"Here's the paperwork you're left with, zombie Minato," I said, placing all the papers I could find from before the Kyubi's attack.
"It bothers me a little that I can't correct you on that statement," Minato complained, looking at me with a tired expression.
"Why are you complaining about this and not other things, like when I called you a sissy?" I asked him, to which he remained silent for a moment.
"There's no time for this," I heard Shikaku's voice behind me, bringing more papers.
"Because I feel like this is hell. They brought me back to life just to keep doing paperwork," Minato said, banging his head against the table.
After Minato revived, we brought him to the jonin meeting. It was a shock to see him alive, since some had seen his corpse.
In the end, I explained what I did, but with one caveat: it was a rather incomplete jutsu, so it could only last for a certain amount of time; after that, it couldn't be revived.
This way, I avoided the question of why they're sending him back or why they don't bring him back again.
In the end, I brought him back for a reason: he was the one who led the Kyubi's counterattack, so it was necessary for him to explain what happened and the reasons behind his actions.
At the meeting, Minato explained everything in great detail, even the timing of the attack. He mentioned that he had set a trap for me and imprisoned me in a separate dimension so that I wouldn't interfere with his plans regarding the tailed beast, dispelling the rumors that I didn't do anything intentionally but rather because I was in a situation just as critical as Minato.
That, along with the testimonies of Katsuyu, Tsunade, Shizune, and Hitori, saved me from having to overexplain everything, many times over.
He also spoke about the attacker, revealing himself as Madara Uchiha, which set off alarm bells among the Uchiha in the room, those closest to the wall; incidentally, it also alarmed the higher-ups who remembered the legends surrounding that individual.
Several people and ninjas testified that they saw the Nine-Tails with the eyes of the Sharingan, proving that it was indeed being controlled by an Uchiha.
However, Minato immediately ruled out the possibility that it was someone from the village, implying that it was a traitor or someone who had stolen a Sharingan to impersonate Madara Uchiha. He did, however, explain the ability to pass through objects, which again set off alarm bells among the Uchiha, since that meant it was a Mankeyo Sharingan.
And up until now, no mangekyou sharingan had been recorded, but technically, only Fugaku's eyes were in the village—if the flashback of the Uchiha massacre I saw wasn't filler—and Kosuke's eyes.
In fact, that somewhat reinforced the idea that it could really be Madara Uchiha or a successor from outside the village seeking revenge.
That lessened the accusation against the clan somewhat, but not the guilt, at least not entirely, since he was still an Uchiha until proven otherwise.
Since Minato had to leave, it was agreed that, before Minato was sent to the Pure Land, where he belonged, the next Hokage would be chosen. But first, as a Hokage's duty, he had to resolve the village's emergency situation, something Hiruzen happily delegated to Minato.
Seeing Minato Edo Tensei weeping on the Hokage's table, Shikaku and I exchanged a look, unsure what to do.
...
I was looking at Kushina's body, which was having a pretty hard time recovering. It's as if the Uzumaki genes had been deactivated or were simply acting to keep her body from dying. At least her brain is still intact.
The other problem is Kushina's mind; I can't imagine the shock of all this. That might be affecting her reluctance to wake up.
"Hello, Kushina, can you hear me?" I said close to her ear to see if there was any reaction from her body.
I just scratched my chin, staring at her body.
"The Kyubi's attack destroyed all the emergency ramen you had stored!!" I exclaimed, but there was no reaction whatsoever.
I looked at the monitor, and Kushina's slow heartbeat hadn't changed.
She just sighed.
I held out my hand to be handed over to the thing.
"Look, Kushina, this is Naruto, your son. Don't you want to see him?" I started shaking the thing a little roughly, making her cry, seeing that my attempts at motherhood were getting a reaction.
Naruto started crying loudly, but Kushina didn't react.
She sighed again, handing the thing to the nurse to calm him down.
"I can't think of anything right now to even make her react; maybe she can't even hear me," I told myself as I started touching different parts of her body to see if she would react at all.
While I was taking advantage of her a little, I looked at the monitor to see if there were any changes in her heart rate, and there was nothing.
Leaving Kushina's breasts, I looked at the nurse.
"I have other patients to see; if anything happens to Kushina or the baby, you'll die a gruesome death, understood?" I said, looking at her firmly.
"Y-yes, ma'am," the nurse said fearfully.
I just nodded and left the room. The Kyubi's attack overwhelmed the hospital, and as its owner, I had to come here to perform my duties as both a medical ninja and the hospital's administrator.
...
"Only a few areas were affected by the attack, but there's practically no damage to infrastructure; I think several buildings were already destroyed before the attack, and as for deaths, there were only about 20, mostly from objects falling on their heads," Daiki explained, looking at me.
"Good, something easy to fix. What about your area, Makoto?" I asked the other leader of the village's lawless zone.
