Old Friends Bar
"So here's the deal—things have been feeling super weird lately," Ted began, diving into the whole backstory. "A few days ago, I went to my dentist. While he's checking my mouth, he randomly goes, 'Bet you're more used to saying this than hearing it, huh, Ted Mosby?'
Then today, Wendy out of nowhere insists on getting me water, like she's worried I'm dehydrated.
Oh, and some energy drink company called asking if I'd endorse their stuff…"
"Was it Red Bull?" Adam cut in, barely holding back a laugh. "If it was, that'd make total sense. I mean, 'Your energy's beyond your imagination,' right? Fits you to a T!" 😏
"Hahaha!"
Matthew and the gang burst out laughing.
Red Bull was already a global energy drink titan by now.
The name itself screams vitality and unstoppable vibes.
"No way!" Ted shot back. "What legit company hires an action movie star for that? Only you'd come up with something so ridiculous!"
"Shame, though," Adam said, grinning. "A legendary action star who peaked right out the gate? That could've been a genius move.
Imagine the cred he'd bring—sales would explode!
Sure, people might sneakily buy it and trash-talk it in public, but behind closed doors? They'd be hauling it home by the truckload.
Emmm.
Just a bunch of shy, silent fans." 😜
"Anyway," Ted went on, "at first, I just thought it was odd, but I had no clue what was up. I asked around, and nobody would spill…"
"Until Barney showed up with a box of DVDs," Lily chimed in, smirking. "Title? Welcome Aboard the Boeing (Bow-ying) Plane, starring Ted Mosby as the pilot!"
"What the hell?!" Ted yelled. "That's when it hit me—someone's been jacking my name!"
"And it gets way more embarrassing!" Lily said, practically cackling.
"Spill it already!" Adam urged, laughing too.
"So this 'Ted Mosby' even did an interview with Action Movie Weekly—A-to-W," Matthew said, barely keeping it together. "Guess who they actually interviewed?"
"Obviously Ted," Adam said, cracking up.
The action star just borrowed Ted's name—he wouldn't slap his real name or number on the credits.
So how'd the interviewers track him down?
Simple: they looked up "Ted Mosby" in the phone book and called him.
Like the Terminator zapping back in time, flipping through the directory, and taking out every "Sarah Connor" one by one.
No misses, no mercy.
And "Ted Mosby" isn't exactly a common name.
So Action Movie Weekly dialed up, and boom—straight to our Ted.
"Yup, him!" Matthew confirmed, and the whole crew lost it again.
"They just said 'A-to-W'!" Ted groaned, flailing. "I thought it was Architectural Vision Weekly—same initials! It's a huge deal in my field, and I'm working on this big project, so I figured they wanted to interview me about that!"
"And then?" Adam asked, leaning in eagerly.
"Then he took the interview," Lily jumped in, barely containing herself. "Here's how it went down…"
She launched into a dramatic reenactment.
Ted got the call, covered the receiver, and whispered to Lily and the gang, "It's Architectural Vision Weekly!"
Then he did a little happy lean-back and told the reporter, "Wow! I've been a huge fan since I was a kid!"
The guy on the other end paused, thrown off. "Whoa, that's… intense. Anyway, I'm calling to talk about your latest work."
"Oh, that?" Ted said, playing modest. "It's not just me—I mean, I've got at least three partners on this."
"Whoa, a multi-player scene? Love that!" the reporter said, clearly pleased.
"Yeah, I'm pumped for it," Ted rambled on, oblivious to the double meanings flying everywhere. "They're gonna wear me out—those guys are top-tier!"
"Guys? Oh, this just got juicy!" The reporter's excitement shot through the roof.
"That interview went on for, like, twenty minutes!" Ted wailed.
The reporter, a stickler for authenticity who wanted to give the public the "real" celebrity scoop, published every word of their gloriously awkward exchange.
Here's a snippet from the article:
Action movie legend and rising star Ted Mosby sets sky-high standards for his latest work. In his own words, "I've lost count of how many nights I've spent slumped over the desk…"
Adam was already dying laughing.
Emmm.
That reporter really stuck to his guns.
No need for wild embellishments—Ted handed him pure gold.
He didn't just lock the car doors; he welded shut every door to the brain-cave.
Subtle chaos is the real chaos! 😆
The gang kept chatting about Ted's wild "misadventure" for a bit, clutching their stomachs until they had to drop it.
Any more, and Adam would've had to haul Lily and the rest to the hospital from laughing too hard.
"Matthew, what's this 'serious stuff' you mentioned?" Adam asked, shifting gears.
"Oh, right!" Matthew said, his face lighting up with genuine joy. "We're planning to buy a house!"
"No way, really?" Adam glanced at Lily, who was smiling awkwardly but politely. "Congrats! Have you already bought it?"
"Not yet," Lily said, shaking her head. "Matthew fell in love with this apartment. We were supposed to play it cool, haggle a bit, you know? But he got so excited, he hugged me and yelled, 'Babe, I love this place—let's buy it!' Totally blew our leverage."
"And then?" Adam asked, narrowing his eyes.
He remembered how Matthew and Lily got scammed on a house deal once.
Originally, he'd planned to nudge them toward buying next to Chandler and Monica's place—perfect happy neighbors.
But with their jobs and personalities, they weren't into suburban houses. They wanted a downtown apartment—closer to work and the bar scene they loved.
Suburbs were too quiet for their vibe.
Adam mentioned it a couple times but let it go.
It's their house—they should pick what they want.
Still, even if he wasn't meddling in their choice, no way was he letting them get conned.
"So you've bought it already?"
"Nah," Matthew said. "I was ready to jump, but Lily wanted to run it by you guys first. Before I could even call, our real estate agent heard your name, asked if we knew you, and told us to hold off. She said she'd show us a few more places before we decide."
"She knows you, I think," Lily added.
"What's her name?" Adam asked, intrigued.
"Janice Litman," Matthew and Lily said in unison.
"O-M-G!" Adam couldn't help letting out the classic Janice shriek.
"Exactly!" Matthew and Lily's eyes lit up. "That's her!"
Her vibe was that unmistakable—one iconic squeal, and the whole world knew it was Janice.
What a wild coincidence.
Like the saying goes: No coincidence, no story.
And here it was, right on cue.
P.S.: Wishing all you readers a Happy New Year's Eve and a roaring Year of the Ox! Starting midnight tomorrow, your energy's gonna blow your minds—everyone'll be screaming O-M-G!
(End of Chapter)