After confirming that J's nature hadn't changed despite everything he had gone through over the years, Notch understood that there was no need to question J about many things anymore. He knew J well enough to accurately guess what he was thinking.
So he was certain that even if he chose to shield J, J would never accept it.
Likewise, J knew Notch just as well. He understood that Notch would never choose to cover for him.
That was why Notch was sure that the moment J chose to indulge D, he had already decided how he would atone in the future.
Hearing this, J seemed to have been struck right on the mark. He froze for a moment, then suddenly opened his eyes wide.
At first, his gaze was still a little dazed and unfocused, as if he hadn't fully recovered from the shock.
But as time passed, his eyes gradually cleared, and the confusion and haze were replaced with relief.
J took a deep breath, slowly regulating it, calming himself bit by bit. After a while, he looked at Notch again and said, "I've imagined countless times what it would be like to face you…"
His voice was low, tinged with a faint bitterness. "But the three things you just said… they never once appeared in any of those countless scenarios…"
As he spoke, J lifted his head, his gaze settling firmly on Notch. At that moment, beyond relief, there was also a trace of joy and emotion in his eyes.
It was as if he saw something in Notch that he had once been deeply familiar with... something that made him feel warm and at ease.
"Ten years…" J let out a soft sigh. "Ten years can change a lot…"
"These ten years trapped in the void turned me into someone who could sacrifice others' lives for the sake of freedom…"
He paused briefly before continuing, "I thought you would have changed too."
"I thought that once you learned the truth, you might choose to cover for me… or cut ties with me completely…"
His voice grew softer, "Because in my eyes, so many years should have been enough to change you…"
J shook his head, a helpless smile on his face as he went on, "I didn't expect… that neither of us had changed…"
There was a sense of surprise and relief in his voice.
It seemed he hadn't expected that despite the passage of time and all the changes in the world, something between him and Notch had remained exactly the same.
"I didn't expect… we could go back to the past…" J said softly, as if speaking to himself, yet also to Notch.
At that point, his whole body relaxed, as if the tension he had carried for so long had finally been released.
The corners of his lips lifted into a gentle curve... a genuine smile from the heart. It had been a long time since he had smiled like that.
J looked at Notch again. Although Notch's appearance was completely different from before, in that instant, J seemed to see the boy from the past... the one who had stepped in front of him without hesitation to protect him when he was being bullied.
He was still the same as before, with steady eyes and a warm smile.
Like a beam of light breaking through the gloom, always appearing when J needed it most, bringing warmth and salvation.
With that thought, J's gaze gradually turned resolute. He looked at Notch again and said, "The atonement plan I came up with probably won't be needed anymore."
"But… I know that before talking to me, you had already arranged how to deal with me."
At this, J extended both hands, clenched into fists, and held them out toward Notch without hesitation. "Do as you see fit."
J's reliance on Notch was much like the way Entity 303's group relied on Xu Yuan... a kind of unconditional trust and dependence.
As long as Notch was there, J could completely empty his mind. Everything would be arranged by Notch; he only needed to follow.
Seeing J looking like he was ready to be arrested, Notch rolled his eyes, caught between laughter and exasperation.
With a sharp "smack," Notch unceremoniously slapped J's outstretched hands aside and scolded with a grin, "You're at least an accomplice. Do you think a simple stint in jail would settle this? Dream on!"
"But you're not wrong... I have already arranged how to deal with you."
Seeing Notch drop the joking tone and turn serious, J nodded and said solemnly, "Go ahead. I can accept whatever punishment it is."
Notch replied bluntly, "You'll be the executioner."
Those words shocked J. He stared at Notch in disbelief, about to speak, but Notch cut him off, "I have no intention of killing him... and I can't kill him anyway."
"From the moment you gave up your physical bodies and merged into this world, you became immortal."
Notch's voice echoed in the air, each word striking heavily against J's heart.
"Immortal…" J murmured, repeating the word. A trace of sorrow gradually surfaced in his eyes.
For most people, immortality might be something to yearn for. But to J, it felt like a curse.
He couldn't help but think of D. Perhaps D would be happy to hear those words, but for J, immortality meant he would live alone in this world forever.
He couldn't imagine what it would feel like when his friends and family passed away one by one, leaving him behind.
The pain of parting from loved ones would surely make him fear forming any relationships at all.
From then on, he would likely never make friends again, nor want to grow close to anyone.
Because he knew clearly that no matter how hard he tried, he would never be able to avoid witnessing others' deaths... never avoid parting from them.
Immortality would bring him endless loneliness, just like when he had been sealed in the void.
"Maybe… this is the price I have to pay…" J thought to himself.
Although he was shocked by the idea of "immortality," he accepted this curse quickly. In his heart, the crimes he had committed deserved such punishment.
It only took him a moment to steady himself. Looking back at Notch, he asked, "If he's immortal, then what can I do as an executioner?"
Hearing the question, Notch explained Xu Yuan's proposed punishment for D.
After finishing, Notch looked straight at J and said slowly, "You'll be the director, and he'll be the sole protagonist in every play you write."
"What you need to do is reenact on him everything he inflicted upon every living being he harmed."