That same morning.
The airport was swarming with reporters, all because of a single woman who had just set foot on Korean soil.
Master Seridwen Evelyn.
Today was the day she returned to Korea after a six-month dive overseas.
"Congratulations on your safe return!"
"What are your plans for your next mission, Ms. Seridwen!"
"Ah, I came here to rest. To rest."
Seridwen was a rare hunter, more famous than most heroes. After all, she was an SS-rank hunter of Korean nationality who had been granted the title of 'Master' by the World Hunter Association.
She was also a lovely black-haired beauty who had once graced the cover of the world's largest weekly, O-gok Magazine.
As a hunter tasked with traveling to all sorts of countries to rip terrifying monsters to shreds, her gaze carried an intimidating pressure that most people couldn't even meet.
The net worth of this black-haired, red-eyed beauty was estimated to be over two trillion won in old-world currency. She was, for all intents and purposes, a walking mid-sized corporation.
The Korean government had been accommodating her for the past four years to ensure she didn't leave, a period that coincided with when she had first entered the academy and awakened her Talent.
In any case, the hunter, beautifully dressed in a burgundy one-piece, showed no intention of even cracking a small smile for the camera lenses.
"How was the magical beast subjugation? You were spotted on satellite emerging from the last observed gravity wave in France."
"Same as always. Those who were meant to die, died. Those who were meant to live, lived."
"Kyaaa! Unni!"
There were even fans at the airport who had come just to see Seridwen.
Did they even hear what I just said?
Dealing with reporters and fans was exhausting for Evelyn.
It wasn't just because she was called by cringey nicknames like "The Red-Eyed Empress."
It was because she believed that trying to act cute for the public was something only half-assed heroes did.
In reality, however, everything she wore—from her beautiful clothes and earrings to her shoes—was sponsored.
With the high value that came with being an SS-rank hunter, she wasn't free from social responsibility.
"Shall we head to the hotel?"
After pushing through the fans with the help of a security barricade, Evelyn got into a waiting car.
She thought for a moment before speaking.
"Just drop me off in front of the academy."
"Understood."
Essol Academy was Evelyn's alma mater.
As soon as she became an SS-rank hunter, she was invited to be a visiting professor and would occasionally give lectures.
She even had her own office at the academy.
"That's a little better."
Knock, knock.
"Come in."
"Seonbaenim. I knew you'd be here. I just saw the news article about your arrival."
Dale Hardnet.
Her junior hunter spoke as if he had expected it.
"Let's go get some kimchi stew after I unpack my things."
"You're looking for kimchi as soon as you arrive?"
"Do you have any idea how much you miss kimchi when you're abroad?"
"I do. I'm an S-rank hunter now, too. But I can't today. I was called in for the assessments."
The scarecrow assessment might seem trivial, but it was a mandatory metric for evaluating students.
Because of that, there were plenty of attempts by students to cheat, which was why an S-rank or higher hunter was required to be present to prevent such dirty tricks.
As a former student council president, there was no way she didn't know that.
"…"
"There's nothing I can do, even if you glare at me like that."
"Is there anyone as useful as Isabella?"
"Well, I'm not sure. This is my first time, since I was just called in as a guest."
"You're working hard~."
Dale stared intently at his senior.
"Weren't you the one who had it much harder, Seonbaenim? Subjugating an S-rank magical beast in a foreign land."
"But I'm off the clock now."
"…"
"Have fun~."
"Don't wait for me. It'll probably be dark by the time it's over."
"I won't. I was just planning to see Isabella's face during lunch before I go."
"Yes, ma'am."
After Dale finished his business and left the room, an awkward silence hung in the air.
Should I go watch the scarecrow tests, too?
She considered it for a moment, then gave up on the idea.
As she decided to enjoy the long-awaited tranquility, she even felt inclined to sit at her desk.
A lot of time had passed, but the memories she'd made at the academy were still her precious treasures.
She still kept in touch with her colleagues from back then, though there had been a few rivals she couldn't stand.
To Evelyn, this place was her real 'home.'
There were no magical beasts or dungeons in Korea that could threaten her, so she could rest easy.
Just as she was about to take a pleasant nap…
—Personality Excretion Smash!!!
?
She felt like she'd heard an unfamiliar man's battle cry from somewhere.
WHACK!!
"Nnghok!?"
Evelyn's waist arched as if she'd been hit by an electric shock.
A tremendous impact.
Was it a physical blow? Before she even had time to consider it, her consciousness was completely stolen away.
She had never experienced anything like this before.
Even if her arm were severed right in front of her, even if her heart were being ripped out, she was cool-headed enough to respond.
But this single blow made her tremble.
Completely defenseless… I-I was hit…!
It took her 0.13 seconds to switch her mindset to a combat-ready state.
In that time, Evelyn had formulated nine different strategies, but the means of the enemy's attack remained unknown.
Evelyn's mind raced.
It can't be a magical beast. This is a villain. Did they use an ability to target me? Knowing that I would be coming to the academy?
[Searching for hostile entities within the entirety of Seoul.]
[Full scan complete in 2 seconds.]
[Search result: None.]
Impossible.
No enemies within a 605.2 km² radius? Could someone launch such a deadly attack with zero risk?
It was beyond imagination.
Just as she thought she was being targeted by the worst villain imaginable…
Personality Excretion One-Two.
"Nngh!? Nnghuk!"
Humiliatingly, the SS-rank hunter could do nothing but slam her forehead on the desk, clutch her stomach with her arms, and tremble.
The damage the enemy's attack inflicted was… similar to the urge to relieve oneself, the feeling of needing to empty her bowels.
