Near the Coast of Ostia Antica, 60 AD, Rome
Ritsuka POV
[GudakoBot: Waifu Counter 11]
[Load more messages ]
The longer he stared at GudakoBot's message, the less it made sense. For as long as his stream has been online, the waifu counter's methods and prerequisites for what counted as a "waifu" have been a mystery.
Do people have to like him in order to become a waifu? Can only servants become waifus? Apparently not, because somehow the late director Olga Marie was a part of it until she vanished from the counter after her demise.
If anyone can become a waifu, why have the female Chaldean staff he's been interacting with on a constant basis, like MaoMao, not been added to the counter?
So many questions and so many variables, and recently another layer of complexity was added to the equation, since now people he's never met before can also become a "waifu" for Gudako to add to the counter.
For all intents and purposes, after Tamamo Cat joined their party, she should have been the tenth, not the eleventh. Not that he wanted her to be reduced to a number, but this line of thought is just something he had time to ponder after they left the island behind.
Who was the mystery waifu?
"Woah! That is a big garfish!! I can make sashimi with that, or perhaps fried fillets? What do you prefer, Master?" He was brought out of his musings by Tamamo, who hadn't pried her twinkling eyes away from the ocean's surface.
He shrugged at the cat-fox-dog girl, "I can go for either, but I do like fried fish a bit more."
"I'll fry you some fish then! Ah, but we are going to need some high smoke point oil, peanut or canola." Tamamo hummed while she tapped one of her claws at her chin in thought, "Wait, those don't exist yet, so I guess I'll have to use lard or olive oil since we're in Rome… oh! But I don't have any high quality panko…" Tamamo Cat's ears flattened, her mood dropping as she realized they lacked modern cooking essentials.
Seeing the reality of the inconvenience of time travel settle on her, he instinctively patted her head to cheer her up, "it's okay Tamamo, I'll eat whatever you make."
Like the flip of a switch, Tamamo Cat's sadness flipped to happiness and preened under his touch. He took care to make sure he didn't touch her sensitive ears, an action she greatly appreciated as she began to purr.
[Gudao for the love of Arceus, stop petting the pussy!! ]
[Ugh… that was a lame pun. ]
[Don'tTouchMyBuns!: Did you have to word it that way? ]
[Ecruteak_Gal: She's not a cat, she's an eevee pretending to be a meowth. ]
[I still find it very weird he took a literal grown ass woman on a kinky walk on the beach like she was his pet. Pokemaniacs are so fucking cringe bro. ]
[PokeFAN: You judge us only because you do not understand us!! ]
[Dammit, the weirdos showed up. ]
An action that she abruptly stopped when her ears stood up.
She looked to the sky and hummed, "it seems like Lord Tsukiyomi is looking over us during our voyage."
He followed her gaze with a raised brow and saw the moon was fully visible hanging above them even though it was still daytime. If someone had made that statement earlier in his life, he would have assumed they were speaking in hyperbole.
Now though? After discovering that Lady Amaterasu was actually real and had nearly killed him by accident? He was more willing to believe that Lord Tsukiyomi was looking over them on their journey. Whether that was a good omen or bad, well… he had his hopes up considering he was known as a god of the moon, the deity that controlled the tides.
He hoped that at the very least meant they would have a safe voyage. However, the frantic beeping of his wristband dashed those hopes.
"Ritsuka, there's hundreds of life signatures ahead. They are all highly hostile! Get ready for a possible battle!! "
Not a moment after his warning, he heard the sailor who overlooked the horizon above from his crow's nest yell out: "Blockade ahead!!"
As soon as the word "blockade" reached everyone's ears, the surrounding men began to get worked up in a frenzy.
[BattleMANIAC: It's about time something exciting happened! We've been sailing the high seas for so many days it was starting to get boring!! ]
[PerfectlySaneHex: Exciting = bad in Gudao's journey. I'd rather he be boring and safe than exciting but deadly. ]
Well, he was standing at the front of the ship, so he would be able to spot the enemy where he stood.
He squinted his eyes to get a better view of the horizon, and it didn't take long for a small shape to appear on the water's surface.
As they got closer, more and more shapes emerged until he recognized them all as huge, narrow wooden sailing ships, their oars all rowing with a disciplined synchronicity. All of them were headed towards their vessel, with no intent on stopping.
Suddenly, he heard multiple footsteps coming towards him, and when he turned, he saw Mash, Martha, and Siegfried had shown up, "sorry it took us a while to get here, Senpai."
"It's alright Mash, you got here just in time. Look."
Mash and the other servants followed where he was pointing with narrowed eyes, Mash's immediately lit up in recognition.
