Chapter 59:
– Blake –
The house was ours. Officially, keys-in-hand ours.
Hestia clung to my arm as we stepped through the front door, her grip tight enough that I could feel the soft press of her chest against my bicep even through my shirt.
She had been practically vibrating with excitement since we picked up the keys from the Guild representative that morning, and now that we were actually standing inside, her crystal blue eyes were darting around the empty rooms like she was trying to memorize every crack in the walls and every beam of sunlight that fell through the windows.
Bell stepped in behind us and froze on the threshold. His red eyes went wide, his jaw dropping open as he slowly turned in place, taking in the high ceilings, the clean wooden floors, the staircase leading up to the second and third levels. "This... this is so big," he breathed. "This is amazing. This is really where we're going to live?"
The kid looked like he was about to cry, and honestly, I couldn't blame him. From what little he had told us on the walk over, he had been sleeping in alleyways and cheap hostels for weeks while trying to find a Familia that would take him.
Being handed a warm bed in a three-story house with a goddess and a Level Six was probably short-circuiting whatever expectations he had left.
Hestia released my arm just long enough to rise up on her toes and press a tender kiss to my cheek. Her lips lingered for a second, and when she pulled back, her smile could have lit the whole neighborhood.
Then she turned to Bell with that same radiant warmth and placed her hands on her hips. "Welcome home, Bell," she said gently. "We'll do your Falna ceremony a little later tonight, okay? I want it to be special, and I want you settled in first."
Bell bowed so fast I thought he was going to headbutt the floor. "Thank you, Lady Hestia! Thank you so much!"
"But first," I said, clapping my hands together once, "we've got something important to take care of."
Bell straightened up and looked at me with bright, eager eyes. "What is it, Big Bro Blake? Training? Dungeon preparation?"
"Nah, we have to set up all the furniture."
He looked around the empty house. "What... furniture?" he asked slowly.
I grinned and pulled a handful of storage scrolls from my jacket pocket, spreading them across the floor in a neat row. Bell stared at the small paper rectangles with polite confusion, clearly not understanding why I was laying stationery on the ground instead of answering his question.
I pressed my palm to the first scroll and pushed a thread of chakra into the seal.
The scroll erupted in a puff of white smoke with a soft pop, and when it cleared, the massive oak dining table Hestia had picked out yesterday was sitting in the middle of the room like it had always been there.
Bell screamed. "WHAT?! HOW?!"
I unsealed the next scroll. Another puff of smoke, and a set of matching chairs appeared around the table. Then the next one. A plush green rug unfurled itself across the living room floor. Then the couch, sturdy and wide with thick cushions, the one Hestia had tested by flopping onto it six separate times in the shop before declaring it worthy.
Bell's head was whipping back and forth. "How did you do that?!" he demanded, rushing over to the dining table and running his hands across the surface as if checking whether it was an illusion. "Is this magic? How did you fit an entire couch inside a tiny piece of paper?! And a dining room table! That table is bigger than me!"
Hestia sidled up beside me and looped her arm through mine again, pressing into my side with a smug little smile. "My Blake is just amazing like that," she said, tilting her chin up with pride. She patted my arm affectionately, then pointed a stern finger at Bell. "But this is a Familia secret, understand? You don't go telling anyone about the scrolls."
Bell snapped to attention and nodded so hard his white hair flopped over his eyes. "Yes, Lady Hestia! I won't tell a soul! Familia secret! Got it!"
I snorted. The kid was so earnest it was almost painful.
Still, I had a feeling our little "Familia secret" had an expiration date of about three days, considering I had used these scrolls in roughly ten different shops across Orario yesterday.
If the gossip networks in this city worked anything like the ones in Konoha, every adventurer and their grandmother would know about it by the end of the week.
I decided not to mention that to Hestia. She was too happy right now.
"Alright," I said, rolling my shoulders and walking over to the couch. I bent down, got my hands under the frame, and lifted the entire thing off the ground in one smooth motion. It was heavy by normal standards, maybe three hundred pounds of solid wood and dense cushioning, but my body barely registered the strain. "Where do you want this, my goddess?"
Hestia's cheeks flushed pink at the title, the way they always did, and she scurried across the room with her twin tails bouncing behind her. She planted herself in the center of the living area, spread her arms wide like a tiny orchestra conductor, and pointed imperiously at the wall facing the hearth. "There! No, wait." She shuffled two steps to the left. "There! Actually..." She tilted her head, squinted, then shuffled back to the right. "There. Final answer!"