A powerful enemy. To think they'd retaliate immediately just because I used my mana for detection…!
This was a clear warning…
It meant they wouldn't go easy on her if she tried to find their location!
It's definitely a villain!
And they're watching me right now!
In reality, Kim Sang-hyeok, the one who had inflicted this sense of impending excretion upon Evelyn, was just mindlessly hitting a scarecrow.
He had never intended to target Evelyn for even a moment.
In the original Onahole Academy, the protagonist could only attempt to conquer Evelyn in the latter half of the scenario.
Before that, there was an immense power gap, and the game was designed so that if you took the villain route, you couldn't even get near her.
However.
[Personality Excretion] had created an event that should never have existed in Onahole Academy.
A small mana scarecrow she had left behind during her time on the student council had become a conduit, channeling the 'Personality Excretion' attack.
This was a feature of Personality Excretion that even its user, Kim Sang-hyeok, was unaware of.
For example, what happens if you use Personality Excretion on an enemy's artifact that doesn't reveal the main body, like a summoned creature or a medium?
The Personality Excretion is "transmitted" to the main body.
If Kim Sang-hyeok had ever fought a summoner, he would have naturally discovered this fact.
But reality, instead of following any logical process, was now testing a woman's dignity through a hilarious event born from 70% chance and 30% depravity.
In other words, Evelyn felt like she was about to shit herself.
Shit out her own precious, noble personality.
But what in the world is this attack? This perverted villain… The sweat won't stop…
She had always been quite confident in her endurance, but as of today, that was canceled.
Evelyn was losing her mind, overwhelmed by a sensation she had never experienced before.
Nearly ten seconds had passed since the last blow, yet she couldn't even lift her butt off the chair.
This isn't a level I can just… endure!
The intuition of an SS-rank hunter was screaming at her.
This was not the kind of attack one could simply withstand and overcome.
The one in control was an opponent whose face she didn't even know.
A dizzying sensation, the feeling that she was about to discharge something fundamentally important that she must not give up as a human being, coursed up her spine with every passing moment.
"What do you want… Tell me!"
First, she had to see her opponent. The moment she thought that…
The '30-second interval' began.
Kim Sang-hyeok's first choice was a ruthless, inhuman attack, powered by the acceleration of his Asura Charge.
—Personality Excretion Dropkick!!!
"Oooohk!!"
Evelyn let out a low, animalistic gasp, at a complete loss.
I'm sure of it. This villain…! They're filled with malice toward humanity…
She couldn't expect even a shred of mercy.
Evelyn felt her spirit about to break before a villain whose face she didn't even know. It was a weak side of herself she couldn't have imagined until recently.
That was how terrifying this villain was.
The worst… To think I'd be taken down by an enemy like this… in the middle of the academy…
Her consciousness fading after the Personality Excretion Dropkick, she forced her eyes open again.
"No. Get a grip, Evelyn…"
She still couldn't figure out the villain's intentions, but if she broke here, who would be next?
The answer was all too obvious.
Isabella. Please notice… I have to escape first… This villain is… so ruthless it's hard to believe they're even human.
The words wouldn't come out.
As Evelyn barely clung to consciousness, the merciless barrage of Personality Excretion rained down on her during the 30-second interval.
Thwack, thwack, thwack, thwack…!!
"Nng! Nnghk! Hh, ah… Aht…!!"
Clenching her thighs tightly together, Evelyn let out short gasps, constantly resisting the feeling that she was about to excrete something.
Don't let your guard down…!!
She clenched her ass cheeks and endured.
Sweat poured down Evelyn's face like rain as she panted. It was proof that her body was instinctively using an enormous amount of energy to stop the Personality Excretion.
I don't know what's happening to my body… but I feel like I absolutely cannot allow it…
WHACK!!
"Hnnggghhh…♡"
The moment the 30-second interval ended, Evelyn blew out a hot breath through her nose.
After somehow enduring the insane urge to excrete, her entire body felt like it had been cooked hot from a full-sprint run, melting over the back of the chair.
Her breathing was ragged, but she couldn't calm down.
Without realizing it, she opened her thighs and her hand fumbled for the soft skin inside.
Her breasts had also become sensitive to an unprecedented degree. Just a slight brush against her nipple sent a wave of bliss through her mind.
Why do I feel like this…
The act of excretion itself certainly has a pleasurable component for humans.
Just as a man suffers from the desire to ejaculate and becomes a sage after releasing it, excretion signifies 'release.'
The closer she got to that 'release,' the longer she endured, the more her body yearned for it, becoming aroused.
Evelyn's body was heating up from resisting the excretion of her personality—in a way, the ultimate release.
She was getting desperate.
Even knowing that some heinous villain was watching her from somewhere, Evelyn was becoming shamefully drenched in sexual arousal.
Her eyes were defiantly raised, as if to say, "I haven't completely submitted yet," but she couldn't stop the hand that had begun to caress her.
"Kh, khht. Are you satisfied now? Why don't you… come out already…"
Fiddle, fiddle.
"Hahk… Hnngh… Dammit…"
I look like a completely defeated bitch.
Seridwen was so embarrassed her ears turned bright red. This was the first time she had ever experienced something like this…
Pushed to the brink of 'Personality Excretion,' every last root of her latent libido had been exposed, and she had become a bitch in heat, practically screaming 'free use' to anyone watching.
"Hahk… Hahk… Nngh… Hnngh…"
Evelyn felt dizzy as she reached a vaginal orgasm.
She didn't have the confidence to endure it if that came again at a moment like this.
It's okay. Recompose yourself and counterattack… There's no way they can use an attack of this magnitude so many times.
