"You're just in the nick of time."
Lisa spoke with a grin, Zack who was wearing an orange t-shirt with brown pants, hands in his pant's pockets. Cold breeze brushing through his flaxen hair.
"You convinced her?"
Zack took a pause before nodding abruptly. Misha's eyes dim for a moment but without warning she got hit by a wave of water by sea. Barley holding her balance not to be washed away by waves. It was like the world itself was telling her no intrusive thoughts.
Lisa laughed wildly because she was prepared, looking at Misha who was all wet, collapsed over the wet sand. Sara tried to hold her laughter but failed, even Zack chuckled. Though as usual the one who was making his castle and the one sitting on rock were nonchalant as ever.
Finally Zack's gaze went towards Ender and seeing him, he was startled. Ender didn't look at him because his gaze was intrigued by the gorgeous sunset. Zack didn't say a word and passed quietly.
Finally making his steps and when he was passing by Ruis's castle, he kicked it before going away.
"Bastard!"
But Ruis instead of going towards him, started fixing it, again.
Zack turned his neck upwards and gaze upon the skies, the chirping of birds. The sun hovered just inches above the jagged horizon, a molten coin bleeding crimson and deep orange into a bruised, lilac sky.
Being hit by the cold breeze, Zack closed his eyes for a moment. For a while, he sensed tranquility. Opening his eyes after some seconds, he saw Sara aside the sea shore.
Coming to think about it, Zack and her bond had gotten through severe conflicts.
Especially that night... Zack pinched the root of his nose, he didn't want to think about it. Breath hitching, seeing Sara was still in the same spot and act. He hesitated to go towards her.
"She regrets it too."
Hearing a familiar voice from behind, it was Ruis who causally said that. Zack didn't turn around, he didn't need to, grunting then after a while making his pace towards her.
When he was behind her amidst the molten amber sky of bruised violet and rolling waves crashing gently against their feet. She didn't turn around but her body behavior showed that she knew who was after him.
"H– Hey."
He stuttered, clenching his teeth.
"I– I know why you keep distancing from me. It's fine, regardless it was my fault. If only I didn't say those words to you all.. that day... the outcome will turn out better."
"Do you believe I'm not sufficient enough to carry your guilt?"
She finally opened her mouth, her tone wasn't emotional. It was more composed as ever like she was inquiring, taken aback. Zack didn't know what to say yet, while she gradually turned towards him.
Her pearls were as calm as water in a bowl. So her face, not showing a single emotion, was truly unreadable. Zack cleared his throat, he still can't decide what to say.
"Am I that useless?... Then why am I living? I should die too."
Zack lips quivered, his fingers twitching. Suddenly he finally backed off from her, bursting into rage.
"No! It's me! The real problem is me! If I didn't exist then all of you would live their best lives! I am the one who should die! Not you! All of you! AGHHH!"
He collapsed to the sand, at this moment. Everyone watched them from afar, even Ender was intrigued. Lisa moved her steps but Misha stretched her arm to stop her. While all of this was happening, Sara kept her composure.
"Do you remember when we first met? In primary school? When you had no idea where you were, you cried for the whole time, begging for teachers to drop you home."
Sara took a pause before speaking again.
"Being your classmate I was one of the students who were tasked to stop you from sobbing. Do you remember what I did?"
This time her cheeks slightly curved to a smile. Zack went silent for some moments before finally mumbling.
"When it was your turn, you beat me to a pulp. Only then did I finally stop crying even after my parents came to pick me up."
"That was the day I realized you were a sensitive boy who didn't want to be left alone. Then... What happened in those years which changed you so much?"
Zack paused, biting his lips.
"That I became unusable."
"I– I... I am sorry. You were the reason why my life went colorful after dull days. I– I just don't want.. to give you pain and suffering. I– I just want you... all to live.. happily ever."
"How can I live happily when you're not in my life?"
Lifting his head up with her fingers, to see a face full of guilt and regrets. Meanwhile the sun behind Sara, the golden rays of light were blocked by her, resulting in a shadow before Zack. He could see her face clearly at this moment, it was a concerned face, a softened face.
She kneels down before Zack. This time the sun beam scattered as he was shrouded by light.