I carried the couch over and set it down where she indicated, gently enough not to scuff the floor.
Behind me, Bell was attempting to move one of the heavier lounging chairs across the room. He had both hands locked around it, his feet braced against the floor, his face turning a concerning shade of red as he strained with everything he had.
The chair moved about four inches. "Hnnngh... this is... really... heavy..." he grunted through clenched teeth, the legs squealing against the wood.
I bit back a laugh. The chairs were pretty big. Probably sixty or seventy pounds each. Nothing unreasonable for a trained adventurer, but Bell didn't have his Falna yet. Right now he was just a regular kid with regular muscles trying to wrestle furniture that outweighed his ambition.
"You've got it, Bell," I said encouragingly, hefting the entire bookshelf Hestia had fallen in love with under one arm. "Just don't drop it on your foot."
"I won't!" he wheezed, managing another six inches before his arms gave out and he had to lean against the chair, panting.
Hestia had already moved on from the couch placement and was now fully in command mode, darting from room to room with the energy of a hummingbird on espresso. She pointed, directed, redirected, and occasionally physically shoved me by the hip when I set something down two inches from where she wanted it.
"The bookshelf goes against that wall, Blake. No, the other wall. The one with the good light."
"The rug needs to be centered under the table. Centered! That's off by a hand's width, I can see it!"
"The chairs need to face the hearth, not the window. I want everyone looking at the fire when we eat together."
I moved a nightstand upstairs, carried it back down when she changed her mind, carried it back up when she changed it again, and set it down in the exact spot she had originally chosen. She nodded with deep satisfaction, completely unaware of the loop.
Bell, to his credit, never stopped trying. He managed to drag two chairs into the dining area, carry a basket of kitchen supplies up to the counter, and even helped me wrestle the bed frame up the narrow staircase, though his contribution was mostly moral support and the occasional grunt of effort while I did the actual lifting.
Every time he completed a task, he looked at Hestia with those bright red eyes, silently seeking approval.
And every time, she gave it. A smile, a nod, a gentle "good job, Bell." The kid practically floated after each one.
It took us a little over two hours to get everything unpacked, unsealed, and arranged to Hestia's exacting specifications. By the end, the house looked like an actual home.
It all needed to be absolutely perfect, because in Hestia's eyes, this was not just a house anymore. This was our home. Her first real home since descending from Heaven, and she was going to make sure every single detail reflected that.
Hestia stood in the center of the living room and slowly turned in a full circle. Her lower lip trembled just slightly. "It's perfect," she whispered.
Bell wiped sweat from his forehead with his sleeve and beamed. "It really is, Lady Hestia."
There was a knock at the front door.
Hestia looked at me. "We have company?"
I looked at the door, then shrugged and walked over to open it.
"Hey there, hero! We came over to play!" Tiona stood on my doorstep with both fists planted on her hips.
I blinked. Then blinked again, because I wanted to make sure I was actually seeing what I thought I was seeing.
The Loki Familia was outside my door.
Not all of them, thankfully. If Bete had been standing there, I probably would have shut the door and gone back to arranging throw pillows.
But the group assembled on our front step was significantly more pleasant.
Tiona was at the front, naturally, bouncing on the balls of her feet. Her sister Tione stood a half step behind with her arms crossed, looking mildly inconvenienced by the whole excursion but present nonetheless. Ais Wallenstein was there too, standing perfectly still with those golden eyes fixed on me like she was already calculating how to start another fight. And behind them all was Riveria who looked beautiful as always.
Of course she did, she was an elf after all. I think she might even be a High Elf. Which was something important in this world according to Hestia.
There was also a fifth woman I didn't recognize. She was slender, almost wiry, with mischievous red eyes that looked like they were constantly two seconds away from causing an international incident. Her red hair was pulled back in a loose ponytail, and she wore very short shorts that showed off her long legs, paired with a top that did absolutely nothing to suggest she took anything seriously. Her grin was lopsided, cocky, and aimed directly past me into the house like she already owned the place.
Riveria sighed and placed a hand on Tiona's shoulder, gently but firmly pulling her back a step. "We are not here to play, Tiona," she corrected. "We are here to congratulate the Hestia Familia on their new home."
"Pfft." The red-haired woman waved a dismissive hand. "I'm just here to tease the busty shortstack."
I studied her for a second. She had divinity. It rolled off her in lazy, unpredictable waves, unmistakable once you knew what to feel for. But where Hestia's divine presence felt like warmth and hearth fire, like a blanket pulled tight on a cold night, this woman's aura was... slippery. Shifting.