That must have been the last of it. It had to be.
Her eyes glazed over, drool trickling from her lips in a daze of defeat, as if her very human dignity was about to abandon her body.
"I… I won't lose… to something like this…!"
The 2-minute interval began.
[Breathless Personality Excretion] descended mercilessly upon the masturbating Evelyn.
"Nnghoooohhht!!?"
A storm of formless blows rained down on her.
Lying on the chair back as if it were a bed, legs spread, she was exposed to the Personality Excretion with a helpless expression on her face.
Thwackthwackthwackthwackthwack…!!
"Oh! Oooohk! Oh, oohk, no… I'm gonna… I'm gonna let it out… Oh, ohoh, I don't know what it is… but I'm letting it out… I'm letting it out… I'm letting it all out…"
Evelyn's eyes began to roll back.
She was in no state to care about the minimum dignity and decorum a human should possess.
Even excreting something the body absolutely had to get rid of, like feces or urine, required immense mental focus.
So what if the thing being excreted was her precious personality?
What if the lovely, black-haired, red-eyed lady's precious personality was being discharged through her asshole…?
"Oh, oooohh… ohooooh… let it out… let out the thing I'm not supposed to let out…"
Pffft, pffffffffft.
Pursing her lips into a small circle and exhaling hot breaths, Evelyn accepted her true defeat.
Spreading her legs on the chair, she excreted the 「Personality Jelly」.
It looked, quite literally, like jelly.
Though it was being discharged from her asshole, it didn't give off a dirty impression. The moisture on the jelly's surface was just a bit of sweat seeping from her flushed, pink asshole. It almost looked as if someone had been playing with a slime they'd stuck up their ass and it had just popped out.
But it wasn't a toy.
It was, without a doubt, her personality.
Huh?
Evelyn's personality—the Pink Jelly—spilled onto the floor and looked up.
There was her own body, legs wide open, asshole gaping, panting heavily.
Wh-what happened…? My body…? An out-of-body experience?
Boing. Boing.
She tried to jump, but she couldn't move in the direction she wanted.
The Pink Jelly was personality itself. It was different from the limbs we move so easily by sending electrical signals.
Even the battle-hardened Evelyn panicked at the sight of her own body.
In her uncontrollable Personality Jelly state, she bumped into things here and there before being flung outside.
[Personality Abrasion -1%]
Ouch, that hurts!!!
Just a slight scrape on the floor was so painful it brought tears to her eyes.
She was reminded anew of just how defenseless she was.
It hurts. It hurts… It really hurts so much.
No tears came out.
She had lost her body without even being able to put up a proper fight, and she herself had been spewed out like some kind of dreg.
Evelyn was tasting a truly terrible powerlessness.
My body… Give me back my body…
Had the room always been this cold?
The Pink Jelly, what was left of her personality, shivered.
I feel like I'm going to die… I've only been in this state for about 30 seconds and I feel like I'm going to die…
No, even if she wanted to die, could she?
Evelyn was thrown into the extreme powerlessness that only a victim of [Personality Excretion] could feel.
The [Personality Jelly] lacked the strength to endure even a normal environment.
To put it in perspective, her current state was like being thrown naked into the middle of the Arctic.
If left like this, it was only a matter of time before her personality collapsed. There was no need to even torment her.
Just then.
Evelyn's phone slipped out of her pocket and rolled across the floor.
That's it. I have to call for reinforcements!
Just to crawl two centimeters in the desired direction required thousands of trials and errors.
The distance to the smartphone was about 40 centimeters.
For the Pink Jelly Evelyn, it was a hellish journey.
But what was even more terrifying was not knowing what that heinous villain would do next.
Her colleagues and the juniors at her alma mater were in danger.
Enduring the pain of her personality abrading away, Evelyn pushed forward.
-x-X-x-
"Mmm~ This jeyuk is fucking delicious."
It was lunchtime, right after the scarecrow assessment.
The spicy stir-fried pork at the Essol Academy cafeteria was on another level!
Today, I also bought Hena's seafood pasta, paying her back for the money I borrowed yesterday.
After spending a total of 9 Coins, I was left with 45.
"You really didn't have to…"
"I'm just repaying the favor."
"A favor? …For my chest?"
Well, letting me touch her chest was a favor in its own right, but…
"…"
"If you're going to get that shy, you shouldn't have said it…"
"It's embarrassing…"
"I meant the favor of covering for me when I was about to be expelled."
The reason I could even enjoy this academy life was, in large part, thanks to Hena.
From her perspective, I was just some guy who would have disappeared if she'd just left me alone.
Was that also because of gaslighting?
"Why did you decide to defend me?"
"…"
"You don't have to say if you don't want to."
It wasn't a debt I could repay with a single meal, so I planned to do a little more for her.
I also felt like I needed to be by Hena's side.
But whether having me, the protagonist of an eroge, stick close to a girl with what the Goddess called a "fucking pervert body" was a plus or a minus, I still wasn't sure.
I couldn't help but worry that one of Ona-Aka's random erotic events (the ones designed to get you hard) was waiting for me.
"Can I sit here?"
Just then, Yuuna slid into the seat next to me.
"Aren't those your friends over there?"
They were staring at you with baffled expressions.
"I decided to eat with Hena today."
"Then why sit next to me?"
"…"
Her glare seemed to ask, Can't you just let it slide?
"Should I not sit here, then?"
"Please, have a seat, Your Highness. I offer this tribute to appease your anger."
I spooned some of my precious jeyuk onto her plate.
"Hmph. I have mapo tofu, is that okay?"