"Those are Egyptian warships… strange, why are they blockading the sea route to Rome?"
"It doesn't matter they are all headed towards us and have no plans on stopping." Siegfried said as he stared at the distance with narrowed eyes, his hand already on the pommel of his sword.
Suddenly, the ship's oars abruptly stopped, and then one set began to row, turning the ship away from the fleet.
"There you are!" He heard the ship captain's voice calling out to him. The man stopped and gave him a sympathetic look, "Sorry lad, but this is as far as we go. I can't risk my crew against the Egyptian army, we're turning back."
Well, he knew this moment was coming. "I understand, Captain. You and your men can go, we'll stay behind."
The man looked at him like he had just told him the sky was red. "Lad, there's a fine line between being brave and being a fool. Your company may be a band of powerful warriors, but you can't do anything against a large army at sea on a rowboat!"
"Thank you for your concern, Captain, but we already planned ahead of time for this inevitability." He turned to Martha, who was waiting expectantly for his command.
"Martha. It's time to go for a Surf."
Martha's eyes beamed at his words and nodded, "Right."
She then walked towards the side of the ship where the oars had stopped rowing, her heels clacked as she drew near the ship's edge. She lifted her cross spear to the sky and said only a single, yet powerful word.
"Tarasque!"
The ship captain, who had been watching Martha's deliberate walk, violently flinched as a massive turtle dragon emerged from the ether, a loud bellow shaking the very ship to its core.
Men yelled as the beast plopped into the saltwater ocean below, the displaced water creating waves large enough that it pushed the ship slightly away from where Tarasque landed.
"Well I'll be damned…", he turned to the wide-eyed captain, who had the face of a gaping fish at the display.
[Surf'sUp_Brah: Yo! Tarasque knows surf!! Also, talk about making a splash! ]
[The ship captain looks so shellshocked lol. ]
"Thank you for everything, Captain. Safe travels, don't worry. We'll keep them busy so you can escape."
The Captain, to his credit, quickly recovered and gave him a curt nod, "much appreciated lad. May the gods be with you on your wild adventure."
He returned the gesture, then turned to face Mash again, "let's go. We've endangered the captain and his crew for long enough."
"Yes Senpai!" Mash quickly picked him in a princess carry and jumped overboard, landing gracefully on top of the Tarasque's shell.
He wasn't the only one, as Martha landed near them as well, followed by Siegfried but unlike them, he had vanished into spirit form and reappeared right next to Martha.
Then, all eyes turned to Tamamo Cat, who was looking over the railing with hesitation.
"Um…. Cats and water do not mix well…"
He did not know Tamamo Cat for long, but in the short time he's known her, he had easily adapted to her wild manner of speaking.
He still struggled with some of the nonsense she spoke, but in this case, he knew exactly what to say to get her to come with them.
Giving her a perplexed look, he said: "but fish live in the water. How can you fish without getting a bit wet?"
Tamamo looked taken aback by his logic, then nodded in affirmation, "you are right Master. I'll be down in a moment!"
She jumped without warning, her arms and legs spread out in a "belly flop" pose.
"Nyah!!"
He tried to open his mouth to speak, but it was hard to breathe when his face was smothered between two soft boobs.
"Yay! I made a slam dunk! Let's go fishing!!" Tamamo declared as she pulled away from him, his face now feeling warm from the shared body heat he exchanged with Tamamo.
He could feel Martha, Mash, and all of his chat's suspicious gazes boring into him, but he ignored them.
[Burning_Jealousy: She did that on purpose, didn't she? ]
[PerfectlySaneHex: Yep. She is. Damn perverted pokeManiac. ]
[Said the HexMANIAC. ]
[PerfectlySaneHex: Hey, I am not a Maniac, I am perfectly sane thank you very much! ]
A sudden spray of water blew out as Tarasque huffed, likely from how crowded his back was with people.
Martha bent down and patted the dragon's shell, which calmed it down.
"Is Tarasque going to be okay carrying so many people?" Mash asked Martha, concerned that they were being a burden to the dragon for turning it into their ride.
He shook his head, "He's going to be fine, although it would be in our best interest to head to shore quickly. Tarasque dislikes salt water."
Romani's voice spoke through his wristband once more to add in his two cents, "Ah right, Tarasque was a freshwater river dragon, so that makes sense. "
"Now then, how should we handle our guests?" Martha asked as she stared at the wooden Egyptian ships.
He frowned at the enemy vessels and then looked back at the captain's ship, which had already fully turned around and was starting to run away. If they allowed the enemy ships to keep going, they would likely board and kill the captain and his crew, which meant that they would have to stop them, "I'd like to avoid causing unnecessary deaths if possible… we've already been complacent with such things as it is." He said.
