"Narauko-kuuuuun~! Don't leave meeee~!"
Glaring down at the bawling man with abject disgust, I make an attempt to push his head away from me, but he holds tight like glue and I don't want to break his arms.
How is this guy an adult?
"You already made me wait so looong~," Kamo-Sensei continues, whining like the child that he is on the inside. "I'm going to turn to dust~!"
"Stop whining," I flick his face with a scowl that is entirely performative, "It wasn't that long."
"It was forever!"
"It wasn't even ten days," I instantly rebuke with a twitching brow. "You can wait a couple hours longer."
"I don't wannaaaa~!"
"Well that's just too bad!" I yell, finally starting to get a little bit annoyed, even if I'm also really happy. I'm unsure if the contradiction of my existence will ever fade. "Get off me! I'll be back in like two hours!"
"Two years!?!" He yells back at me in shock.
"Two hours!"
"What two years!"
"Hours!"
"I don't wanna wait two years!"
This annoying...
Glaring at him once more in disgust, I put on a voice that feels like it'd probably be how a divine messenger would sound. Very dramatic you see.
"There shall be a reckoning upon you, Kamo-Sensei."
"Scary~," Kamo-Sensei rolls his eyes, clearly not putting any respect on my very real threats. "Whatever shall I do?"
My answer to that is simple and spoken with the appropriate scorn in my eyes.
"Repent."
Kamo-Sensei mimes throwing up, as if truly disgusted merely by the thought of it. It's fitting, really. I'm not sure if Kamo-Sensei has ever felt anything akin to regret.
I love that about him.
Still though, I am the more stubborn one. So instead of continuing this farce any longer, I simply pull my shadow up and around my body and pull myself inside of it.
Instead of leaving right away though, I first climb out of Kamo-Sensei's shadow and kick him in the ass, quickly leaving again before he can retaliate.
Serves him right really.
Either way, I have business to attend to.
I fail to keep a straight face at that thought, because seriously, what 'business'? I'm just excited to see my best friend again, that's all.
Yet as I delve into my shadow once more, I can't help but be awed by the sight of it.
Everything is just so much clearer now. The world down here was already beautiful; countless pillars of darkness connecting the Human Realm to the Shadow Realm, or whatever it is that's down there. I'm pretty sure it isn't Yomi, but I'm also not that sure so sorry for lying I guess.
But I never really got to see much of this sight. The Void that exists everywhere the shadowed pillars do not always blocked my sight like a thick fog.
But now..?
I can see so much further. Clearer.
Countless pillars holding two realms apart under an unfathomable ocean of non-existence...
It's so beautiful.
These days, I can even look through the pillars, somewhat. The shadows that connect to living beings are harder to look through for some reason, but I can at least get a vague understanding of where in the real world they are.
Space doesn't work normally down here, after all. A pillar right next to my own could connect to a shadow on the other side of the country while a pillar in the distance could be from right by my side.
But now it simply isn't a mystery where they are anymore. I can just look around, and I know where each shadow leads.
It's so fucking amazing!!
I can't even begin to describe it!! How I feel about this!
This is fucking MAGIC!!
I don't care how long I've lived in this world, I still remember my last. I still remember a lifetime of bland mundanity. Of a life without living.
Even if I could speak to my past self, would I be able to explain this? Would he understand it?
This beauty? This wonder? Could he even fathom the magic that I have at my fingertips?
I can fall inside of shadows. I do it so often that it's easy to treat it as something normal, but it isn't! It's fucking magic! I can teleport! And walk on the sky! And punch through mountains!
My body floats freely within my shadow, spinning without gravity as I lose myself in exuberance. In wonder.
I've been doing a lot of thinking over the past week and change, and now that I feel that everything is sorted in my head again...
"I just... I love this all," I whisper to the void, joyous tears falling freely from my eyes. "This is the one part of me that you will never understand, Sukuna... I'm glad though. I'm glad that you never had to see that world. You would have hated it even more than me."
Suddenly sporting a grin, I quickly wipe my face clean and focus on the wonderous sight around me. Talking about him has made me impatient to see him again, and I'd really rather speak to him directly than just to myself.
