"Wow! This is the Alchemy Commission? The whole area is a hospital? It's huge!"
Luka is like a kid fresh in the big city. Even after some time on the Xianzhou, he still can't help being amazed.
Stelle crosses her arms over her chest. "This isn't exactly a hospital—it's more of a research institute."
"A medical research place? You directly brought me here to see a doctor—you're amazing!" Luka can't help giving a thumbs-up.
Then, from the corner of his eye, he spots a familiar figure.
Luka leans to Stelle's ear. "Hey! Isn't that Miss Sushang? Why's she here too?"
Before Stelle can answer, Luka's already at Sushang's side. "Miss Sushang, what a coincidence! You sick too?"
[Hahaha.]
[Pure and honest folk.]
[Sweet-talker.]
[Zero-frame opener right there.]
[What straightforwardness.]
Sushang puffs her cheeks, a bit annoyed. "What kind of way is that to talk? You're the one who's sick!"
"Sorry, sorry—I meant... you're here to see a doctor too?"
"No, I'm here to get some trauma medicine for my Cloud Knight brothers."
Lingsha sees Luka chatting animatedly with Sushang and curiously asks Stelle, "Stelle, we meet again. Who's this with you?"
"A visitor from beyond Jarilo-VI."
Luka politely adds, "Hello, I'm Luka, a friend of Stelle. I'm from Belobog and a participant in this Martial Exhibition Ceremony!"
"Belobog..." Lingsha smiles to ease the awkwardness. "Sorry, forgive my ignorance. But welcome to the Luofu. Mr. Luka, you'd like a consultation?"
Luka nods. "Uh, it's kind of a weird story..."
Luka explains in detail the hallucinations he's been having since arriving on the Luofu.
Lingsha lowers her hand from her chin. "Interesting... Hmm, let's do an imaging scan first to check for any organic issues in the brain. Fighters like you tend to run into these kinds of problems now and then."
"Hm? What's that got to do with 'temperament'? Is bad temperament a disease too?" Sushang delivers steadily as ever.
[Sushang consistent as always.]
[This is the Sushang I know. What idiom? That's not your job.]
[I heard there's Sushang in Honkai Impact 3rd too.]
[Hope HI3 Sushang gets a different personality—ideally erudite and masterful in both martial and literary arts.]
[Keep dreaming.]
[Hahaha, worth a shot.]
— —
Lingsha quickly clarifies, "It's 'organic issue'! Meaning... how do I explain it to you?"
After a moment's thought, she puts it plainly: "Basically, your brain's broken."
Luka's eyes nearly pop out. "Ah—my brain's broken?!"
"Don't worry. Since you've come to the Alchemy Commission, I'll do everything I can."
She then leads Luka to a brain CT machine that looks roughly like a mirror.
Soon after.
Lingsha looks at the CT image and lets out a long "Hmm."
That scares Luka—he remembers Natasha sighing like that usually means the patient doesn't have long. "Master Cauldron, did you see something? Am I still salvageable?"
Lingsha: "Hmm..."
Stelle joins in with an "Hmm."
"There's a massive shadow in his brain... Could it be..."
Luka's heart stops. When he recovers, he pleads, "I-I'm still young, Doctor. I don't want to die..."
Stelle examines the huge shadow carefully. "Could it be a misdiagnosis?"
Sushang: "Ah... that shadow looks a lot like my hand."
"Look, it's even doing the 'yeah' sign! I told you this isn't a group photo." Lingsha turns to Luka. "From the imaging, your head seems perfectly fine. Mr. Luka, have you eaten anything unusual lately?"
Hearing he's not in serious danger, Luka relaxes and slowly recalls his recent meals. "Let me think... When I first got to the Xianzhou, I tried some local specialties—Warbling Lotus Cake, Red Oil Chaotic Beef Offal, Scalegorge Ice Spring, Soda Bean Juice, Spicy Chicken Cubes, Garlic Sprout Pork Belly..."
[Listing dishes like that—now I'm hungry.]
[Wait, did something outrageous just get mentioned?]
[Soda Bean Juice? Luka's that guy!]
[Hahaha, legend—championship locked!]