It felt like pure chaos crammed into a lean body and topped with a shit-eating grin.
I was about ninety-nine percent sure this was Loki.
Before I could say a word, the redhead pushed straight past me through the doorway like I was a piece of furniture and locked eyes with Hestia across the living room.
"Ugh," Hestia groaned, her twin tails practically bristling behind her. "My new house is going to stink now."
Loki recoiled, pressing a hand to her small chest in exaggerated offense. "What?! What's that supposed to mean, you little gremlin?"
"Isn't it obvious?" Hestia crossed her arms beneath her chest, which pushed her already impressive bust upward in a way that was definitely intentional. "I'm talking about you stinking up the place, Loki. We just moved in. The floors are clean. The air is fresh. And now it's going to smell like bad decisions and cheap booze!"
Loki's eye twitched. "Oh yeah? Well at least I'm not a chibi like you."
Hestia puffed up like an angry cat, her cheeks flushing red. "I am not short! I am fun-sized, and Blake thinks I'm perfect just the way I am!" She gestured at me with a sweeping arm.
Loki glanced at me, then back at Hestia, then at Hestia's chest, then at her own decidedly flatter profile, and her expression soured further. "Tch."
I decided this was not a war I needed to participate in.
I turned back to Riveria. "Riveria," I said, meeting her emerald eyes with a smile. "You light up the room anywhere you go."
Her gaze flicked to mine. One eyebrow rose by approximately two millimeters. Her expression did not change. She simply held my gaze with the calm, unimpressed patience of someone who had been alive long enough to have heard every compliment in every language and found all of them wanting.
Then she looked away and stepped past me into the house without a word.
Ah. So she had cooled down from her enthusiastic nerd-out over my magic two days ago in the Dungeon. Shame. I liked that version of her.
Behind me, I heard Bell's voice, quiet and reverent, like a student watching a master at work. "So cool," he whispered. "As expected of Big Bro Blake!"
Tione snorted loudly from the doorway. "Cool? That pickup line was like a four out of ten at best."
"Three," Tiona corrected cheerfully, holding up three fingers as she bounced inside. "Maybe a three and a half because he looked her in the eyes when he said it. Points for confidence!"
Ooof…
"The delivery was flat," Tione added, following her sister.
"I thought it was smooth…" Bell offered quietly.
I let out a breath and stepped aside, holding the door open as the remaining guests filed in. Ais walked past me at her usual measured pace, golden eyes sweeping the interior of the house with clinical assessment before settling back on me. She stared for a full three seconds, said absolutely nothing, and continued into the living room.
I was starting to suspect that was just how she communicated. I shut the door behind them all, turning to survey the chaos that my quiet morning of furniture arrangement had suddenly become.
Hestia and Loki were still going at it in the center of the living room, their faces inches apart, neither willing to yield a single centimeter of ground. Hestia's twin tails were practically standing on end. Loki was leaning down with a grin.
Bell stood to the side watching them with wide, nervous eyes, his head swiveling back and forth like he wasn't sure if he should intervene or hide behind the couch.
Tiona had already made herself at home on the same couch that I had spent twenty minutes positioning to Hestia's exact specifications, her ass was bouncing on the cushions as if to test their quality. Tione leaned against the wall beside her sister, watching the goddess argument with mild entertainment. Ais stood perfectly still near the dining table, staring at the hearth. And Riveria had settled herself into the chair nearest the window.
Our perfect home had been invaded by elves, amazons, a sword princess, and a chaos goddess who was currently calling my newest girlfriend a "walking milk jug."
Hestia's response involved language that no goddess of hearth and home should have known, and Bell covered his ears with both hands.
Does this count as a welcome to the neighborhood?
I dropped into one of the empty chairs, figuring I might as well get comfortable since it was becoming increasingly clear that the Loki Familia was not leaving anytime soon.
Hestia broke away from her staredown with Loki mid-insult, turned on her heel, and skipped across the room toward me.
Before I could even shift to make space, she planted herself directly on my lap, her soft weight settling against my thighs as she wiggled her hips once to get comfortable and then leaned back against my chest.
She crossed her legs primly, her scandalously short white dress riding up her thighs, and fixed Loki with the smuggest expression I had ever seen on a divine being.
It was a power move.
