Honestly speaking, despite Jax's attitude and devil-may-care performance, he felt like shit.
Physically.
Generally.
Spiritually, if he was being dramatic.
And Jax was very good at being dramatic.
On one hand, he was weak. His body was slow, his movements lagging in ways that would be terrible in battle.
The thing that made it worse, though, was the way Beatris moved to avoid him again.
Like they were back to square one after the warehouse thing.
He had been making such good progress too.
The setback bit deeper because of that.
They made it around halfway to Spellerguard before it was decided they would make camp.
By this point, setting up camp was so natural that everyone did their jobs without needing someone to designate roles.
Jax gathered firewood.
Selene unpacked the sleeping bags and things.
Aiden checked the A.T.V. to make sure everything was good, then gathered herbs for potion brewing before bed.
Beatris counted the food and water supplies.
Liora checked for monsters.
Thalia set up the tarp and sleeping areas.
The work was like that of a well-oiled machine, one that required every person to do their role perf—
"Hey, Aiden," Beatris said, perfectly cutting off Jax's internal dialogue, "can you count the stuff for me? I'll go with Jax on firewood duty in case his wounds start acting up."
Jax stopped.
Then he turned.
Aiden seemed just as surprised.
"Uh," Aiden said, "sure, if you want to."
Aiden and Jax met eyes.
They initiated their super-secret skill.
Brolepathy.
Not an actual skill.
The special skill that allowed the tightest of bros to communicate only through blinking and vague body movements. With this seemingly niche skill, entire conversations could be exchanged without alerting anyone.
Jax blinked in rhythm and swirled his paws in opposite directions.
Dude, what is she doing? I thought she was avoiding me?
Aiden looked back, cleared his throat, spun in place, and tapped one finger on the trailer.
I don't know, man. On the plus side, here's your chance to fix whatever was done.
The girls all stared at them with expressions of confusion and secondhand embarrassment.
It seemed the capabilities of Brolepathy had expanded to reveal the female mind for one brief, shining moment.
What the fuck are those two nutjobs doing?
This skill had to be developed further.
Who knew?
In just a few years, they might revolutionize male-to-female interaction by allowing men to understand things foreign to them.
Like hints.
Or flirting.
Or why "I'm fine" could apparently mean seventeen different things and six of them being lethal.
Jax believed Beatris must have been watching him think, because she ran over and delivered a solid punch to his face.
He spiraled and crumpled to the ground, his snout throbbing as Beatris grabbed him and began dragging him toward the woods.
"Quit being weird, you mangy mutt!" Beatris barked through clenched teeth.
Aiden and the others watched.
After a moment, Aiden asked quietly, "I thought you were helping… prevent… injuries."
Jax ended up walking on his own after a minute.
Beatris began speaking in a strange language that Jax recognized from the amount of times she had looked at the small little white glows that flew around her.
They seemed to be having an argument.
Beatris was flushed with anger as she snapped at the air where the floating balls hovered, barking at them in that strange language.
Jax tried his best to work around them, giving her all the time she needed to sort out her issues with Sera and…
Melt?
Wait, no.
Malt.
As he worked, he could not help but notice Beatris's occasional glances at him.
Then she walked over and cornered him against a set of twin trees he could not squeeze through.
Size-wise, Jax had the advantage.
Emotionally, spiritually, and in terms of immediate survival, he very much did not want to test that.
"Jax," Beatris said, "we need to talk about what happened in the dungeon."
Jax turned back to her.
She locked her intense, slightly hostile gaze on him.
In a weird way, he no longer felt like he had the size advantage.
He shrank back.
"Uhh, sure," Jax said. "Are you looking for an apology about hiding the vow thing? Because I'll totally apologize for that. I was in the wrong, and I am so—"
Beatris cut him off with a shake of her head.
"I'm talking about the fact that you're hiding that you're still not fully recovered mentally."
A shiver ran through him.
The kind of shiver someone only felt when another person looked into something private.
Something they were not sure they were ready to share.
Something they found they were still not fully prepared for.
Jax looked down, refusing to meet Beatris's eyes.
Then he felt it.
That small voice.
The one that had been new since he woke up.
A persistent dark thought.
We need to kill her.
She will tell the others, and we will be alone again.
We can't tear apart our father if we are alone.
The voice spoke in an almost sickening way.
Using Orion's voice.
His brother's voice.
Jax looked at Beatris, expecting a stern expression or steely resolve.
Instead, he was surprised to find her looking at him with…
Was that pity?
"How long were you planning to wait before telling us about this, Jax?" Beatris asked.
She sounded concerned.
Even a bit angry.
The thing that stung, though, was that the anger in her voice carried a sense of betrayal.
Jax took a moment to collect himself.
Then he turned to Beatris.
"I…" Jax swallowed. "I was planning to hide it until I could find a fix on my own."
He could have lied.
He could have reassured her that he was just trying to find a good time.
Orion's voice in his head never encouraged that.
But something in Jax refused to lie about this right now.
Beatris looked him in the face.
"Is it because you think we're weak?" she asked, a tint of venom in her voice. "That we can't handle hearing about this?"
"It's not!" Jax snapped.
Then his voice caught.
"It… this… I…"
His mouth felt like a trap.
Then the words finally spilled out in a rush.
"I just didn't want to be alone again, okay?"
Beatris looked at him with an unreadable expression.
Around Jax, vines rose from the ground, covered in white petals.
Party member Beatris has evoked the pact.
A Primrose Garden rises around her.
Jax watched the towering vines rise.
This was Beatris's offensive skill.
The one she had used in the dungeon with the necromancers.
"Wait," Jax said, desperation tinting his voice. "Beatris, please."
He knew it.
She was going to chase him off.
Tell him he was going to drag the party down.
Tell him he was going to get someone killed by hiding things.
Jax knew she was right.
He knew it would be the correct thing to do.
Fear gripped him anyway.
He tried to move.
Tried to step back.
But vines wrapped around his paws and held him in place.
Orion's voice screamed inside his head.
Break free.
Rip apart the vines.
Tear off your own arms if you have to.
They will grow back anyway.
Kill her.
We must kill her before she takes away our chance for revenge.
Jax closed his eyes.
He waited for the strike.
Or for the vines to grab him and throw him.
Instead, warmth spread through him.
Orion's voice, a moment ago booming and hostile, became no louder than a barely audible whisper.
The vines around Jax receded.
Beatris watched him as if searching for something.
Party member Beatris has evoked the second clause of their pact.
A Primrose Garden gives its vitality to you.
"I…" Jax blinked. "I don't…"
He looked at the flowers.
Then at Beatris.
"What did… huh?"
Dozens of questions rushed through his mind.
Most of them refused to wait their turn.
Beatris turned and began walking back to the pile of firewood. She gathered some in her paws to carry.
"I didn't get rid of it," she said. "I can't."
Her voice was quieter now.
"The best I can do is suppress it if it starts to run wild like it did."
She paused.
"This needs to be addressed sooner rather than later. Understand?"
Jax stared after her.
Small wells of tears gathered in his eyes.
He nodded.
Beatris paused, her mouth open as she reached for her pile.
Then she looked back at him.
This time, her voice was more shy.
"You helped me not be alone anymore," Beatris said. "I'm just returning the favor, is all."
Jax nodded, fighting to hold back tears.
Only one thing came to mind.
"Thank you."