It only takes me a second to find Sukuna's shadow. It doesn't really matter where it is; his shadow is as easy to locate as my own.
It takes me only a moment to twist a tendril of my shadow out into the Void and connect it to Sukuna's. Distance is immaterial here in the end.
Normally, I'd look for a shadow next to him to jump out of, but I'm not trying to make him jump here, and doing it like this ensures that he will know I'm coming.
After all, for once I don't want to start a fight. Even after both of us having time to cool down, I'm not sure if we'd be able to stop escalating into a proper fight.
I want to spend some more time with him before that happens.
Those familiar bittersweet emotions are quickly pushed aside—not because I do not want to feel them, but because I know they will taste oh so much stronger when felt in a different time—as I focus instead on swimming through my shadow and back out into the world.
Sukuna is already facing me as I emerge on some forested mountain. Unsurprising, what with how my Cursed Energy is about as conspicuous as his own is right now.
Now, I was fully intending to burst out of the floor with my arms wide open, yelling "Suku-chwaaaan~!" And making kissy faces.
I don't, though.
I don't... I don't really say anything.
It's a little embarrassing, to be honest, but the moment I jumped out of his shadow, I realised something obvious in hindsight that I somehow didn't think about before now.
...He's changed too.
Just as much as I have. Changes both minute while remaining vast.
So I don't say a stupid greeting like usual or make a dumb face. Instead, when I meet his eyes I just sort of... freeze. Just a little.
I don't know how to describe it. I don't think I can. We've both been changed by black sparks, but the changes are so difficult to describe. So subtle.
It's like... It feels like...
A snort from Sukuna distracts me from my thoughts, and I find my lips curving upwards in imitation of his own as a huff of laughter leaves me as well.
With a growing smile of his own, Sukuna tilts his head to look down on me and says only two words, "You fuck—pfft," before the dam breaks and he bursts out in raucous laughter, unable to hold it back any longer.
Naturally, I match him; laughing my ass off so badly that I have to lean against a tree to keep from falling over, and then I look over and see Sukuna doing the same with a different tree, which only causes me to burst out into renewed laughter when our eyes meet again.
It's stupid. Not that funny. But it's like in class when you're trying not to laugh with your friends and it just makes everything so much funnier.
I'm so happy.
I feel light, as if this shared laughter is buoying me higher. Or maybe I'm just running out of air and getting high from it, who knows~?
"I—It's y—you fault!" I yell with an accusing finger that cannot stay straight as I shake with laughter, "Hahaha~! Your fault!"
Sukuna swings an arm forward, but his own laughter causes him to miss entirely, decapitating the tree behind me and just making me laugh even more. "Hahahahahaha~! Missed~! Hahaha~!"
"My fault?" Sukuna returns, acting offended but laughing all the same. "Hahaha! You hypocrite! You started it! Hahaha!"
"Me!?!" My voice pitches very high in disbelief at this—this slander. "Hahaha! That is just blatantly false information!"
"As if it is!" He immediately bites back, with some unexpected heat.
"You tried to kill me!" I defend, recalling the day we met fondly. That's what we're talking about after all. He's the one that started it by trying to kill me in the first place!
"Only because you—!" He stops.
My smile fades somewhat at the abrupt switch as Sukuna looks away for a moment to glare at nothing. I wait, unsure. I've never seen Sukuna hesitate, after all.
"You started it." He says again, slower this time. Softer. His eyes return to my own and I find myself taken aback by the... I hesitate to call it vulnerability. Something close to that.
"By being the first living creature to meet my eyes without any hatred."
To that, I have no counter.
"...My bad." The apology is sincere, no matter the snickering laugh that follows not long after, and when Sukuna glares at me and I do not apologise for laughing, he only joins me once more. Even if the laughter isn't quite so boisterous this time.
It's just funny. Even if I doubt anyone else would understand why. Even if I know we just look like two dumbasses laughing at nothing and blaming one another for it.
But we both saw the same thing the moment I got here.
I saw it in his eyes.
He must have seen it in my Cursed Energy. We both know I could have had it suppressed like normal by now.