Loki's cocky grin actually faltered. "Wait." Loki held up one hand, her eyebrows climbing toward her hairline. "Wait, wait, wait. Are you... Hestia the Eternal Virgin... actually in a relationship? Like, a real one? With this guy?"
Hestia tilted her chin up. "Yes. I am."
The room went through several reactions simultaneously.
"Are virgin goddesses allowed to have sex?" Tiona blurted out.
Tione closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose. "Tiona. Read the room..."
"What? It's a valid question!"
Loki's red eyes were glinting. "No," she said simply. "They're not. That's kind of the whole point of being a virgin goddess, you airhead." She flicked her gaze between Hestia and me. "The moment Hestia goes all the way, she loses a chunk of her divinity. Permanently."
Hestia's cheeks flushed pink, but she didn't shrink back. She lifted her chin even higher and huffed. "Not that it's anyone's business," she said firmly, her fingers tightening over mine, "but Blake and I are perfectly happy even if we can't have normal sex."
Loki's entire face lit up like she had just been handed the greatest gift the mortal world had ever produced. "Damn, chibi," she said, her voice dripping with delighted malice. "Didn't know you were that kinky."
Ais tilted her head to one side. I was fairly certain the concept Loki was implying had sailed cleanly over her blonde head and kept going.
Riveria flushed bright red.
Bell looked like someone had set his entire head on fire.
"Nice," Tiona said with a shameless thumbs-up and a grin that matched Loki's in raw audacity.
Tione smacked the back of her sister's head hard enough to make a sound.
"Ow!"
I cleared my throat before this conversation could spiral any further into territory it didn't need to go into. I tightened my arms around Hestia's waist, pulling her a little closer against me, and redirected my attention to the group at large. "So," I said, keeping my voice casual and even. "Is this kind of housewarming visit normal between Familias?"
Loki flopped sideways onto the arm of the couch with the boneless ease of someone who made herself at home in every room she entered, regardless of whether she was invited. "Nope," she said cheerfully. "Not even a little bit. But you and my kids are friends now, so it's fine."
I raised an eyebrow. "Are we friends? We've only interacted twice. And those interactions were friendly-ish, but more on the weird side. I did enjoy Riveria's enthusiasm when she tried to pry all my magical secrets out of me, though."
Riveria's flush, which had been slowly fading, immediately returned at full intensity. "That is not what happened!"
"Don't sweat the details." Loki pointed a finger directly at Ais, who was still standing near the dining table in her characteristic stillness. "Can't you see how interested she is in you?"
Ais's golden eyes locked onto mine. "I want to fight him," she said.
Bell, still recovering from the earlier sex conversation, sputtered back to life. "I... I'm pretty sure that's the opposite of friends, Miss Ais! Friend's don't fight!"
Loki shook her head slowly, pressing a hand to her forehead. "We really need to teach this girl some proper tact."
Tiona barked out a laugh from the couch. "We've all tried! I spent an entire afternoon going through social scenarios with her once. Gave her a list of things normal people say when they meet someone new. 'Hello,' 'Nice to meet you,' 'How are you?' She memorized the whole list and then used 'Nice to meet you, let's fight' as a single sentence the next day."
Tione nodded wearily. "I tried bribery. Told her I'd buy her a new sword polish if she could go one full week without challenging a stranger to combat."
"How long did she last?" I asked.
"Four hours."
Riveria, still facing the window, let out a quiet sigh. "Ais is my most difficult student to date when it comes to teaching proper social interaction," she said. "I have tutored children, nobles, and adventurers with no formal education. I once taught a dwarf who had been raised by wolves how to hold a fork and that was easier despite the fact that he was mostly just muscles and growls."
Ais tilted her head to the other side. A tiny furrow appeared between her brows. "Does that mean we can fight now?"
"No," Loki said instantly.
Ais pouted.
I almost laughed.
Riveria caught the corner of my mouth twitching and gave me a warning look.
I returned my face to neutral.
Hestia shifted on my lap and glanced back at me suspiciously. "You are not fighting her in our front room."
Now I was pouting. "I wasn't going to!"
Her eyes narrowed. "Or the backyard…"
"I didn't say anything about the backyard."
"That means you thought about it."
"I think about a lot of things."
Loki pointed at me. "See? He and Ais will be great friends! Isn't this nice, we're all bonding!"
Hestia glared. "Do not bond with Loki! She's an evil slut!"
Loki snorted. "Alright, jokes aside," she said. "Where the fuck did you find this guy, Hestia?"
Hestia opened her mouth, but Loki kept going.