— —
Luka continues, "Once the matches started, my diet got strict—brown rice, corn, buckwheat, boiled chicken breast, boiled beef shank, boiled fish, boiled shrimp..."
Sushang unconsciously steps back. "Uh... feeding pigs? Mr. Luka, tell me honestly—is Stelle abusing you? I'll stand up for you!"
"No way! It's competition season—I have to control my diet. Can't eat randomly."
Lingsha shakes her head. "Impressive appetite, but nothing there that would break your brain."
"Oh right! After my match with Miss Sushang, I drank a bottle of 'Sweet Dream Sparkling Beverage'! But I'd already started having hallucinations before that?" Luka has a sudden realization.
"Sweet Dream... Sparkling Beverage?" Lingsha thinks for a moment and understands.
"I think I get it. You're in a foreign land—naturally tense. That anxious, unstable mental state got amplified after you drank the Sweet Dream Sparkling Beverage.
That drink has a lot of Memetic Substance added to stimulate dreams and make them pleasant. For some reason, it magnified your unease instead, triggering severe hallucinations."
Luka spreads his hands. "Sorry, I didn't understand a single word..."
[Same here.]
[Don't say you didn't get it—I didn't either.]
"It's fine if you don't understand. This condition has no medicine."
Lingsha's words nearly stop Luka's heart again.
Seeing his reaction, she quickly explains, "I mean, no need for medicine. Spend more time wandering the Luofu, let new things shock your system, and—stop drinking Sweet Dream Sparkling Beverage. In a few days, the symptoms should fade gradually."
Luka breathes a sigh of relief. "Wander the Luofu more... no more Sweet Dream Sparkling Beverage... Got it, Doctor. I'll follow your advice."
"I just remembered—there's a little something that can help ease your symptoms... Please wait a moment."
After Lingsha leaves, Stelle and Sushang chat. From the conversation, they learn a key detail: The Martial Exhibition Ceremony has a popularity revival mechanic. If your popularity is high enough, you can enter the revival round and return to the arena.
A pretty decent rule.
...
While they're chatting, Lingsha returns with a pig following her.
The pig looks like a rice dumpling with legs.
"Mr. Luka, come see—this is the 'Dream Tapir Therapy' I prepared for you."
Sushang's eyes glue to the dream tapir instantly, her girlish heart exploding. "Oh my gosh... what is this? Let me touch it! Oh my gosh... what is this? Let me touch it!"
In the footage, the dream tapir lets out adorable sounds: "Momo~ mo~ momo~"
"Ohhh... so cute! Baby, you're a giant strawberry steamed bun~ Momo, baby, momo~"
[Not gonna lie, Sushang's description is spot-on.]
[It's cute, but I'm not really into it.]
[This pig's got a unique look.]
[I think it's pretty cute. Hahaha, would make a great pillow.]
[This slice-of-life segment is hilarious. I'm tired of all the fighting—give me more of this daily stuff.]
— —
Stelle raises an eyebrow at Sushang. "Sushang, show some restraint."
"With something this adorable, restraint is impossible!"
Lingsha points at the dream tapir and explains, "This is a dream tapir from the Zhu Ming Xianzhou. Mild temperament, sweet taste—but not edible, okay."
[Sweet taste? Not edible?]
[Not edible, but sweet taste!]
[Then how do you know it's sweet?]
[I wonder if dream tapirs and Warp Trotters are related?]
[Both in the fat-and-round category.]
[Accountant furious!]
— —
Lingsha then explains its function: Dream tapirs feed on Memetic Substance. Luka just needs to sleep with it nearby—no other effort required.
Luka finds it incredibly magical. When Lingsha says it's free, it becomes even more magical.
[Give me one. I'm in college—every night I close my eyes and see my thesis.]
[I want one too. The thought of opening my eyes to endless work gives me a headache that keeps me awake.]
[Every day running for mortgage, car loan, credit loans—I'm insomniac too.]
[miHoYo, if you're listening, sell dream tapirs.]
Suddenly, a link pops up in the bottom right of the video:
"Dream Tapir Plush Pillow, made with special craftsmanship. It slowly releases sleep-aid gas inside.
