Noah's laughter echoed through the rocky landscape, cold and mocking.
Danzo's face turned as black as the bottom of a pot. The veins on his forehead bulged as if about to burst with fury. His fists dug into the earth, his fingers clawing at the rock.
—You spend your entire miserable life like a worm writhing in shit, wallowing in your own self-pity —Noah continued, unfazed—. Whining because my great-uncle didn't choose you as his successor and Third Hokage. But did it ever enter that cow-shit-filled head of yours that Tobirama didn't choose you precisely because of your pathetic cowardice?
He leaned down, bringing his face close to Danzo's.
—The Second Hokage knew you didn't have the balls to put the village's safety above your own.
—Mmm! Mmmmm! —Danzo's groans were more desperate now, his eyes bloodshot.
Noah listened to the sounds, tilted his head as if deciphering a code, and then nodded with feigned understanding.
—Don't get me wrong. I don't have that conviction myself, to risk my life to save others. But there are three differences between you and me, and why I despise you.
He raised three fingers and waved them in front of Danzo's face.
—First: I do not wish, nor have I ever wished, for any position of authority. For me, political power cannot compare in any way to personal power. I enjoy my freedom too much to put chains on myself in the form of responsibilities I consider unnecessary.
He folded one finger.
—Second: unlike you, I have enough ingenuity to create plans that can succeed. I always try not to leave any loose ends. And even then, I do not act without being aware that I have enough strength to back up my actions in case something goes wrong.
He folded another finger.
—Third, and the biggest difference between us: I recognize my selfishness. As I said before, I don't want to be tied down and have to take responsibility for thousands of people. Therefore, they are not my obligation, and I have no reason to sacrifice myself for them. Except for my sister and my grandmother, the rest of the village are like ants to me.
Noah's smile widened.
—Unlike you, who spend all your time telling yourself in the mirror that everything you do, no matter how vile, you do for the good of the village. But the truth is that you are nothing more than a coward hiding behind a mask of patriotism.
He straightened up from the man's back, stretching lazily.
—But let's not get sidetracked. Let's continue with the list of your stupidities, which is long and entertaining.
He began to walk around Danzo, his steps marking a leisurely pace.
After the Third Shinobi War, the Stone Village and the Leaf Village had signed peace. The remaining guerrilla movements in Amegakure were being gradually pacified by two factions. On one side was Hanzo the Salamander, trying to pacify the territory and prevent another large-scale war. On the other side were the original Akatsuki, trying to pacify the region through peaceful negotiations.
Konoha was in a weakened state after the war. It urgently needed a period of peace to regain the strength and stability of its nation.
But this hydrocephalic condom before him came up with the brilliant idea of disguising his soldiers as Stone shinobi to carry out false-flag attacks. His objective: to rekindle the war. Why? Because in his reality-detached mind, he seriously believed that a Konoha weakened after a prolonged period of war, combined with his supposed ingenuity, would lead Konoha to dominate the other nations.
But Danzo's master plans to dominate the world all went very wrong.
If Noah could be considered someone extremely cunning who could achieve more than five different objectives with a single move, then Danzo is the antithesis of that concept. With a single move, he managed to ruin more than five different things.
The guy orchestrated a scenario for both Hanzo and Akatsuki to kill each other. But what did he do afterwards? Instead of checking that the job had been done properly, he fled as soon as he was discovered by Hanzo. Consequently, neither Hanzo nor the Akatsuki died.
But as a result of this conflict, Yahiko died. And that event drove Akatsuki to become the most dangerous criminal organization in the world. An organization that, by the way, has an irreconcilable hatred for Konoha due to the death of one of its original leaders.
With a single move, Danzo lost as an ally the most powerful shinobi of the time —because a couple of years later Pain would kill Hanzo—, made himself and his entire village enemies with Pain, and the reason for all this —to destabilize Stone and provoke a war— ended up failing because Akatsuki allied with Stone, allowing it to regain stability over its territory instead of losing it.
With a single move, Danzo created multiple problems for himself and gained absolutely nothing. Zero. Zilch. Nothing at all.
That's not to mention his other stupid plans. For example: isolating an entire clan in a lousy ghetto, generating in them resentment toward their village to such an extent that they had no outlet for their frustration and anger other than to plan a coup d'état.
And once he found out about this matter, instead of following a more peaceful plan like the one proposed by Uchiha Shisui —using Kotoamatsukami to brainwash the clan's high-ranking members and get that idea of rebellion out of their minds— the guy stole Shisui's eyes and ordered Itachi to massacre all the Uchiha.
Noah brought a hand to his forehead, as if his head hurt from remembering so many stupidities.
—A clan that could perfectly make up more than 40% of Konoha's total strength. And this guy seriously weakened the village because of his own paranoia.
He started walking again while recalling Danzo Shimura's other brilliant decisions.
Funding Orochimaru. A transsexual snake that only the stupidest of the stupid —or someone with such an altered perception of reality that they thought they could control Orochimaru— would trust. Danzo gave him enough of Konoha's resources to found his own village. With that village, Orochimaru created an army with which he attacked Konoha and ended up killing the Third Hokage and many civilians.
And finally, the guy couldn't think of a better idea than to spread the news that Naruto —at that time just a child who couldn't defend himself— was the jinchūriki of the Kyūbi.
Leaving aside the fact that it ruined the poor child's childhood, because the entire village still remembered the tragic event caused by the Kyūbi in which many people died, Danzo with that move exposed the most powerful weapon of his village, a jinchūriki, to the other villages. Without considering that for the other villages it would be a very tempting idea to kidnap the jinchūriki of the most powerful bijū, who was still a child without the ability to use the power of his beast?
—Seriously, Danzo. You are so incompetent you should win an award.
Noah was silent for a moment, watching the man bent over on all fours trembling under his weight.
—Heh heh —a slow smile spread across his face—. I think I know how to deal with you now.
He patted Danzo's head with an almost paternal gesture.
The seal over Danzo's mouth dissipated. His body regained mobility. And the man blinded by fury and humiliation, lunged at Noah with a kunai in his hand.