As if on cue, it was time to trade side dishes.
"I'm not a picky eater."
"I… can't eat spicy food…" Hena mumbled.
"Then how about some dumplings, Hena? Ah, just give me one without shrimp."
"Okay, I like dumplings."
We each sampled from one another's trays.
The mapo tofu was pretty good, too. I'd have to get that next time.
"Are you two ready for the next class?" Yuuna asked.
"What's the next class?"
"You're really just coasting through life, aren't you, Kim Sang-hyeok?"
"Was that a little too 'D-rank' of me?"
I belatedly opened the academy app and saw that we had a dungeon exploration in the afternoon.
"We're going outside?"
"Outside? What are you talking about?"
Yuuna, seeming to recall my background as a shut-in who refused to attend school, explained in detail.
Amazingly, the academy apparently had a system that could generate dozens of dungeon entrances right on campus.
Am I the only one attending this academy who didn't know that?
"Isn't that dangerous? What's the benefit of having dungeons at the academy?"
"It allows students to grow in a safe environment. There's nothing more dangerous than jumping into this field with nothing but your bare hands."
"So it's a relatively controlled environment?"
"Yep. Compared to the dungeons that appear in various remote regions, the ones generated within Essol Academy have less variance. That's a key characteristic of the land in Korea."
'Less variance.'
In other words, the chance of something dangerous happening inside was low. That's what it seemed to mean.
"Is it different in other countries?"
"It's dangerous. Sometimes, transcendent-grade magical beasts roam around in an untreatable state, so the list of countries with travel bans gets updated every month."
"So they need competent Hunters everywhere."
The status of Hunters must be no joke, then.
It also meant you could expect to earn a significant income.
'It's all starting to make sense.'
The protagonist of Ona-Aka grows stronger by collecting onaholes.
Thinking about why I was given such a cheat-like ability, it must have been to turn the D-rank trash protagonist into a respectable Hunter.
All for the ultimate goal of this eroge: the harem.
The Hunter industry must be full of heroines.
Technically, Yuuna was also a pro Hunter, which made her one of the heroines from that sphere.
The conclusion was that this was one of the game's official routes.
'This has to be it.'
The ramblings of my roommate—the Ona-Aka player, the very person who sent me here—were proving helpful at times like this.
Considering that guy had been glued to it for over 200 hours, Ona-Aka wasn't just a simple eroge. It was a simulation game that involved the concept of developing the protagonist and heroines…
In that case, the "Hunter Route," which required honest growth, was perfect for me.
I'd already given up on the hope of a decent, respectable office job. High risk, high return. Being a Hunter who makes a lot of money was the best.
I just had to avoid disgusting events like the "Villain Route" or becoming "The Worst Villain in History, Onahole Man"… or whatever.
"Anything else you're curious about?"
When it came down to it, Yuuna just had a personality that liked taking care of others. She was trying to help me without a hint of annoyance.
The slightly smug look on her face was almost endearing.
"When you say there's less variance, does that mean Korean dungeons are easy?"
"Of course. That's why there are so many prestigious academies in Korea. It's an environment where only relatively weak dungeons appear. In a place like Russia, where dungeons start at a minimum of A-rank, fostering new talent is extremely difficult."
It made sense. A level 1 slime should appear before a hero who's just started their adventure.
If a level 80 dragon showed up right away, everyone would get wiped out.
The fact that Korea was a good environment for getting stronger step-by-step was a welcome piece of news.
"But still, where have you been hiding all this time? You're asking me things you could find out just by watching the news."
"I was at home watching anime."
Heh. I smoothly dodged Yuuna's interrogation.
The moment I mentioned anime, she immediately lost the will to question me further.
Yeah, I was watching anime at home. What are you gonna do about it?
"What anime?"
Just then, Hena reacted.
I never expected to find a female academy student in front of me who was interested in anime.
"Yeah, what anime? What anime?"
If I told her I'd never seen any of this world's anime, she'd probably be very disappointed.
What should I say…?
"It's an anime full of cute girls, so you probably wouldn't know it, Hena."
I tried naming a genre a girl would never watch.
"Is it by any chance… A Generic Isekai Pure Love Story?"
But it seemed I had underestimated Hena's nerd cred.
For the name of a cute-girl anime to pop out of her mouth just like that.
Is she one of my people?
The dormant weeb inside me stirred slightly.
"What? I like the sound of that title," Yuuna chimed in.
"It's a super popular series. It was number one on Anip for the year! You have to watch it if you haven't!"
So, even in this world, pure love stories were mainstream.
I had been worried that in the world of Ona-Aka—a game that reigned as number one in the eroge industry with its insane perversion levels—everyone secretly preferred things like hypnosis, NTR, and tentacle porn.
Realizing that pure love was a universal value, I felt a strange sense of relief.
"You haven't seen it yet? Then, do you want to watch it together at my place? I have the collector's edition, from episode 1 to 152. Let's binge-watch it together!"
"No, that many at once is a bit…"
Hena, you weren't the type of character to speak so brightly and energetically!
"Then let's just sample it first. Episode 1… no, 'that scene' is in episode 3. So at least up to episode 3. The animation and direction in episode 3 are the best since Director Sakamoto was in charge. The heroine is so cute it's dangerous for your heart…!"
As Hena's anime talk went into overdrive, I lost my words and just watched her.
Even Yuuna couldn't get a word in, so she just nibbled on her mapo tofu, looking back and forth between me and Hena.
'So this is what she's into…'
For some reason, the character trait made sense.
Looking only at her figure and the face hidden by her bangs, I had wondered why she was designed as a nerd-concept heroine.