"Those words meant nothing to me, what meant to me was the one who said it. I was afraid of you, what if you do something wrong? Leading to irreversible consequences."
Her breath hitched as she requested.
"Please... for me... Live with us..."
A tear ran down to Zack's cheek.
~ How?... Even after what I have done... How?
But before he could process any other thought. He felt warmth all over himself, it was when Sara embraced him. Zack couldn't process any other thought. So giving up, he embraced her as well.
"Forgive me... Forgive me... For everything.."
"You did nothing wrong, you're not a bad person.. It happens..."
Sara brushed her fingers over his hair. Everyone watched them in silence, it was like two siblings after a long period of not contacting each other had finally met up and said things which were buried in their hearts. The things that they always wanted to say but can't.
Zack's gaze went over Lisa. In the end he still didn't say those things he always wanted to say, because even now he was still scared. Scared that this will change the way they view him.
Ender was intrigued watching them.
~ If it doesn't exist then how do we define it?
Feelings were such a topic which always intrigued him. Having an inability to not feel feelings but having almost perfect understanding of them.
~ If there's something which you can't explain, does it mean it doesn't exist for you?
Seeing Sara getting on her knees before she gently slapped Zack's cheeks with a smile.
~ If these things can't be felt but can be understood. Then you can truly feel, which is the reason why you're behaving like this, because this is truly a face of flooded emotions.
Zack's eyes were still covered with tears as he brushed them off with his hands. He felt someone glaring at him, looking there to say it was Ender.
Zack was surprised seeing such a curious face of his, unconsciously making a fist which drags sand to it.
~ Maybe no one is equal at all. They were never meant to be equal.
Zack thought to himself.
~ Maybe you can't ever feel them but you can understand them, that is your curse. While I can feel them but can't understand them, that is mine.
Zack sighed, getting up. Everyone had witnessed the scene between Zack and Sara yet they didn't speak about it. In the end it was something they didn't wish to discuss because it meant only to the two of them.
Watching everyone doing their play like before, Ender's gaze was still fixed over Zack like he was mused over him.
~ Maybe a day will come when you will tell me about what you feel and I will tell you what I understand.
Moments Later...
The day was bleeding out in a spectacular, slow motion catastrophe across the horizon. The sky, once a dome of brilliant azure, was now a canvas for a furious, silent fire torn layers of tangerine and bruised purple.
As the sun's heavy, copper disc touched the waterline, it didn't just dip; it ignited the sea. The water near the shore became a slurry of liquid gold, reflecting the fading inferno above, while farther out, the deep, shifting blues were already surrendering to the encroaching dark.
Seeing this event in front of her eyes, Lisa who was sitting on a beach mat was staring at the deep red-golden coin pasted over the center. Misha was beside watching the scenery along with her.
Zack and Sara were splashing water at each other this time. Meanwhile Ruis had finished making his castle, it was huge, the top reaching his thigh level. Ender had finally gotten up from the rock, yet was strolling around it.
"You had sealed Ender's spirituality right?"
Misha was the one who shattered the silence between them. Nonetheless Lisa blurted out.
"Yep, will unsealed it when we're about to leave for Raiheart."
That said, Misha gets herself up, stretching her shoulders one by one. Before taking her slippers and departing from the scene. Lisa didn't inquire because she didn't need to, getting herself up as well and walking away.
Sara, who was exhausted with her clothes, was all soggy so making a sign at Zack to stop as she started strolling.
"I can take you there."
"Ahh.. no need."
She started strolling slowly, smiling before landing on the other beach mat beside the one where Misha and Lisa were resting.
"I'm so tired... even my tiredness is tired..."
She murmured, deadpan. Closing her eyes and it seemed like she had dozed off. Ruis had finally finished his castle, slapping his hands with themselves to brush off sand, he watched it from all sides before going and lying on the other mat. Exhausted.
On the other side Ender was leaning to the rock nonchalantly, his eyes closed.
"Tired already?"
He opens his eyes slowly to watch Misha beside him. Her expression was weirdly light like she was or had been ignoring the things he had done here.
"You know you really did an awesome job in getting us surprised."
