracked one eye open. The room was spinning, but Rena's face was right there, close enough that I could see the little worry line between her eyebrows. Cute. Annoying. Both at once. How does she do that?
"Don't… don't you dare black out properly." (Rena)
"Too late… already halfway to dreamland…" I mumbled. "Tell the crown… I want a refund…"
The crown in my bag pulsed again, warmer this time. Almost apologetic? No. I'm hallucinating. Definitely hallucinating.
Therin's voice boomed somewhere above us. "Iris! Suppression field, now!"
White light flooded the room. Iris's staff glowed like an angry moon. The pressure in my skull eased—just enough for me to remember how breathing worked.
I slumped against Rena's shoulder. She smelled like rain and steel and that weird herbal soap she always uses. Comforting. I hated how comforting it was.
"This is the worst nap I've ever had." (Lairn)
"You're not napping, you idiot." (Rena)
"Feels like napping…"
She flicked my forehead. Lightly. But still. Rude.
The pulsing slowed. The voices faded into background static. I managed to sit up properly, though the world still wobbled like it had drunk too much mana wine.
Therin stood over us, arms crossed, looking like he'd aged ten years in ten minutes. Hallen was by the window, spear ready, peering out at the chaos still unfolding in the streets.
"Status." (Therin)
Iris lowered her staff, breathing hard. "The external link is severed… for now. But whatever is calling the crown—it's close. And powerful."
I rubbed my temples. "Great. Just what I needed. A demonic pen pal."
Rena helped me to my feet. Her hand lingered on my arm a second longer than necessary. I pretended not to notice. She pretended she wasn't checking if I was about to collapse again.
Outside, the alarm bells kept ringing. Shouts. Steel clashing. Occasional explosions that sounded suspiciously like guild mages doing their dramatic thing.
Hallen turned from the window. "Two more stalkers sighted near the east gate. They're not attacking randomly. They're searching."
"Searching for me." (Lairn)
Everyone looked at me. Even the crown felt like it was looking at me.
I sighed the longest sigh in human history. "Of course they are. Because my life is a comedy where the punchline is always 'Lairn gets chased.'"
Rena's expression softened. Just a fraction. The kind of soft that makes my chest do stupid things. "We're leaving. Now. The escort plan is accelerated."
"Accelerated how?" I asked, already dreading the answer.
"Full escort. Hallen, two mages, and us. We cut through the western forest path. No delays." (Therin)
Hallen grunted. "Lucky me."
I gave him a weak thumbs up. "We can bond over our shared suffering."
He did not look amused.
We moved fast after that. Too fast for my liking. Bags were grabbed, potions shoved into pockets, and before I could negotiate for one last nap, we were out the back door of the guild hall into a narrow alley that smelled like wet stone and panic.
Rena stayed glued to my side. Literally. Her shoulder kept brushing mine as we jogged. Every time the crown gave the tiniest throb, she noticed.
"Lairn." (Rena)
"Yeah?"
"If it starts again… tell me immediately."
I nodded. Then, because I'm me, I added, "Only if you promise to carry me if I faint dramatically."
She rolled her eyes, but her lips twitched. Almost a smile. Almost.
Cute.
The western gate was chaos, but our group slipped through under the cover of guild authority and general panic. The forest swallowed us quickly. Tall trees, dripping leaves, mud that tried its best to steal my boots.
I tripped over a root within the first five minutes. Of course I did.
Rena caught my elbow before I face-planted. Again.
"You're impossible." (Rena)
"Impossible is my brand." (Lairn)
Hallen muttered something about "babysitting" under his breath. One of the mages—a quiet woman with blue streaks in her hair—actually chuckled.
The crown stayed quiet for a while. Too quiet. Like it was saving energy for something worse later.
As the trees thickened and the town sounds faded behind us, I felt that familiar anxious itch in my chest. Not fear exactly. More like… resignation mixed with the strong urge to find a nice mossy spot and sleep until the apocalypse sorted itself out.
But Rena was here. Marching ahead like she personally owed the universe a beatdown.
And somehow… that made the whole mess slightly less terrible.
Slightly.
...
We made camp as the light died. Small fire. Watches set. I was assigned "rest" duty, which I took very seriously by immediately flopping onto my bedroll.
Rena sat nearby, sharpening her sword with slow, deliberate strokes. The firelight made her look softer. Less like a force of nature, more like… someone who worried.
I stared at the stars peeking through the canopy.
"Hey, Rena." (Lairn)
"Hm?"
"If this crown thing turns me into some legendary hero against my will… promise you'll still drag me out of bed in the mornings?"
She paused mid-stroke. Then laughed quietly. A real one. The kind that made the forest feel less dark.
"Only if you promise to complain the entire time." (Rena)
"Deal."
The crown pulsed once. Gentle. Almost… content?
I closed my eyes.
For once, the universe let me have five minutes of peace.
It wouldn't last. It never does.
But for now… this was enough.
~Chapter Ends~