"Come, these are some fresh Sunsettias my subordinates just picked. Lady Guuji, please, have a taste."
Taking a full plate of Sunsettias from his subordinate, Bai Luo personally placed them on the table in front of Yae Miko. The emphasis here was on the word personally. From that moment on, this unremarkable plate of fruit had been imbued with a very "special" power.
Although this wasn't the first time Bai Luo had been outmaneuvered, the feeling of being played and then somehow feeling like he hadn't lost was driving him crazy. So, he decided to pull out his big guns.
What? The Erhu?
Bai Luo's Erhu was a divine sound, capable of making all creation bow and the gods themselves sigh in admiration. A mere fox spirit wasn't worthy of hearing his music. His Erhu was reserved only for kindred spirits. *One tune to break the heart; at the edge of the world, we are neighbors.*
"How thoughtful. Just put them aside for now."
Yae Miko didn't even glance at the Sunsettias. Instead, she held the photos Bai Luo had provided in one hand and used her chopsticks to eat fried tofu with the other.
As long as there was fried tofu in front of her, everything else was a mere cloud in the sky. Bai Luo felt a pang of regret for serving the tofu first.
"Did you take all of these?"
Examining the photos again, Yae Miko nodded with satisfaction. The photos themselves weren't particularly artistic; they were simply... characteristic. But it was precisely those characteristics that made the little doggy look exceptionally alluring.
Looking at the photo where he was leaning down, Yae Miko almost felt as if she had grown a "club" of her own—stiff and ready, just like Arataki Itto's Greatsword. It was what one might call "phantom limb syndrome."
"Who else but me? Currently, this little doggy only strikes such poses in front of me."
Bai Luo discreetly picked up a Sunsettia, rubbed it against his clothes a few times, and then placed it back in a spot where Yae Miko could easily reach it.
"Are you interested in a position at the Yae Publishing House? We offer excellent benefits," she said. After seeing the Sketch of Dihua Marsh on the desk earlier, Yae Miko had recognized Bai Luo's talent. Once again, she couldn't help but feel a lingering sense of regret.
If only he were Inazuman.
Normally, having read his work, she should have recognized his handwriting.
Unfortunately, Bai Luo had written Legend of the Condor Heroes in Liyue script rather than Inazuman. Even if Yae Miko knew Liyue characters, how could a fox from Inazuma decipher a script so messy that even a Liyue local couldn't read it?
Moreover, when his works arrived in Inazuma via Beidou's Crux Fleet, they were famous for their "illustrations." Naturally, Yae Miko didn't think to analyze them as handwriting.
"How about I take a set of portraits for the Lady Guuji first?" Bai Luo took out his special Kamera, posing as if he were about to snap a photo.
"Oh, please. Those Fontaine trinkets don't work on us Yokai. If you take a picture, you'll likely only see a fox spirit of 'unparalleled wisdom and beauty,' not my human form."
Yae Miko chewed her fried tofu, her voice full of disdain for the Kamera. She made it sound convincing, but if Bai Luo hadn't spent so much time taking screenshots of her in-game, he might have actually believed her "beast-language" nonsense.
"So, you want to publish these photos in Monthly Idle Matters? I should warn you, if it's just this one set, the payout won't be very high."
Setting down her chopsticks, Yae Miko began to gather the photos as if to keep them.
Despite claiming the payout would be low, she was actually trying to goad Bai Luo into getting more—ideally, she wanted photos of that Divine Priestess as well.
If that child saw herself in the gossip pages of Monthly Idle Matters, she'd probably jump with rage. Though, if she were willing to call Miko "Elder Sister," well... she might be persuaded to pull the photos.
"Actually, it's not just a photoshoot," Bai Luo said, handing Yae Miko a promotional slogan he had prepared.
As he did, he nudged the Sunsettias closer to her again.
Damn it! Why won't you eat them?! Eat!
But Yae Miko completely ignored his subtle movements, her eyes fixed on the slogan.
Have you heard of Miss Hina?
If you have troubles, worries, or secrets, you can write a letter to Miss Hina.
She will guide your soul out of the fog.
She will liberate you from your sins.
She will bring salvation to your heart.
She will give you the perfect answer.
Miss Hina: Your best soul sister.
"I see how it is."
Seeing the letter, the cunning Yae Miko immediately understood why Gorou would rather abandon his dignity to wear those clothes.
Intelligence.
Because of the Sakoku Decree and the Vision Hunt Decree, the people were full of grievances. If such an outlet existed, they would undoubtedly pour their hearts out.
These words would either become powerful weapons for the Resistance against the Shogunate or be analyzed for useful intel. To put it simply, this was a conspiracy.
"This alone is enough for me to hand you over to the Tenryou Commission," she said, waving the flyer and resting her chin on her hand, waiting for Bai Luo to provide a suitable explanation.
"I don't believe for a second that your Yae Publishing House doesn't have an audit process."
Bai Luo could see she was just looking for ways to make things difficult for him, but he wasn't afraid. As he said, he didn't believe she would let sensitive information leak to the Resistance.
However, knowing Yae Miko, she would probably leak just enough harmless info to make the "little doggy" work even harder for her own amusement.
Poor Gorou, being played like a fiddle by these two villains while feeling proud of himself. One could only say...
When it came to "acting like a dog," Bai Luo was far superior to Gorou. Besides, foxes are canines too.
"Not just that. I've planned offline meet-and-greets, handshake events, half-day dining sessions, one-day dates, and online 'pen pal' tiers. Most of these activities will be reserved exclusively for the person at the top of the 'Miss Hina Fan Rankings.' This will trigger the competitive nature of the fans and squeeze every last drop of value out of the Dog General."
At Bai Luo's signal, a Fatui subordinate grunted as he hauled in a blackboard. On it were various elaborate plans, detailing how Gorou would react, what he would say, and how to counter him.
"Ahem... don't look at this part." Bai Luo tore off a piece of paper in the corner that had the words [Pink-Haired Fox] written on it. He casually crumpled it into a ball and stuffed it into his pocket.
Yae Miko: "..."
Do you think I'm blind?
"The effect is promising. But for the offline events, how do you plan to get the General to show up?"
Having finished her tofu, Yae Miko finally noticed the Sunsettias. She tossed one into the air and caught it, voicing her concern.
"With you from the Grand Narukami Shrine and me from the Fatui handling it personally, getting him there will be child's play. Besides... we'll just arrange for the #1 spot on the rankings to be filled by someone who isn't exactly the 'sharpest tool in the shed.' Who would even notice? As for the candidate for that top spot... I already have someone in mind."
"Oh? Could it be...?"
Perhaps it was the synergy between two kindred spirits, but as they spoke of a certain "dim-witted" fellow, a burst of laughter echoed in both their minds simultaneously.
Hahahahahaha! Arataki "The One and Only" Itto was here!
The "Top Whale Fan" and "Miss Hina."
Heh, the two of us really do 'stink of the same sewer'... ahem, I mean, we really are kindred spirits.
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