Turns out there was a plausible reason.
As a considerable otaku myself, I felt a sense of kinship.
I also knew how disappointed she would be if I refused her plea to just "sample" it.
"Alright. Let's give it a try together."
"Really? Really? When? What time? What minute? I-I already know how it ends, but I'll stay quiet like I've never seen it before!"
"This weekend?"
"Y-Yes! This weekend!"
Just like that, I ended up scheduling an anime viewing session with a female classmate (with presumed K-cups).
Well, if the genre was pure love, I had no reason to refuse.
After making the choice, the ridiculous thought crossed my mind: Was that a dating sim choice?
"Ehehe."
If it was, she was looking at me with an expression that said she was already thinking about marriage.
This was worrying. She seemed like the type of girl who would get tied down by some loser and have her life ruined.
I have to look after her.
That doesn't mean I'm looking for a chance to grope her breasts.
If we have a normal friendship, there's no reason for that.
I admit I jumped the gun a bit when we first met, but…
As long as I'm careful, I should be able to maintain a decent relationship without creating any more random eroge events.
'As if we're going to fall for each other in a dungeon.'
I'd be lucky if I didn't just drag down these two heroines, who were both stronger than me.
*
Afternoon class.
Class 2-F moved back to the indoor training facility. Everyone had retrieved necessary items for dungeon clearing from their lockers.
Hena was holding a dark brown, wood-carved staff, and Yuuna, unlike during the last sudden exploration, was thoroughly equipped with a custom belt worn over her uniform and gloves to protect her hands.
Still, in my eyes, going into a dungeon in a uniform that left her bare thighs exposed looked both precarious and tough.
The important thing was that their level of preparation was better than mine.
I was the only one standing there in just a hoodie, with nothing.
"What the. Kim Sang-hyeok, you don't have any personal gear?" Yuuna asked, surprised.
"…"
I did have a lewd magazine in my locker featuring the idol Lizna May, who looked just like the student council president.
Would that be helpful?
I suddenly felt like some pitiful student who couldn't afford expensive equipment due to family circumstances.
And that pitiful aura must have triggered Yuuna's class president senses.
"…We still have time, so follow me!"
Grip.
Yuuna grabbed my hand and pulled me along forcefully.
"Wh-whoa. Hena, I'll be right back."
I left the training facility and followed Yuuna around a corner in the hallway, where a female student who looked sleep-deprived was guarding a door.
"Yuuna? What's up?"
"Chen, can we take a look at some gear?"
"Kim Sang-hyeok? Isn't he D-rank? It's a bit early for him."
"Well, he doesn't even have basic equipment."
This was kind of embarrassing.
The student called Chen looked me up and down from head to toe, then sighed.
"It's not like you'll know how to use anything anyway. …But go on in."
"Yes, ma'am!"
When the door Chen was guarding opened, I was stunned.
A weapon arsenal…?
An incredible variety of weapons and armor were displayed by type. Students who looked like they were from the "Artisan" track were inspecting gear, checking inventory, and performing various other tasks in each section.
"This is Academy Workshop B. It probably has the largest selection of weapons available."
"You can buy weapons here?"
"Yep. How about something like this?"
Yuuna immediately picked up a sword.
Honestly, I had no confidence I could wield a sword as well as Yuuna just by picking one up.
But more importantly…
'It doesn't work with Personality Excretion.'
I hadn't used it enough to be an expert, but Personality Excretion worked well with impact weapons.
It wasn't suited for sharp weapons.
While I could probably induce Personality Excretion to some extent with just contact, it felt best when I delivered a shock to the enemy's body.
That's why I'd put so much effort into my movements when hitting the scarecrow.
It would be harder to do that in a real fight.
"Take a look around."
Just then, a weapon caught my eye.
The modern king of all weapons. A gun.
In my head, I imagined myself as the John Wick of the Personality Excretion industry—a professional killer from some action movie.
'Personality Excretion double-tap, Personality Excretion Mozambique Drill…'
Fucking badass.
-x-X-x-
"Interested in guns? Ever handled one before?"
You bet. I still remember the serial number of my K2.
So, it was only natural that after passing by daggers, spears, swords, and knuckles, I'd take an interest in firearms.
"Yeah, a gun is definitely better than a sword."
Yuuna spoke, looking a little pouty.
"Hmph. But if a gun breaks during a dive, you're finished, aren't you?"
"You don't like guns?"
"Ahem. In the Hunter industry, they're one of the weapons not considered to require 'pure skill.' I'm not the type to be so discriminatory, but there's a tendency to look down on people who use guns, even if they're high-rank. It's good to know."
"Then why are you trying to talk me out of it?"
Was she sulking because I wasn't interested in the same type of weapon as her?
Yuuna pouted and muttered.
"Swords are better…"
…Cute.
"I think I'll go with this one."
I picked up a Glock 19.
Is this the compact version?
It felt a little smaller than the Glock 19 I'd fired at the gun shop, but a full grip was no problem.
Looking at the magazine, I could see it held 15 rounds of 9mm bullets.
"Senior, how much is this?"
"That? 600 Coins."
"…"
I quietly put the Glock back down.
"That's too expensive. Maybe I'll go with these knuckles?"
"Those knuckles are made of a special material. They're 800 Coins."
The knuckles are more expensive than the gun? How is that even possible…?!
As I was agonizing over my choice, Yuuna sidled up next to me.
"I'll buy it for you."
"No. It's too expensive."
"You like the gun, don't you? I'll buy it. Just pay me back!"
"…Haha."
It hadn't been that long since I'd cleared my last debt, and here I was, getting into another one.