Adjustable firmness, effectively improves sleep quality."
[What the—? They actually made it?]
[Does this thing really exist?]
[It's just an aromatherapy pillow. Probably expensive.]
[Who said miHoYo can't make money? Step forward.]
[There's a link—clicking won't hurt.]
Viewers click—and are stunned.
The notice reads: "Orders placed within 21 days enjoy 1 yuan deducting 99 yuan."
In other words, the dream tapir plush pillow costs just 1 yuan.
[One yuan?]
[Only one yuan? Does miHoYo know how to make money?]
[Is one yuan legit?]
[I checked—one yuan is just the plush. The sleep-aid incense is separate but cheap, and shipping's free.]
[At one yuan, it's basically free. Who needs a bike?]
— —
Sushang suddenly interrupts. "Hey! You two! You have other stuff to do later, right? Carrying this baby around must be inconvenient, right? Right?!"
Meanwhile, the dream tapir flops over, a snot bubble from its nose, and falls asleep instantly.
"What are you planning..." Stelle narrows her eyes at Sushang.
"Don't look at me like that!" Sushang gazes expectantly at the dream tapir. "You guys go handle your things. I'm heading back to Skysplitter to deliver medicine to the team... As a Cloud Knight, I help those in need and do one good deed a day. I can carry this dream tapir back to your waiting room for you! Just holding it—no taking it for myself!"
Luka generously agrees. "Of course, Miss Sushang. You can come play with it anytime~"
"Yay! Thanks, Mr. Luka~" Sushang thanks him, then stares at the sleeping dream tapir with a crazed grin, hands creeping closer. "Come here, baby, hehehe~ A little dream tapir like you was born to be eaten by big sis Sushang~ Hehehe~"
[Hahaha, Lady Shiji?]
[I'm dead—Sushang's girl heart is in overdrive.]
Sushang hugs the dream tapir, giving it a full face-wash rub, a blissful sleepy smile on her face as she leaves their sight.
"The way she is right now... is exactly how Seele was the first time she saw a live icefield bear..." Luka nods thoughtfully.
Lingsha watches Sushang's back with a faint smile. "Seems dream tapirs can restore rationality... and make people lose it too. Quite an interesting research topic."
Lingsha has business to attend to and leaves first.
Then, Stelle and Luka leave the Alchemy Commission and head to the Divination Commission.
— —
The scene shifts—they've successfully met up with Lynx.
According to Lynx, she was watching card games in Exalting Sanctum when a kind-hearted girl offered to help repair the Jade Abacus.
And then... nothing.
Luka frowns slightly. "Isn't that girl a bit much?"
Stelle scratches her head. Hearing Lynx's description, a familiar old friend naturally comes to mind.
"Then I'll go get her back."
Lynx nods seriously and points the way. "That girl should be over there, playing some 'game' with other diviners."
Soon, Stelle spots Qingque playing a game with another diviner.
It's Qingque after all!
After some back-and-forth, Stelle somehow ends up trending like crazy in the so-called "Seeking Circle."
But the result is good—Qingque comes back.
...
Qingque and Lynx exchange smiles, then look at Luka. "So this is the Luka you mentioned? Nice to meet you. I've been seeing you in the news lately~ I'm Qingque, a diviner from the Divination Commission.
Miss Lynx told me everything. She said she has a rare antique and wants me to see if it can be fixed.
I took one look—this is a Jade Abacus... an old model from hundreds of years ago. Out of curiosity, I took on the job of restoring the data."
For a moment, Stelle thinks she's fallen for Sunday's trick and is still asleep in Penacony.
"This is Qingque!"
"Sigh... can't hide it from you." Qingque says helplessly. "The Master Diviner went back to her old home in the Jade Chamber for business, right? Before leaving, she dumped a huge pile of data, tables, data, tables, data, tables on me... My eyes were going blind!
Now there's a chance right in front of me—to restore important historical documents... Strictly speaking, it's not slacking, and I get to see some fresh stories. Why not?
Actually, I've already restored part of the data. But Lynx said you have to be the first to see it—because the owner of this Jade Abacus is your life idol."