Corruption.
That's what's so funny; what we both noticed. That change that no one but us will likely ever truly understand.
We have both already corrupted each other.
We may not have realised it back then—I certainly didn't—but we have been Cursing one another since the day we met.
Now here we are;
A man who wants to Love harbouring a seed of Hate.
A man who wants to Hate harbouring a seed of Love.
It's only a seed, as it is now. I don't Hate anything, obviously.
But... I'm not exactly happy with him either. He killed Suzaku. I liked Suzaku.
We may not have been close, but we could have been. She had such an interesting story I wanted to unfold; such an interesting life she could have lived. And it's all gone for what?
I don't Love Sukuna any less for what he did, but I'm certainly not happy. Like how you don't disown a cat after it shatters a glass off a counter, even if you liked that glass. Maybe not the best analogy, but whatever.
So I don't Hate, but at the same time, my Cursed Energy is still so blatant. I'd mostly been ignoring why I haven't made myself inconspicuous again, but now that it's a point of focus I can't just pretend otherwise.
It's a form of protest, I suppose. I'm expressing myself so clearly that no one will be able to mistake who I am or what I want; nor will they be able to mistake that I am stronger than them.
Like this, no one will want to go against my whim, just like how everyone freezes up whenever Sukuna is around. Only, with me they will behave.
So often, people have started fights around me or said needlessly hurtful things.
Now? Now they simply will not.
I feel a little bit bad about it. It isn't really me to impose myself on others like this.
It's Sukuna's fault.
That's why we laughed; because it's funny. We were both so resistant to accept one another's Curse and yet neither of us noticed how we were influencing each other, like a festering wound only visible when it can no longer be easily removed.
My influence on Sukuna is much the same. Perhaps more subtle.
The change that I saw in his eyes is that he was looking at me. Not just in my direction, but at me. He was waiting for me. He was thinking about me. Not for his own sake, but for mine.
So just as I do not truly Hate, he does not truly Love. But... there is a touch of consideration there now. Of care.
It's funny; I've thought of us as Yin and Yang for a while, but I'm only now remembering that the most important part of that philosophy is not the contrast of black and white. Rather, the important bit is the drop of white within the black and the drop of black within the white. That's what makes the balance harmonious.
So it's fitting, if nothing else, that we be this way.
"I feel like the wording of our bet was deeper than I realised," I comment mildly, causing Sukuna to huff ruefully and shake his head. A wistful chuckle of my own leaves me as I look out at the horizon. "I really had no idea how much 'everything' could cover. I just wanted your life, you know? To travel the world with you by my side."
But it's not that shallow. 'Winner takes all' seemed so simple to say. But this has become a bet of philosophy now. A fight to decide which Curse will bloom and which will be exorcised.
"I'd have rathered you just kill me," Sukuna replies with a shrug and slight smirk; as if I can't note the tense he used.
"Nah," I counter with a grin. "Once you see that I'm right, you'll just want to see how far you can get with a better Curse."
He scoffs, naturally. How else would I respond to that?
"What are you thinking now?" Sukuna asks, his tone an exasperated sort of annoyance.
I just shake my head and smile. "Nothin', just a little joke." Turning my head to look around us, I figure that that line of conversation is over and move on. "What're you doin'?"
"Some Yōkai ate a mountain Curse," he answers with a shrug directed to the very mountain around us. "Turned into some kind of Special Grade hybrid. It wasn't bad, but it was already falling apart when I arrived so," he shrugs and I nod in understanding.
"Nothing else?" I ask as I turn away from the mountain and conspicuously eye the enormous crater smoking in the distance.
Sukuna moves to stand by my side as I observe the crater, and he hums as if really thinking about it.
"Nope. Nothing else."
"You lie to me as easy as breathing," I complain with a pout.
"Impressive, right?"
"Haha! Asshole~."
I can't really complain though, and he knows it.
I'm not going to tell him about my Open Domain, after all. I'm sure he'll get some hints of it over time, like I have with whatever this was, but I'm not giving him the details.
Because in the end, I'll need it to kill him.