But having a gun did seem like it would be reassuring.
"In that case, I think I'll need a gun belt and magazines, too…"
"Give me another 200 Coins and I'll sell it to you as a set. Oh, and since your boyfriend is so handsome, I'll knock 100 Coins off if you buy it all together."
"…Boyfriend…"
"Oh? Am I wrong? Having second thoughts? 700 Coins isn't an amount you just gift a friend for no reason, you know~?"
With a slightly stiff expression, Yuuna held out her student ID.
"P-Please ring it up."
"Should we really forget it, Yuuna?"
"No! No… It's fine…"
Even if she was a pro Hunter, this didn't seem like an amount you could just take from a classmate. Should I refuse?
Yuuna looked back at me, seeing my concern, and forced a smile.
"When I first started as a Hunter, I was at a complete loss, too. I had nothing, and no one to help me."
"Yuuna…"
"I made a promise to myself back then. That if I ever got to a position where I could help someone, I would."
So that's why she was giving such a huge gift to me, someone with no weapon…
"You're going to become a Hunter and make a lot of money, right?"
"Of course."
I casually approached the senior who was processing the payment.
"Senior. Just a moment. Could you give me a little more of a discount?"
"What? No way."
"Is my face only worth a 100-Coin discount? Please, take a closer look."
"…"
She was a female senior, so it just might work.
I simply moved closer and gazed at her intently, and the senior's face gradually turned red.
"Ah, alright, I get it. So… don't stick your face so close."
Heh.
A face like this gets a discount with just a look.
"200 Coins…?"
"How about another 50 Coins off if I take a picture with you?"
"…Ah, a p-picture? In that case…"
"Another 30 if I put my arm around you."
"Ah, ahh…!?"
"And I'll smile like thiiiis, so please give me another 50 Coins off~"
"…Hah… O-Okay…"
I sweet-talked her relentlessly until she was dazed, managing to haggle the Glock full package down to 400 Coins.
After taking a few selfies with my arm around the senior, I returned.
"I put in a little effort. What do you think?"
"…It actually worked."
The senior was already showing off the pictures we took to her colleagues.
"If they'd been male seniors, you could have done it too, Yuuna?"
"N-No way! I can't! It's too embarrassing just thinking about it."
I was just teasing, I already knew the answer.
A modest woman is the best, after all.
"Kim Sang-hyeok. Is there anyone you like?"
"Hm?"
"I was just wondering if you had a girlfriend, since you're so handsome."
"I don't."
"You could probably date anyone you set your mind to, though?"
She probably thought that because I had the kind of looks that could get me anyone I wanted…
"I don't want to date just for the sake of it. Not unless it's someone I really like."
"That's true. It has to be someone you really like…"
"Do you have a boyfriend?"
"Nope, none! Never have!"
Would Yuuna say yes if I asked her out?
As I stared intently into her eyes, the atmosphere somehow became moist and heart-pounding.
"D-Do you like the weapon?"
"Yeah. I think it'll go well with Personality Excretion."
"…How is your main skill called Personality Excretion."
Sadly, the moment the words "Personality Excretion" were spoken, that atmosphere vanished without a trace.
Is this the curse of the eroge?
"Hena's waiting, let's go back."
"R-Right."
"Thanks for buying me the weapon."
"Work hard and pay me back! I didn't give it to you for free."
I holstered the Glock in the gun holster I bought with it. Five spare magazines.
I decided to store the remaining bullets in my inventory and reload as needed.
Now that I've bought it, I'm kind of tempted by things like a compensator.
But I didn't have the gall to ask her to buy that for me too.
I figured I'd try upgrading it as soon as I paid off my debt.
I'll have to work hard. This academy life.
We returned to Hena, who was waiting anxiously.
She was already surrounded by male students, which made my steps quicken.
"You're Hena, right? Come with us."
"Join our squad and we'll give you a bigger share of the Coins. Double. How about it?"
"How about a duo with me? I swear I won't do anything weird…"
"N-No…"
I look away for one second and this happens…
"Hena!"
"S-Sang-hyeok!"
Hena's face lit up like a puppy hearing its master's call, and she ran over to me.
She stuck close to my side and gripped my hand tightly.
"I-… I'm in a party with Sang-hyeok… so… I'm sorry…"
"…A D-rank…"
What are you muttering about? If you've accepted defeat, then get lost. Shoo.
I'm reminded every time of the enormous advantages a man gets just by being tall and handsome.
Just like the saying goes that handsome guys shouldn't work out, if my rank were to get higher too, honestly, the sense of deprivation for the other males would be off the charts…
Aren't I basically a walking harem generator?
"Were you properly telling them 'N-O'?"
"Yes…! But they kept insisting, and I didn't know what to do…"
Yuuna was staring at our conversation, dumbfounded.
"Is Hena some little kid?"
"Hena is a little baby."
"You can't keep letting her be so coddled. Hena. It's not 'N-O.' It's 'Stop bothering me and get lost.' Repeat after me."
"…"
As if that kind of input would work on a baby.
While I was at the armory, it seemed like half of the F-class students had already entered the dungeons.
"The remaining students, form groups of three. If you plan to match as a solo or duo, tell the teacher beforehand."
A group of three. A squad?
I looked back and forth between Yuuna and Hena.
"We're a team, right?"
"I was originally going solo, but I'll go with you. I'm worried about you two on your own."
As for Hena, well, just seeing her clinging to me, it was obvious she planned on going with me.
"Oh my. Yuuna, are you going as a squad? Who's the leader?"
"That would be me, teacher. Please recommend the tastiest dungeon."
"As it happens, there's one C-rank dungeon left for a squad. Go to B-3."