She spoke in her odd, teasing tone.
Yet Ender was stoic as ever, like he could see through everything.
"I can see you're forcing yourself to be nice. It's useless because in the end... you all will end up hating me."
He blurted out without care. Misha was taken aback for a moment but she hissed before declaring.
"That means you're underestimating our bond."
She continued, this time her tone became solemnly sober.
"You're scared right?"
Ender didn't react, his dead eyes were tired from everything.
"Scared of being with us? Scared of moving on from your past?"
Ender wondered, his gaze fixed over the seashore.
~ I don't know who I am? I don't remember who I was? My memories are scattered deep in an endless void. I must seek the truth, even if it destroys who I am right now. Or who will I be, it will be worth it.. knowing oneself, no matter the price.
Unexpectedly Misha heard his thoughts this time using her authority. Surprised, she placed her palm over his shoulder.
"We will be by your side."
She takes her hand off, walking away. Ender watched her going. His eyes were saying something that was unreadable.
~ Maybe it's one of my inabilities to not feel those unreal emotions. Maybe it's one of my inabilities to not change. Is this what I am?
Ender looked at the sky which was almost covered in darkness. The moon had risen and the sun had almost gone.
Ender had accepted himself of what he was, who he was and who he will be and what he will be, it was truly inevitable.
"I will break free from these bounds."
Moments Before...
Zack wasn't that tired because his gaze was fixed over the gorgeous scenery of the sky, sunset, everything. Speechless as ever he could be,
"It's beautiful, isn't it?"
Hearing a familiar voice, he looked there. To see Lisa standing with a smile. His knees collapsed on their own, puzzled why this happened. His mind didn't shift over it. Instead his gaze was intrigued by her presence.
She came closer to him, extending her arm for him to hold on to, which he subconsciously did.
"Wanna run together along the shore?"
"A bit tired..."
He mumbled, not realizing he was still holding her hand.
"Ahh! Don't worry I won't let you down."
She made her pace and in an instant before he could even realize it, he was running along with her.
Yet despite all this, his mind was lost in its own thoughts.
~ Come to think about it. You're the only one who knows everything about me. How much time has passed since I met you? A month or a bit more? Probably... yet you know me better than I know myself.
They ran over the waves. Their hands were clasped tightly together, a solid anchor against the vastness of the darkening beach and the roaring symphony of the incoming tide. The cold spray kissed their flushed faces, and the wind, laden with the sharp scent of salt and ancient depths, pulled at their hair.
Zack almost lost his balance for a few moments, struggling to keep up with her. Whereas Lisa was as joyful as ever, she finally made a real smile. Glancing at him from behind. Still smiling.
Zack was speechless.
~ Are you?... The door of my life?... If so, please get me out of this world. If not, please pray for my sins to be replenished.
The last bruised streaks of amber and violet finally collapsed into the western horizon, swallowing the remnants of the sun. For a few fleeting moments, the world hung in a breathless, ink-blue dusk. The heavy warmth of the day rapidly dissolved, replaced by a cool, salted breeze that carried the sharp scent of the deep ocean.
Their pace finally stopped as she turned around before him. Smirking. Whereas he and the same expression he had moments ago.
"I heard all of that, you know?"
Now a brilliant, silver moon breached the eastern horizon, casting off the hazy shroud of twilight. As it climbed higher into the velvet expanse, it spilled a river of liquid mercury across the restless surface of the sea.
"What?"
He was completely baffled. She giggled, her cheeks became reddish like her eyes.
"Your thoughts."
Zack's mind went blank, so his face.
From afar, Ruis and Sara who were sitting on a mat were watching them, of course they can clearly hear them thanks to their supernatural abilities.
"This seems like some kind of confession."
Sara mumbled, she was more curious than anything else.
"That's too early for it."
Ruis replied nonchalantly, watching the castle he had made was gradually being washed by the waves. Nevertheless he wasn't bothered much about it. Sighing.
Suddenly Misha came and sat on the back of the mat silently, she was watching them as well.
"God damnit! How can I forget that!?"
Zack yelled, his face red like a cherry. He slumped onto the sand. While Lisa could do nothing but giggled at him.