"Buildings were destroyed, but no deaths, since when the attack started, they took advantage of the fact that none of them are active-duty ninjas to help as many people as possible," he said as he settled into his seat. "That said, the damage to the infrastructure was a bit greater."
"AH!!" Daiki yelled. When I looked, I saw Yami pulling his hair, and Daiki was doing his best to get him to let go.
"Heh," Makoto just gave him a mocking laugh, to which Daiki glared at him.
"How about you take a look at it now?" Daiki offered.
"No, thanks, I don't want him to make me bald," replied Makoto, whose hair was incredibly long, as long as mine in a single ponytail.
By the way, Daiki had short hair, but he had a single long strand, which was precisely the one Yami was pulling.
"Luckily, since the damage wasn't too extensive, I won't have to spend much on repairs; I'll send each of you the money to fix the damage from the attack," I said, standing up and approaching Daiki and Yami.
The moment Yami saw me, he immediately let go of the strand of hair from Daiki and held out his hands for me to pick it up.
I did it the second it was in my arms, and Yami grabbed my chest.
I just watched him trying to drink milk through my clothes, and at that moment I wondered if that's what he pulled out of me or if Kosuke was a breast fetishist.
...
A week had passed since the Nine-Tails attacked the village, and it was the busiest week of my life.
Working at the hospital, having to use wood release to rebuild buildings and houses, and having to attend to my own clan's affairs, among other things.
The worst part is that Minato, that ugly guy, called me in to talk. Not a second's rest; I only get a break when I feed Yami or Naruto or when I check on Hikari, who's days away from "being born," and see how Kushina is doing.
The rest of the day is work, work, and more work.
I've been sleeping with work on my mind, thinking about what I'm going to do tomorrow and all that kind of stuff, even though I'm going to die. I hope whatever he asks of me is something simple and easy.
Without asking permission, I opened the door to see Minato with Fugaku, Hiashi, and Shikaku.
"What is this, a sword fight in the Hokage's office? I thought that kind of thing only happened at the hot springs," I scoffed, trying to relieve some of the stress.
"I'm worried that the person you're proposing might be that kind of person, Minato," Hiashi commented, looking at me as if I were some kind of freak.
"But it's the best option," Fugaku added as Shikaku nodded.
Ignoring the comments from men who clearly can't satisfy their women—or at least, that's how they always seem in fanfiction—I stared at Minato.
"I'll be direct with you; I want you to be the Fifth Hokage," Minato said.
"I refuse," I replied immediately when he proposed the idea.
"May I ask why you refuse?" Shikaku asked when I said no.
"First, I have to deal with practically two clans; second, I'm in charge of the hospital; Third, I have several personal projects that, as Hokage, would greatly slow me down or even stop me altogether; and fourth, I am now a mother of one, and I will be taking care of Minato and another child on the way." List the reasons for declining the position.
"Another one? Are you pregnant again?" Hiashi asked.
"I thought the Hyuga only did three things: keep quiet, place seals on their cousins, and commit incest," I said humorlessly, to which Hiashi fell silent, realizing that if I continued speaking, I would continue talking about his clan.
Minato sighed.
"From points one through three, you can perfectly well leave it to trusted people, like the hospital; Tsunade practically takes care of it, so there's no excuse there. As for your clan, I know there are capable people, and regarding your personal projects, you must understand that the village is more important, especially in times of crisis," Minato commented.
"I should also mention that you probably don't want the position, but among the most likely candidates and those with the best chances of getting it, you're the only one," Shikaku added.
"Everyone knows that Fugaku, because of the Kyubi issue, won't be elected. And frankly, as noble as the Hyuga clan may be, no one has much confidence in them given their politics, both in the village and in their closed inner circle. So, if Danzo or Hiruzen try to get the position, it's highly likely they'll lose," Minato explained.
"And as much as I respect the Third Hokage, he's old and tired; he's even shown a tendency to make rash decisions, especially with those vultures after him, and you know that yourself. It's not a good idea for the Third Hokage to hold the position again," Shikaku said.
"Not to mention Danzo, who could turn out incredibly badly," Fugaku added.
"The only person who can run and beat those two is you, and if you do, the Uchiha, Hyuga, Nara, Yamanaka, and Akimichi clans will all support you," Minato said as everyone nodded in agreement.
I just listened, clicking my tongue.
"It sucks that he's right," I complained, sitting down in the armchair I'd set up in the office for when I came here.
"I don't know when you four became such good friends, but if it's to mess with those old guys, I'll accept," I said, a little resigned, as Minato and Shikaku smiled, Hiashi breathed a sigh of relief, and Fugaku nodded.
"I think one of the first things I'll do when I take the position is set up a daycare next to the office," I said, taking out a pipe from the old monkey that was hidden in a specific spot on the armchair and taking a puff to calm my cravings.
"Alright, the meeting to appoint the new Hokage will be held tomorrow," Minato announced.