Earth-1616, the Daily Bugle building.
The balding, elderly J. Jonah Jameson looked on with a mixture of shock and fury as this gang of goddamn supervillains threatened him. When Mac Gargan stepped directly in front of him, Jonah simply lost his temper and roared, "You piece of trash, Scorpion! Are you actually threatening a journalist who has upheld justice for decades? Do you honestly think your pathetic intimidation is going to work?"
"Justice?"
Hearing this, Scorpion froze for a fraction of a second before bursting into a raucous laugh. "J. Jonah Jameson is actually lecturing me on justice? Shut your mouth! Have you forgotten exactly how I was turned into this subhuman, monstrous freak? It was all because of you!"
Jonah was momentarily choked up by Scorpion's retort, but he quickly regained his composure and continued to curse at him, "I funded your cybernetic modifications so you could deal with that goddamn supervillain Spider-Man! I didn't pay for you to become just another supervillain yourself!"
"Spider-Man? A supervillain?"
Doctor Octopus, who happened to be walking past, caught the exchange and cast a look of pure disdain at Jonah. "No, no, no, J. Jonah Jameson. I know exactly what your attitude toward Spider-Man really is. You simply loathe him; you're jealous of him. The number of people he has saved far exceeds the number of faces you've ever seen in your entire life. You merely refuse to believe that anyone could possess the capacity to sacrifice themselves so selflessly. What a pity. Don't worry, once we slaughter Spider-Man, you will live to regret it."
Jonah flew into a towering rage upon hearing Doctor Octopus's words. "You're talking out of your ass! I understand Spider-Man far better than any of you clowns! No one knows better than me what a goddamn, wretched, abominable piece of—"
Doctor Octopus directly gagged JJJ to cut off his endless babble. They had completely locked down the entirety of the Daily Bugle building. Venom and Mister Negative were coordinating their forces; after Mister Negative corrupted a vast contingent of security guards, Venom blanketed them with symbiotes, transforming them into powerful foot soldiers to seal off every single exit.
This Sinister Sixteen syndicate kept their focus locked tight on the building, waiting at any moment for Spider-Man to show up.
Meanwhile, the out-of-shape Peter had already arrived.
"Whew. I seriously need to lose weight. If I keep going like this, I won't even be able to squeeze through a ventilation shaft." The out-of-shape Peter muttered under his breath as he crawled out from the bathroom ceiling vent, stretching his body slightly. "This is being broadcasted on every network. MJ is bound to see me like this, sigh..."
Right as he was sighing and groaning, the bathroom door swung open. The Vulture, who had rushed in to use the facilities, locked eyes with the out-of-shape Peter standing right there. He immediately opened his mouth to bellow, "Spi—"
"I appreciate the warm welcome here, Toomes, but I'm afraid I don't have the time to catch up with you today."
The out-of-shape Peter immediately sealed Vulture's mouth shut with web-fluid. Just as Vulture was about to deploy his wings to slice the web-head to pieces, he discovered that his mechanical wings were completely unresponsive. The out-of-shape Peter dragged Vulture over, knocked him out cold with a single punch, and stuffed him directly into a stall.
This nanotech suit was genuinely useful; it could instantly hijack the opposing technology. It was a shame it didn't belong to him, as he would have to return it eventually.
The out-of-shape Peter muttered to himself as he carefully advanced, while Peter himself followed silently behind under cloaking. He paused briefly to inspect Vulture's condition. He had initially assumed that whoever cloned Vulture and the others would have installed some sort of control apparatus inside their bodies, but a thorough examination revealed absolutely nothing, which sparked his curiosity.
Could the Jackal truly be that confident in these guys, believing that relying solely on this Sinister Sixteen would be sufficient? Or had he already prepared to unleash a Sinister Sixty or even a Sinister Six Hundred?
Peter couldn't quite fathom it for the moment, so he chose to keep tracking his alternate self. The moment he stepped through the doorway, he spotted Gwen standing right outside the restroom entrance.
"Why are you standing out here?"
"Well, I saw that uncle walking inside, so I figured you were bound to be tracking him from behind." Gwen explained her reasoning for waiting outside the door, before offering an assessment of the building's current situation. "You were right. Before Spider-Man showed up, these guys really weren't going to do anything excessive. But now that that uncle has arrived, all bets are off. You can't expect them to prioritize the safety of the hostages once the real fighting breaks out."
"Furthermore, the National Guard and the NYPD have completely surrounded the exterior. Anyone attempting to flee is highly likely to get caught in the crossfire." Peter analyzed the scenario. "However, I've already taken care of that variable. Now, it all depends on whether this universe's sole superhero can successfully draw the supervillains away from the hostages."
As long as the villains could be lured away, Peter could utilize the Sling Ring portal to evacuate everyone safely. As for the infiltration process, it wasn't a concern. Gwen could utilize cognitive erasure directly, and he possessed personal cloaking, making it easy to slip close to the hostages.
The only real complication was that the hostages were numerous and varied, and a significant portion of them were ordinary civilians who had been corrupted and infected by Mister Negative and Venom.
Peter remained uncertain about the exact threshold required to trigger a canon anomaly, but once the main battle officially commenced over there, he could attempt to neutralize those two villains. To the native Spider-Man of this universe, Mister Negative and Venom might be exceptionally formidable adversaries, but to Peter, they posed absolutely zero challenge.
In fact, it would be more accurate to say that even if all sixteen of these Spider-Man villains—whose origins and power levels adhered more closely to the source material—attacked him simultaneously, they would still fall slightly short of his level and be no match for him at all. However, since this wasn't his home universe, Peter still intended to show some respect to the parameters of a canon event.
Meanwhile, on the other side, the out-of-shape Spider-Man had already reached the broadcasting studio where the television cameras were set up. He crept along silently, believing that no one had detected his presence, when suddenly the steel beam he was crouching upon was forcibly ripped down by someone, sending him crashing directly in front of the camera lens.
Coincidentally, he landed right in front of J. Jonah Jameson.
"Oh, hey, Jonah. When was the last time we had such up-close and personal contact? It's been a few years, hasn't it?"
"Spider-Man? It's you again. If it weren't for you..."
"I strongly suggest we table that discussion for later!"
Just as his spider-sense flared with an alert of incoming danger, the out-of-shape Peter executed a swift flip to leap into the air. He extended both arms to grab hold of Doctor Octopus's mechanical tentacles. Immediately after, the nanotech suit swung into action; a swarm of nanites swarmed into the mechanical limbs, overriding the microchips controlling them. Doctor Octopus let out a gasp of utter disbelief before collapsing paralyzed to the floor.
"Sorry about that, Doc. Winning like this today does feel a bit cheap, though I suppose you guys cheating by resurrecting from the dead sort of evens it out."
The out-of-shape Peter stood up and turned toward the captives. "Alright, Jonah, and everyone else—hurry up and evacuate through the side exit! I'll hold them off, move!"
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