"Then, I suppose disabling their sails would be the best way we can ensure the captain and his ship can escape while also minimizing casualties." Martha narrowed her eyes.
Martha twirled her spear in her hand, then pointed it at the ship.
"I will need to concentrate."
Martha's spear lit up; its brightness flooded the area and blinded everyone.
Then, as soon as it came, it vanished, but only for a brief moment.
The light reappeared with a vengeance on top of the enemy ship's sails, the force of the explosion splintering the mast of the first ship in two.
The majestic sail fell over and crashed on top of the ship, effectively rendering the ship unable to use the wind to move. Martha wasn't done, however, as she continued to use that same attack multiple times, until all the ships within range were disabled.
The ships that were not in range, seeing their fellow vessels partly destroyed, began to row one side of their ship's oars so that they could make a quick retreat.
"Everyone, Tarasque is a very fast swimmer, so brace yourselves, now go!!!"
"RAAAHH" Tarasque went from zero to sixty in a fraction of a second, causing him to nearly fall on his butt as the dragon turned into a speedboat.
The sudden change in speed caused him to stumble, but luckily, Mash was there to catch him, preventing him from falling into the ocean like an idiot.
Tarasque, unbothered by his well-being, sped up even faster, and then the moment he got close to the ships, he jumped.
"RAAHHHH" The dragon stuck out his clawed hand and raked the side of the boat, destroying the oars and part of the wooden hull as his claws sunk and ripped the hardwood into splinters.
However, what goes up must come down, and unfortunately for them, Tarasque was now accelerating down to the ocean.
"NYAAAHH YOU STUPID LIZARD!!! I'M NOT WEARING A WHITE T-SHIRT!!!"
[AYO?!! ]
[Heart0f6old: Wow, I didn't expect that, and now I can't get that wet t-shirt image out of my head. Tamamo Cat continues to be the gift that keeps on giving. :Umu Emote: ]
[DragoonRuleZ: Are a woman's breasts the only thing you can think of? Why not just put your time to better use and go back to being the champion? ]
[Heart0f6old:Tarasque just jumped really high, I bet he can learn waterfall if Martha really tried to train him. ]
[DragoonRuleZ:Don't ignore me Gold!! ]
[Awkward... ]
He could not hear himself scream out in panic, partly because of Tarasque but also because Tamamo was screaming bloody murder as they plunked into the ocean with a loud splash.
He took a deep breath, just in time to stop the rushing ocean water from flooding his lungs, and they submerged within the waves for a moment.
The tranquil, cool hum of the Mediterranean Sea invaded his ears for a few seconds before they dissipated with a swish as his head broke the water's surface.
He took a breath, and the cold air hit him.
"Apologies Master, Tarasque got a bit carried away, and he slipped into old habits." Martha apologized to him like a mother would after their kid did something to a stranger.
'It's fine, I don't mind getting a bit wet-"
Mash suddenly got in front of him, her shield raised. A heavy object hit her shield with a loud clang before it fell into the ocean with a loud plop.
Turning to face where the giant arrow came from, his eyes widened as dozens of ships began to close in on them.
"Get down, Senpai!" Mash put his head down and stopped a volley of giant arrows from hitting him.
[Ngl, as dangerous as this is, its kind of pathetic how these guys think they can do anything to Mash and the others with their normie arrows and rocks. ]
[Yeah, but at the end of the day, they still have to be on guard. One slip up, and Gudao dies, so their superior durability means jackshit. ]
[TheIcePryce donated100 bits]
[Be wary, Ballistas can also use stones as ammunition. Make sure that you watch out for ricochets when you break those with your shield. ]
"On it!!" Mash said, her posture changing just in time to react to the prophesied stone barreling towards them.
It shattered on impact, but it was not the last one, as the frequency of the shots grew more intense with Tarasque moving closer to the ships.
Dozens more arrows were shot, many of them being slapped away before they could hit him.
They were rather relentless, and the worst part was that more and more ships started to show up, all of them determined to fight.
Siegfried caught an arrow mid-flight, crushed it in his grip, then tossed it into the ocean.
"Master, I understand your wish to minimize casualties… but we'll be overwhelmed at this rate. Please, allow me to clear the way."
He pursed his lips, wanting to refuse the request, but as he saw even more ships joining the battle, the answer became clear. The longer the fight prolonged, the likelihood of his death increased. With a heavy heart, he relayed his command.
"Go ahead."