"Level Six adventurers don't come out of nowhere. They take years, sometimes decades, of grinding through the Dungeon, building excelia, pushing past limits that kill most people. The number of active Level Sixes in all of Orario I can count on one hand." She raised her fingers. "And now suddenly there's a new one nobody's ever heard of, walking around Orario in a Familia that was founded two days ago." She fixed me with a sharp stare. "Just his presence alone is going to shock every Familia in this city when the word gets out."
The room had gone quiet. Even Tiona had stopped bouncing on the couch.
Loki's gaze narrowed. "So. What country are you from?" She held up a finger before I could answer. "And don't lie. All gods and goddesses can sense lies."
Hestia stiffened slightly in my lap. I felt her fingers twitch over mine. She knew where I was actually from, and she also knew that "another dimension entirely" was not an answer that would go over smoothly.
Bell swallowed audibly.
Tiona's eyes lit up like this was a show.
Tione crossed her arms.
Riveria watched me with quiet intensity.
Ais simply waited.
I kept my expression relaxed and shrugged. "I was born in the country of Japan," I said. "Then I grew up in New York City, in the country of America." Every word was true.
Loki stared at me. "I said don't lie, wait..." She trailed off. Her brow furrowed. Her mouth opened, then closed. Then opened again. "That didn't register as a lie. How... what..." She shot upright off the couch arm, pointing at me with an accusatory finger. "How did you trick my senses like that?! Japan? America? Those aren't real countries! I've never heard of either of those places!"
Japan and America were very real countries. They just didn't happen to exist in this particular world. And apparently the divine lie-detection worked on a technicality basis.
Good to know.
Hestia pressed her lips together in my lap, fighting down a smile. She knew exactly what I was doing, and the tiny vibrations running through her body told me she was trying very, very hard not to laugh.
"Ohhh! That was so cool!" Tiona rushed forward, planting her hands on the armrest and leaning toward me with a manic grin. "Teach me how to do that! Teach me how to LIE to a goddess! Do you know how useful that would be? I could tell Loki I didn't eat her leftovers and she'd never know!"
"You DID eat my leftovers?!" Loki shrieked. "And I obviously knew you were lying!"
"Yeah, but if he teaches me then when I do it in the future you won't!"
"Nani!? You're going to keep doing it!? Sniffle… All of my children like to bully me…" Loki said with fake tears in her eyes.
And did she just say 'sniffle' out loud…?
Tione grabbed her sister by the back of her collar and hauled her backward. "Do not," Tione said, looking me dead in the eyes with an expression of absolute seriousness, "teach my sister how to do that. She gets into enough trouble as it is. I am begging you."
Tiona squirmed in her sister's grip, still grinning. "Come on, Tione! Think of the possibilities!"
"I am thinking of the possibilities. That's exactly why I'm saying no!"
"So this is how gods and high-level adventurers act," Bell murmured, his red eyes darting between Loki sprawled on the couch arm, Tiona being physically restrained by her sister, Ais pouting by the dining table, and Hestia sitting on my lap like a queen on her throne. "It's all so... normal."
I snorted and reached up to pat Hestia on the head. Her eyes closed halfway as my fingers combed through her silky black hair near the base of her twin tails. She made happy Hestia noises.
"Bell," I said, still scratching lightly behind Hestia's ear in a way that made her practically melt against my chest. "Just because someone has a lot of power doesn't make them suddenly any less weird. Trust me on that. Everyone is a little bit weird."
"Mmhm," Hestia agreed dreamily, tilting her head to give my fingers better access.
Riveria let out a quiet but pointed snort. "You are calling us weird," she said. "You. The man who was using spells in the Dungeon without any incantation whatsoever. And where exactly did your wings come from? You manifested eight of them from thin air. That is not any form of magic documented in Orario's recorded history."
"I'm half-human," I said. "And half of a race called fallen angels. We all have black wings."
Loki's mouth twisted into a frustrated pout. "You're telling the truth again," she groaned, dragging both hands down her face. "Fallen angels. Fallen. Angels. I have never heard of fallen angels. I've been alive since before humans figured out how to make fire, and I have never once encountered or even heard a rumor of a race called fallen angels." She pointed at me accusingly. "Who are you?!"
"Blake Himejima," I said pleasantly. "We covered that."
Loki looked like she wanted to bite something.
Hestia, who had been luxuriating in my head pats, cracked one blue eye open and fixed Loki with another devastatingly smug look. The kind of look that said, very clearly, I know something you don't, and I'm going to enjoy watching it eat you alive.