It seemed that going as a trio allowed us to enter a fairly high-rank dungeon.
The point designated B-3 was a section of the indoor training ground, divided into squares like a chessboard.
Dungeons were generated in each of these squares by a gravity wave induction device, and just like before, a white gravity wave was shimmering.
They all looked similar, but the C-rank dungeon's gravity wave was subtly different. It felt like it rippled more.
It was hard to explain precisely…
[Activating Insight - Red]
[C- Rank Dungeon]
[#9319. Monsters of the Lake]
[Rarity C-] [Reward C-] [Anomaly D]
[Max Participants - 3 (Squad)]
Hmm. Seeing it like this makes it perfectly clear.
Insight - Red is a truly useful skill.
"With the three of us, we should be able to handle most situations. Let's go!"
Just then.
Dihrit appeared out of nowhere, pushed Yuuna aside, and occupied the dungeon entrance.
"Oops."
"…Ugh! What the!"
"Sorry, but we already claimed this dungeon."
"What? No one was here. What do you mean you claimed it?"
"All three of us just happened to need the bathroom at the same time. Now, would you mind moving? We'll be taking this C-rank dungeon."
Dihrit was also in a 'squad.'
On either side of him were a girl smirking obnoxiously and a short-haired male student.
"Don't cut in line. You know this kind of power play is really childish, right?"
"Power play? Me? When the sum of all three of your scores doesn't even come close to mine?"
When did he even check our scores?
"If anything, even if I was late, shouldn't you have moved aside on your own so you wouldn't hold back an A-rank honor student like me?"
"What kind of logic is that?"
Hena, looking scared, clung to me, gripping my hand tightly.
Our leader didn't seem to have any intention of backing down. But honestly, if a fight broke out here, wouldn't both sides lose out?
Dihrit Ade.
He'd hated me from the first day. His cronies didn't seem to think much of me either.
Was it because I was an onahole collector?
The fact that I, who should have been kicked out of this academy long ago, was still here was an eyesore to him.
Ade's cold gaze seemed to be saying just that.
"Hey, D. What's with that pistol? A D-rank couldn't possibly have the money for that, so, aha. Our pro Hunter must have emptied her poor wallet to buy it for you, huh?"
"…What are you trying to say?"
"It's fun playing king among the weak, isn't it? It suits weaklings like you to coddle each other like that."
"Don't you talk about my friends like that."
Yuuna placed her hand on the hilt of her sword.
"Friends? You can only call someone a friend when you're equals. For your information, my score is 2,500. Atali's is 1,700, and Wilhelm's is 2,000. How about that? You need to be at least at this level to be called 'friends' for the first time."
"The way you even consider rank when making friends is just pathetic."
"Nakamori Yuuna. They say hanging out with a D-rank makes you think like one, and it seems they were right. How about you run a 3D dungeon, one that's more your speed?"
"You bastard…!"
I was about to tell her not to engage with him, but it seemed I was already too late.
Instead of dealing with Dihrit, I activated Insight[Red] and scanned our surroundings.
My mythical-grade skill, 'Insight - Red,' could determine a dungeon's rank just by glancing at its gravity wave.
I had a feeling there might be a good, hidden dungeon somewhere.
[C(B) Rank Dungeon]
[#7119. Golden Orc Fortress] [Rarity C] [Reward B+] [Anomaly B]
[A demon merchant will appear in this dungeon]
[This dungeon possesses an anomaly level above the standard, and its rank will increase upon meeting certain conditions]
[Reward Multiplier +3]
[Max Participants - 3 (Squad)]
Found it.
A super-sweet dungeon that no one had entered yet.
Now there was no reason to assign any meaning to the dungeon Dihrit was obsessed with.
"That's it, I'm not holding back anymore! I challenge you to a due—"
"Wait!"
I stepped between Yuuna and Dihrit.
Yuuna was taken aback, and Dihrit's glare on me grew even fiercer.
"What is it, D-rank?"
"Calm down, Yuuna. He said all three of them really had to use the bathroom."
"That's a ridiculous excuse…"
"Dihrit. You guys take it. That dungeon."
No, actually, I'd rather you guys hurry up and get lost in that dungeon.
So we can reap the rewards in peace.
"A D-rank knows his place, I see. I guess someone who's crawled on the floor knows how to crawl best?"
"To be honest, I was getting a little scared. It's a real relief that you're taking it."
"…Hahahat! Scared of a C-rank dungeon? Yuuna, what were you even trying to do with a coward like this?"
"…"
"We'll go to another one, yeah. A 3D dungeon or something. Good luck, Dihrit."
"Shut up. I don't need your encouragement. Just check the ranking board later to see how much we earned."
Dihrit's gang disappeared into the dungeon, laughing.
Yuuna, left behind, was so agitated her face was flushed red.
"He insulted you and your friend Hena! Are you telling me you're just going to let him go without even a duel? Kim Sang-hyeok, is that all you are?"
"Calm down. We came here to make money."
"But now we've been kicked out of the dungeon we were going to. What are we going to do now…?"
"We have two choices. One, run a 3D dungeon with a loser's mindset."
Yuuna's gaze sharpened.
Seeing her emotions laid so bare, she looked ready to turn her back on me and walk away.
"I hope you like the second choice more than the first."
"Second, we go to a quasi-B-rank dungeon that even Dihrit didn't know about."
"…What?"
I explained my Insight skill to the two of them.
How I could get a brief overview of a dungeon's information before entering.
And how I'd already spotted another, better dungeon while Yuuna was arguing with Dihrit.
Once she realized this, Yuuna's anger subsided completely.