[ThunderCles: Oh shit! Operation sword hyperbeam was just greenlit by the rizzler himself!! ]
[Those poor bastards. ]
[BattleMANIAC: Let's FUCKING GO!!! ]
Siegfried nodded, then he looked at the dragon below him, "I'm sorry Tarasque, but I am going to use my noble phantasm. I will be careful not to hit you, but still please brace yourself."
The dragon let out a grunt of annoyance, which Siegfried took as the dragon saying: 'just get it over with already,' or at least that's what it sounded like to him.
Siegfried took a dramatic step forwards, then brought Balmung close to his face.
His body swirled with magical energy as he began his chant.
A pillar of ethereal light pierced the sky, the sheer power of the winds that sword generated created enough force to make waves around them.
[৻( •̀ ᗜ •́ ৻)] x 635
Tarasque shivered under the immense anti-draconic power but relaxed as Martha comforted him by petting his shell.
Siegfried's sword tipped sideways, the ethereal energy lashing out as he said the name of his noble phantasm.
"Balmung!!"
Siegfried made a horizontal slash, and a sickle of pure ether crashed into the masts of all the ships surrounding them and cut them down in one fell swoop.
BOOM.
A massive explosion detonated behind the ships, creating a wall of water that threw the crippled vessels into disarray.
Many crashed into each other, breaking their oars in the process while others got carried away by the massive current. Yet somehow none of the ships disintegrated into smithereens like he expected.
"The path is clear, we should move before more enemies are drawn to the explosion." Siegfried said as he put away his sword as if he hadn't just destroyed an army like they were ants.
[Gloria2Galar: Absolute fuckin' cinema. Well done @ Sumanai. ]
[Did you guys forget that he fired that thing on a cluster of actual, living, people? ]
[Gloria2Galar: People thon were tryin tae kill Gudao an everyone ridin tarasque's back. Sae fuck aff wi yer whiny pretentious protests ye prick!! ]
[CasCu: :Leonardo DiCaprio Raises Wine glass emote:]
"I didn't know you could use your noble phantasm like that Siegfried, usually you or servants with a similar attack slash down whenever you use it." King Arthur had a similar attack, and she made a downward slash movement. Even Boudica did the same before she blasted her light attacks at them, too.
"Yes, that is how most people use such attacks, as it is meant for a single opponent. But against multiples, I like to mix it up." Siegfried sounded a bit proud when he said that.
Martha patted her dragon, "Come on Tarasque, just a bit more, and we'll get out of this saltwater."
Tarasque grumbled but persisted in his swim to the shore.
After a bit more swimming, no new ships showed up, and it was understandable why that would be the case, as they were far too close to the beach for large ships to sail here without getting stuck.
Unfortunately, there was another army waiting for them, well, it was the same army but all of them were lined up at the beach, waiting for them to get in range.
"You've got to be kidding me." He was surprised by the rapid response from the enemy.
[They really don't quit, do they?]
[Lanette34: How do they even know they were coming?! I thought they only had birds and snail mail for delivering messages, how'd they assemble their army so fast?!]
[GARcher: Most likely, they have on board mages relaying messages to others inland. It seems like their leader is savvy enough to use the supernatural to give themselves an edge in battle. ]
[No fair! Cheaters!! ]
The distant shapes of the soldiers pointed their bows high and shot their arrows.
Mash, seeing the wave of arrows descend towards them, brought him in closer to her body and raised her shield.
Dozens upon dozens of arrows hit Mash's shield, but compared to the rain of arrows that Archer shot at them in Fuyuki, this rain of arrows felt more like a gentle mist than a downpour.
The smoothness of Tarasque's swimming turned rough as his feet landed on the sandy beach.
Men scattered as Martha's dragon stormed the beach, his roars so loud that it caused the air in his lungs to vibrate.
The men screamed in fear as Tarasque chased them, his monstrous appearance scaring them to near death as he drew nearer to them.
However, contrary to what they might have feared, Tarasque didn't stop to rip open their guts and eat them alive as they expected, as it threw itself into the river.
"NOT AGAIN!! NYAA!" Tamamo Cat yelled just moments before Tarasque splashed into the surprisingly saltless water.
The fresh waters of the river washed away the stinging in his eyes, which had resulted from the earlier saltwater soak.
When they resurfaced, the first sound he heard was Tamamo yelling bloody murder at Tarasque.
"NYAA!! STOP DOING THAT!! OR ELSE I'LL TURN YOU INTO GUMBO YOU OVERSIZED TURTLE!!!!"
✦✧✦
Roman Capital, Rome, 60 AD
Nero POV
"Locusta, how are our current grain stores holding up?" She asked her friend, Locusta, who was currently shuffling through the parchment in her hands with a jagged frown on her face. And she meant that literally, as her teeth resembled a shark.