Then she shifted her gaze to Riveria.
"So," my goddess said, her voice dripping with honeyed sweetness as she turned her full attention to the elven mage. "You're the elf trying to seduce my Blake, huh..?"
Riveria's composure shattered. "I am doing no such thing!" she sputtered. A vivid flush blazed across her cheekbones and raced to the tips of her pointed ears, turning them pink. "There is absolutely nothing romantic or seductive going on between us! We've only had a few conversations!"
"Hehe! She's blushing again!" Tiona declared from across the room, pointing with unrestrained glee.
"I am not blushing. This is a natural physiological response to being falsely accused of something so—perverse!"
"That's what blushing is, Riveria," Tione said flatly.
Ais nodded once. "Riveria's cheeks have been that color more and more the past few days," she observed calmly. "Since we first met Blake in the Dungeon."
Riveria looked like she wanted the floor to open up and swallow her directly into the deepest level of the Dungeon.
Then Ais turned to face the rest of the room, and something shifted in her golden eyes. "I'm not dumb," she said quietly. "Or an airhead."
The room went still.
"I just..." She paused, and for the first time since I had met her, Ais Wallenstein looked genuinely uncomfortable. In a deeply human way. "I don't have a lot of practice talking to people. I know I say things wrong. I know I make it weird when I ask to fight someone." She looked down at her hands. "I don't try to make people uncomfortable…"
Tiona's grin faded. Tione's arms uncrossed. Even Loki's playful expression softened into something quieter.
A knot of guilt twisted in my stomach. I had been reading her as a one-note battle junkie, a cute blonde wrecking ball with zero social awareness. But that wasn't what she was at all.
"Ais," I said, and she looked up. I held her golden gaze and let the sincerity settle into my voice. "I'm sorry. I think I've been reading you wrong, and that's on me, not you."
Her eyes widened slightly.
"And I would love to fight you again," I continued, offering her a genuine smile. "Anytime you want. Just give me a heads-up so I can stretch first… You are really fast…"
Ais's golden eyes lit up like someone had flipped a switch behind them. "Okay," she said softly. "Thank you, Blake."
Tiona sniffled loudly. "That was beautiful… And he's right, we are all fucking weirdos aren't we?"
"Shut up, Tiona!" Tione muttered, though her own eyes were suspiciously moist as well.
Damn, who ordered the feels?
Riveria had used the Ais moment to rebuild her composure, but I could still see the faintest traces of pink lingering on her ears.
"Riveria," I said, and she met my gaze with guarded caution. "I wouldn't mind teaching you some of my magic. If you'd be willing to do the same for me."
Her eyebrows rose.
"I don't know a lot, honestly," I admitted. "Mostly a few jutsu and basic storage magic. Nothing that would impress a mage of your caliber." I said those last two words casually, as an honest assessment of my abilities. My personal inventory space was about the size of a small closet, which Akeno had told me was embarrassingly mediocre.
The reaction I got was not what I expected.
"Storage magic?!" Loki practically shrieked. "You can use storage magic?! That's one of the rarest and most useful abilities in the entire Dungeon! Adventurers spend their entire careers praying for a storage skill and most never get one! It's not something that can just be taught!"
I blinked. "Really?"
"Yes, really!" Loki looked like she was torn between strangling me and hugging me. "Storage skills are so valuable that Familias with even one member who has a small inventory bag are considered elite logistics units! Some Familias rent out their storage-skill members to other Familias for Dungeon expeditions at insane rates!"
I scratched my cheek, genuinely confused. Was the magic system of this world really that limited? "My older sister Akeno was the one who taught me," I said slowly. "I'm honestly not that good at it. My personal inventory space is only about the size of a small closet."
Loki made a sound like she had been punched in the stomach. She staggered back a step, caught herself on the couch, and stared at me. "A small closet," she repeated in a strangled whisper. "Most adventurers lucky enough to get a storage skill only have inventories the size of small backpacks. Some only get the equivalent of a belt pouch. And you're sitting there on that chair with a goddess on your lap telling me you can teach magic that's even better than what most people are blessed with as skills?"
"I mean... yes?"
"Very well," she declared. "I have decided. In return for teaching my familia this magic, I will graciously allow you to marry my beautiful, sexy, stoic green-haired elf." She gestured magnanimously at Riveria. "But I still get to have her in my bed on weekends…"
"Pffft! WHAT!?" Riveria's face went through an entire color wheel in less than a second. Her fingers closed around her magic staff, and she launched it at Loki's head with perfect accuracy!