It's a double bluff too. My fighting style has always revolved around deception, even if I'm an awful liar. Tricks within tricks are where I shine.
That makes Open Domain really convenient for me. So long as he keeps trying to figure that out, he will never see Mahoraga coming.
I really can't wait, yet I also dread the day.
With Mahoraga now resting in my shadow, I've found myself even more confident of my victory.
But...
Well... It's still Sukuna. This confidence only feels like overconfidence. Maybe that's paranoia, and maybe I'm placing too high expectations on him but...
I can't wait to see how you respond.
"You really did hit a Black Flash too, didn't you?" Sukuna asks, which really does make me smile, because I can count on two hands the number of times he has actually been the one to initiate any kind of conversation with me.
"Yeah." A breathy sigh leaves upturned lips as I feel myself reliving the moment. "It was wonderful, was it not?"
Sukuna scoffs, and his answer is a lot simpler than mine.
"Pissed me off."
"Hah!" I can't help but laugh, because that is just such a... Sukuna thing to say.
"It was..." He continues, ignoring my reaction, and I make sure to listen. "Enlightening."
...Why do I feel like he put some respect on that word, I think to myself, eyeing him curiously. I wish I could ask you more.
I can't, though. Sukuna wouldn't tell me. I want to know how he felt about Suzaku. I want to know what brought him to the point of Black Flash. But I know he won't tell me.
Maybe he would if I pushed him, but... Well, I don't want to. So why should I?
"Oh yeah~?" I ask instead, leaning forward slightly so I can smirk up at him—since we're the same height, though I'm obviously wider. "What did you learn~?"
He raises an imperious brow at me and shakes his head at my antics, which really makes my brain stutter for a second. It's just weird.
He hasn't tried to cut my arms off once yet...
"The Soul of my Technique."
Those simple words are enough to snap my full attention straight back to him, and he smirks at the reaction. I, however, am immune to shame, so I simply stare at him with expectation instead, making him scoff in annoyance.
"You were right, somewhat. I found it. The highest peak of Sorcery"
"You actually did?!" I don't quite yell, but certainly raise my voice with excitement before turning and closing my eyes in concentration. "I can feel it stronger than before, but I still can't touch upon it. I told you you'd have better odds than me! What with your Technique being so laaam—"
I quickly tilt backwards as a gash opens up in the earth in the path that my neck was just in. The attack makes me smile wider.
There he is~.
Sukuna clicks his tongue, which is just really funny to me, so naturally I laugh. After all, he tried to get a reaction out of me with that reveal of his and failed, while I got a reaction out of him so easily~!
That's a point to me, baby~!
"What's it like?!" I quickly ask, feeling terribly Curious.
"Who knows~." He smirks again, and I can only pout. He's not going to tell me.
Let's call it an even score.
"Will you tell me," I try batting my eyelashes, "Pretty pretty pleeeease~?"
"No."
Tsk. Worth a shot.
"And you?" Sukuna asks. "What did you learn?"
"Hm? Moi?" I return, pointing both forefingers at my face as if confused.
"There are more humans I can kill," is his dry riposte, to which I can only say touché. Very in-character.
"The Heart of my Technique," I answer, smirking straight back at him. "Somewhat. It's pretty cool and awesome and definitely better than a Soul of a Technique, psh! Who needs such things! My Heart will surpass your Soul!" I righteously declare, hoisting a fist up into the air and staring forward and up nobly.
"...You're an idiot."
"You're still here."
A silence falls over us, but I can't bring myself to regret my words. I know it's a bold sort of thing to say to Sukuna, of all people.
But so what? He can't complain, it's his fault that I'm acting this way in the first place.
Damn asshole is making me inconsiderate.
"For now." Sukuna eventually replies, surprising me somewhat. "Enjoy it while it lasts."
That is definitely a threat on my life, but I just feel so happy to hear it.
Just one step closer to him admitting that we're bestest friends.
"Speaking of enjoying things," I begin, and Sukuna is immediately on guard from my tone. "You had some fun Cursing me, didn't you~?"
He stays silent, staring at me as if I'm a coiled snake and he's waiting for me to lunge at him.