"We can hold out for a bit longer, Emperor Nero. We were lucky that we had enough grain stored before the war began, but should the war continue for too long, we won't be able to sustain the Cura annonae."
She let out a sigh of relief, "good. I would be a poor emperor if I could not provide my Roman citizens with grain to eat."
As much as she hated the fact she lost most of her empire, it has ironically worked in her favor since they now have fewer mouths to feed. Though her heart still bleeds for her citizens across the vast lands of Rome that depended on their monthly grain, alas, they shall have to wait for them to repel the invading barbarians and liberate them.
Konstantinos's death was still fresh in her mind, and she hasn't been able to mourn him properly since Simon returned with Jing Ke a few days ago. She wanted to honor him, to immortalize him as a god of Rome who defended Rome and its people; however, there's been too much to do.
The Senate has been complaining about the growing Christian influence in her court, but the senators are too ignorant to understand that these Christians, like Konstantinos and Charlemagne, have come to aid Rome in its time of crisis! They focus too much on details, which will matter little if Rome falls! Heck, their overwhelming power alone was the reason they'd been allowed to live their luxurious lives in the first place!!
"Emperor Nero, how are you doing?" She snapped out of her thoughts and looked at Locusta. Despite the hood she wore covering most of her face, she could see the concern in her eyes.
However, before she could answer, a loud stomach rumble echoed in her throne room.
"Umu. It would seem my hunger has distracted me. Come, let us not speak of such tiresome politics, let us go eat, " Unfortunately, the gods decided they had other plans in mind for her as Jing Ke burst into her throne room.
"Emperor Nero!! An army of tens of thousands of barbarians headed our way!" Jing Ke reported, her face grave and bearing no signs of a joke.
"Uwah, that's a lot of piggies," her eyes shifted to another of her generals, arguably one of her more insufferable ones, the red-headed super-idol that called herself Elizabeth Bathory. The tone she used sounded nonchalant, but she could hear the wavering in her heart when her messenger announced the numbers of barbarians invading their lands.
"Unfortunate but to be expected. That so-called goddess likely had reinforcements with her. Jing Ke and I were lucky to escape before that main force arrived." her friend Simon Magus said with disdain in his voice. Just like her, he had gotten close to Konstantinos and had not had proper time to mourn.
Truly, Konstantinos's death left a greater impact than anyone had expected.
While Konstantinos's last stand did deal a blow to their army's morale, it also shed light on the true identity of their enemy, all thanks to Konstantinos and Simon's special magic connection.
The heretic goddess, Zenobia.
She still didn't understand how a mortal could steal divinity from a goddess, but she didn't care. She has committed an unforgivable sin! By the end of this war, she was going to rip it away from her and give it back to the goddess she stole it from, one way or the other.
"Regrettably, our meal will have to wait. We have a city to defend!" She declared, and at her command, her generals nodded and went out to rally the army to mount a counterattack.
She noticed Jing Ke was about to head out but stopped her, "Jing Ke, are you well enough to fight?"
She found it quite incredible that Jing Ke and the people like her are durable enough to survive a devastating wound to the stomach. Yet, she still felt some guilt in sending a wounded woman to what could be her death.
However, her concerns were dismissed with a smile, "thank you for your concern Emperor Nero, but so long as I breathe, I can still fight."
Jing Ke stated this fact plainly, and she had no choice but to acknowledge it with a sharp nod. She knew Jing Ke was a woman of duty, an assassin who would rather die while performing her mission than live in regret over her failure.
"Very well. Your determination to protect Rome is greatly appreciated and will be rewarded should you survive this encounter."
She stood up from her seat, "Now let us show these barbarians the brutality and power of our glorious Rome!!"
She will be damned if she lets her Rome fall here!
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New Chatters:
PokeFAN: A pokemaniac who loves cosplaying as different pokemon, but he has a fondness for slowpokes.
Surf'sUp_Brah: Brawly, the fighting type gymleader from Hoenn. He's a surfer bro.
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AN: Shorter chappie today, Last week's chappie took a ton out of me. Also, I wasn't feeling well the last two days cuz my body reacted poorly to a vaccine shot I took on Friday.
I still find it pretty wild that I now consider 4k chappies "short" chapters lol. 4k words was the best I could write in two weeks during consecutive good days when I wrote my other fic.
My Expert in explaining Bullshit with more bullshit: Flowerman (He helped me plan the outline of this arc).
Anyways, hope you enjoyed, and I'll see you guys next week. Leave a comment and a like, they keep my motivation going, and I am gonna need it. I still have a lot of Septem left, on top of 6 more singularities, to go.