THONK!
The staff connected directly with the center of Loki's forehead. The crack of wood on divine skull echoed through the living room. Loki's head snapped back, her eyes crossed, and she crumpled to the floor, immediately curling into a ball and rolling back and forth while clutching her forehead with both hands.
"OW! OW OW OW! RIVERIA! THAT HURT! THAT REALLY HURT! I THINK YOU CRACKED MY SKULL! I'M DYING! SOMEONE CALL A HEALER! MY BEAUTIFUL FACE!"
"Oh please, you don't have a beautiful face, you have a scheming face, like a fox," Hestia said from my lap.
"YOU STAY OUT OF THIS, CHIBI!"
"IT'S MY HOUSE! I CAN SAY WHAT I WANT!"
Riveria stared down at Loki with the cold, absolute promise of further violence if even one more word left the goddess's mouth. Riveria then let out a long, controlled breath through her nose. She smoothed her green hair back into place, straightened her posture, and addressed the room.
"Tiona. Tione. We are leaving. Now." Her voice brooked no argument. "Since Finn isn't here, I'm in charge, and I am exercising that authority to end this visit before anything else happens that I will need to forget." She did not look at me when she said that. She very deliberately did not look at me.
"Awww," Tiona whined, her shoulders slumping dramatically as she peeled herself off the floor where she had collapsed during her laughing fit. "But I wanted to get to know the hero more! We barely even talked! I had questions!" She ticked them off on her fingers. "Where's Japan? What's a fallen angel eat for breakfast? Can I touch his wings? How many push-ups can he do? Is he single? Not for me, for Riveria. Maybe also for me."
"Tiona," Riveria warned.
"Fine, fine. I guess I can wait until next time." Tiona pouted but shuffled toward the door with exaggerated reluctance, dragging her feet across the wooden floor.
Tione bent down and scooped Loki off the ground with one arm, tucking the groaning goddess under her elbow like an oversized, complaining sack of potatoes. Loki dangled there limply, still clutching the angry red welt rising on her forehead.
Tione paused at the doorway and glanced back at me over her shoulder. Her eyes swept over me with a slow, measuring intensity that was distinctly different from her sister's bubbly curiosity.
"I'll see you in the Dungeon," she said. A dangerous smirk curled the corner of her mouth. "Maybe we'll talk more. If you're more impressive than Captain Finn."
Tiona's pout deepened at her sister's tone, and she elbowed Tione in the ribs as they walked out together. "You already have a crush on Finn, you can't switch to Blake, I saw him first!"
Their bickering faded as the group filed out. Riveria was the last through the door. She did not say goodbye.
The door clicked shut behind them.
Bell sagged against the nearest wall. He pressed a hand to his chest like he was checking that his heart was still beating. "That was so scary," he said weakly. "Those girls were all famous adventurers. Like, really famous. And they were just... standing in our living room. Arguing. And throwing things."
"Welcome to my life, Bell," I said.
Hestia hopped off my lap with a decisive bounce. She smoothed down her white dress and surveyed the living room.
"I need to open all the windows," she announced firmly. "The Loki stink needs to air out before it seeps into the upholstery." She marched to the nearest window and threw it open with more force than was strictly necessary, letting the cool Orario breeze rush in.
"Do you need some help?" Ais Wallenstein asked Hestia.
"That would be nice, Ais..." Hestia trailed off. "Wait!? What are you still doing here? Your Familia just left!"
I blinked at Ais as well.
Ais tilted her head again. She seemed to like doing that a lot. "Blake said we could spar," she explained, as if this were the most obvious thing in the world. "So I stayed behind."
There was a beat of silence.
"Can I watch?" Bell blurted out, his earlier fatigue completely forgotten. In fact, his red eyes were practically sparkling. "Watching Big Bro Blake fight the Sword Princess would be the coolest thing ever! I could learn so much!"
Ais turned her gaze to Bell. She studied him for a moment, then nodded. "I don't mind," she said simply.
I shrugged. "That's fine by me."
According to Ais, there were empty training plots scattered throughout the city, designated areas where high-level adventurers were permitted to spar without risking property damage or civilian injuries. The Guild maintained them specifically because the alternative was Level Fours, Fives and Sixes demolishing residential blocks every time they wanted to blow off steam. She knew the location of three within walking distance and offered to lead us there whenever we were ready.