"But if I had to guess," I continue, still smiling. "Your Curse on me doesn't feel quite complete yet, hm~? Like you've gone through all the steps but it's not all quite clicking together~?"
I can see it in his eyes that he knows what I'm talking about. I'm not surprised he doesn't understand it.
"Your point?"
"My point, is that if you are going to Curse me so cruelly, then the least you could do is do it properly." I take a moment to shake my head at him, mostly because I know the gesture will annoy him. "I get what you did. I understand it. But if you're going to twist my kindness like that, then you have to have some follow through."
"You 'saved' Tamamo," I do use air quotes and glare a little as I say that, "But you only did half the job. Your Curse on me isn't truly complete yet because you haven't followed through on it. My kindness isn't so shallow that I'd leave things at that, you know? So we're going to go visit Tamamo and make sure that she is well from everything that happened."
It serves two points to do this. Three, really, if I count the simple fact that I already want to see her.
Doing this will free Sukuna from this 'Ritual' he put himself in, which is a good excuse for him to actually go along with it. But beyond that, the part that he won't admit, is that this is an apology. From him to me.
He could never simply say 'I'm sorry' after all. But this? He can do this.
I think that some part of him realises that he went too far. That what he did was unfair to me. Or maybe my rose-tinted glasses are seeing things that aren't there.
Oh! That reminds me.
"Before that though!" I exclaim with a grin as I reach into my shadow inside my sleeve. "So much happened that I almost forgot, but I made you something when I was travelling to the capital."
As I say this, I pull out the black scarf I made him and hold it out.
He glances at it, seemingly unimpressed, and then his gaze rises to the white scarf wrapped around my neck as usual.
"You are such a fucking hypocrite," he says, exasperated, to which I can only laugh.
Still, he takes the scarf and swings it around his neck. I can't explain how happy that makes me.
It looks good him.
"Fine." An eyeroll follows the word. "Let's go."
Grinning just a bit wider, I walk up to a nearby tree and pull at my shadow until it covers the trunk like a portal. Idly twisting the depths of my shadow to branch out through the Void and into a different shadow nearly as familiar to me as Sukuna's.
"She probably hates you," I comment with a wink as I step into the shadow, "So maybe try to smile."
Sukuna immediately smiles back, and I just know he put all the bloodthirst he could behind that grin and I laugh at the banter.
Even you can be a dork. Kamo-Sensei wouldn't believe it.
///
A/N: He~llo! Dear readers!
Short chap today! I probably have thoughts and such about this chapter, but it's 1am and I'm so fuckin tired imma crash immediately after posting this :P
What I do have thoughts on now that I'm posting this is a quick response to some reactions I've seen to the previous chapter. Some people have brought up, I don't think 'concerns' is really the right word but that's the vibe kinda, some people have mentioned how they didn't quite like how narauko was acting so zesty and stuff, and I just think that's really funny, cuz not only is it basically just a repeat of all the comments I got back when I started this fic about how the mc is gay and I should have tagged that lmao.
But more than that, I'm just stroking my own ego a lil bit I ain't gonna lie, cuz how many of y'all complained about that early chapter where Narauko and Sukuna destroyed that villiage? How many of y'all told me that shit was out of character (for my character btw) or how Narauko's actions in that moment didn't make sense or that he can't be kind and do that. How many times did I say 'trust me'?
Cuz goddamn I'm good. I set up a goodie goodie character, then write him doing something horrible, then spend another 400k words writing him being a goodie goodie and how many of y'all forgot? Coming in from the last chapter and saying that Narauko's lil speech is wrong or stupid, as if you were not blinded by the exact shit he was talking about.
Sorry to rant, I'm not mad or anything, I just think it's honestly no sarcasm funny that the same people who complained about 'narauko can't be kind and selfishly kill people' will also complain about 'good guy narauko is actually incomparable to sukuna because he's such a goodie good guy'.
Like I know what I'm doin lol, you think I won't let set-up chapters simmer for a full real life year?
Just wanted to get that off my chest lol Feel free to ignore my schizophrenic ranting