Hestia stepped into the center of the room before anyone could reach for the door. "No one," she said firmly, crossing her arms beneath her chest in a way that pushed her already impressive bust upward, "is going anywhere just yet!"
She looked at me. Then at Bell. Then at Ais, who tilted her head again.
"We all just set up our new home properly," Hestia continued. "Together. As a Familia. And I am going to make everyone lunch before anyone goes off to stab each other." A warm, proud smile spread across her face, and her voice softened. "This will be our first meal in our new home. Our first Familia meal. And it's going to be special!"
I smiled at Hestia. "Sounds perfect, my goddess."
She blushed, huffed, and turned toward the kitchen with her twin tails swaying behind her. "I told you to use my name!"
"I know."
Bell practically vibrated with excitement and rushed after her, volunteering to wash vegetables, set the table, carry plates, and anything else she needed. Ais drifted toward the kitchen behind them, drawn either by the promise of food or by genuine curiosity about how cooking worked.
Given what I had seen of her, it was entirely possible she had never used a kitchen in her life.
I hung back for a moment, watching the three of them settle into the space.
Hestia was already pulling ingredients from the shelves we had stocked that morning, her small hands moving with practiced ease as she organized everything on the counter. She glanced at Ais, who was standing too close to the stove with the blank expression of someone who had never been introduced to the concept of cooking, and gently repositioned the blonde swordswoman to a safer distance before handing her a knife and a cutting board.
"Here," Hestia said patiently. "Have you ever chopped vegetables before?"
Ais looked at the knife. Then at the potato on the cutting board. Then back at the knife. "I can cut things," she offered.
"I'm sure you can, sweetheart, but this is a kitchen knife, not a sword, and I'd like to keep the cutting board in one piece…"
Bell was already washing his hands at the basin waiting for his goddess's instructions like a devoted apprentice.
I leaned against the kitchen doorframe with my arms crossed and let the scene soak in. It felt like home.
Then someone knocked on the front door.
I pushed off the doorframe and headed back through the living room, figuring Riveria had finally noticed her party was one swordswoman short and sent someone back to collect the stray.
I pulled the door open, and started talking before I even registered who was standing there. "Did you guys forget something—"
It wasn't the Loki Familia.
Hyakinthos Clio stood on my doorstep. The Apollo Familia's captain, the Level Three who had practically pissed himself that morning when I told him my level.
The fuck does this guy want now?
He was scowling at me for some reason. He thrust an accusatory finger directly at my face, close enough that I could have bitten it off.
"You!" he snarled. "YOU DAMN LIAR! YOU THINK YOU CAN TRICK ME?!"
What? I stared at him.
"I went to my god Apollo himself," Hyakinthos continued, his voice rising with every word, "and he told me the truth! Hestia only descended a few months ago! There is no way, no possible way, that she has a Level Six working under her!" His face was turning red, with veins standing out on his neck. "You injured a member of our noble Familia and tricked me into retreating, sullying my honor and the honor of Lord Apollo!" He drew himself up to his full height. "Therefore, the Apollo Familia officially challenges the Hestia Familia to a War Game!" he declared, his voice ringing with haughty finality, like he had just dropped an ultimatum that would shake the foundations of Orario.
He stood there, finger still extended, chest puffed out, waiting for my reaction.
"...Okay?" I said flatly.
His mouth was still open from his declaration. It stayed open, but nothing came out. He blinked. "Wait? What? Really?"
I shut the door in his face.
I turned and walked back through the living room toward the kitchen.
Hestia was standing on a small step stool at the stove, stirring a pot with one hand while gesturing instructions with the other. Ais stood beside her at the counter, her golden eyes narrowed in fierce concentration as she methodically reduced a potato to cubes with the careful cuts. Bell hovered between them, carrying plates to the table with quick, happy steps, occasionally sneaking glances at Ais with pink-tipped ears.
"Who was that?" Hestia asked without looking up from her pot.
"Just that loser from the Apollo Familia," I said with a shrug, settling into a chair at the table. "He was whining about honor and challenged us to something called a War Game. No big deal… "
"Oh, okay then." Hestia smiled and adjusted the heat under the pot, tasting a spoonful of broth and humming her approval. She added a pinch of seasoning, stirred twice, and reached for the cutting board where Ais was still dissecting potatoes with surgical focus.
Then she stopped.
The words I had just said caught up to her brain.
Hestia turned to face me with the slow, mechanical rotation of a woman whose soul had just left her body and was trying to find its way back.
"EHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH?!"
XXX