"Y-You should have told me…"
"It was better that I didn't. If you were fuming and puffing your cheeks, wouldn't Dihrit have entered that C-rank dungeon with even more satisfaction?"
"…I wasn't puffing my cheeks!"
"Let's go. Guys who are obsessed with rank like that just need to be crushed by rank later."
"Still, that's amazing… I never knew a skill like that existed."
"Me too… Sang-hyeok is amazing…"
Hena and Yuuna expressed their awe for my Insight skill in unison.
It was probably a rare skill even in the Hunter industry.
After all, it was a 'Mythical-grade' skill bestowed upon me by the goddess, the master of this Onahoaka world.
In terms of value, it was on par with Lucky Pervert, which manipulates reality, and Personality Excretion, which expels personalities.
Gaining an edge in the minor information wars within the academy was a piece of cake.
"The problem is, this dungeon's rank will rise to B-rank if we meet the conditions after entering. If you don't think you can do it, Yuuna, we'll have to back out."
The clearance of this dungeon would depend entirely on Yuuna's abilities.
I conveyed that fact clearly.
"Are you okay with that, Yuuna?"
However.
Perhaps the encounter with Dihrit had lit a fire under her. Yuuna was burning with motivation.
"Is that even a question? This is a risk we have to take! Just follow my lead!"
"Alright, let's go~!"
"W-Wait for me, Sang-hyeok."
[Entering Dungeon]
[Participants - Nakamori Yuuna, Kim Sang-hyeok, Henna Isis]
The exploration had begun.
-x-X-x-
[Entering the Golden Orc Fortress]
[Golden Rule 1: Coin drops for hunting 'Minions of the Golden Domain' are tripled.]
[Golden Rule 2: Coin drops for boss-level 'Minions of the Golden Domain' are multiplied by 20.]
"Kyaa! I can't believe it!"
As soon as we dived, I heard Yuuna's happy scream.
"It's the 'Golden' domain, the one where you can earn the most! The competition for this place is insane. I can't believe a honey pot dungeon like this spawned at the academy!"
"You're this happy when we haven't even cleared it yet?"
"Clear it? Of course we're going to! Alright, everyone, check your belongings and weapons. Let's move out."
Everything was fine except for my smartphone.
"You okay, Hena?"
"Yeah, I'm okay like this."
Hena was holding my hand tightly.
A small, white, soft hand, contrasting with my strong, masculine hand with its prominent veins.
As expected of this vigorous body, I felt like I was going to get hard just from holding her hand.
'Don't get carried away…'
I wasn't on a backpacking trip with two pretty girls.
My body was already excited as if that were the case, but this was a dungeon where dangerous magical beasts lurked.
If I didn't keep my head straight, things would get dangerous.
Just by touching the space-distorting gravity wave, we'd been transported to a completely different world, not the academy.
From the looks of it, we were in a ruin buried beneath a desert.
'Last time it was a forest.'
The map was different this time.
In front and behind us were dark passages, wide enough for about three people to walk through. From the wide-open ceiling, sunlight and fine sand poured down like a waterfall.
Yuuna turned to me while stretching.
"Kim Sang-hyeok. Have you ever shown Hena your skill? Wouldn't it be better to tell her beforehand so she doesn't get shocked?"
She seemed worried because of her own experience of being shocked.
She had a very good point.
"But how am I supposed to explain this?"
"…You're right…"
My attack induces excretion in my enemies?
It was probably better not to say anything…
I still didn't know everything about Personality Excretion myself. The only thing I really knew was that it was the eroge goddess En's preference.
And that it had outstanding compatibility with the 'Onahole Collector' talent possessed by the protagonist of 'Onahole Academy'.
Personally, I thought of it as an endgame skill because of its ability to ignore the enemy's defense.
"Hena, behind you!"
Yuuna drew her sword. It seemed a perfect subject to demonstrate it on had just appeared.
"Guooooargh!"
A green monster, much larger than a goblin, raised its arm toward Hena.
"I'll take it!"
I immediately pulled out my Glock and aimed.
"Hena, cover your ears!"
Bang!
The bullet cleanly embedded itself in the orc's head. But it was tougher than I thought, and I couldn't stop it completely.
'It's fine.'
I just needed to land a hit first, then I could take my time activating the skill.
'Personality Excretion.'
It might have endured a headshot, but it wouldn't endure an excretion shot.
"Gwik!?"
I was sure of my victory. The orc that was about to attack Hena had started staggering, clutching its stomach.
"Looks like there's no need to hit it again," Yuuna remarked, seeing that it was over in one shot.
「Personality Excretion」 boasted outstanding power. Soon, the orc's tattered pants bulged, and a dark gray Personality Jelly popped out.
"Ugh! How disgusting…"
Yuuna recoiled, disgusted.
"What is this?"
"It's something like the orc's soul."
She could understand it easily if I said it was a concept similar to a soul.
Since neither a personality nor a soul is a tangible thing you can physically excrete, Hena would probably understand if I explained it as materializing that concept and pulling it out of the body.
"Is it dead?" Hena asked again.
"No. The Personality Jelly is still connected to the main body."
「Insight - Red」 sees even the unseen.
The Personality Jelly was still connected to the main body like a Bluetooth device. Meaning…
If I gave the mindlessly approaching jelly a light kick…
"Gwi, gwikik."
The main body groaned in response. Everything up to this point was as I expected.
"This is weird…"
"I didn't even do much, but it feels like I'm severely abusing it."
I thought so too.
It was bad enough to make even a Hunter, someone who takes the lives of magical beasts, feel uncomfortable. That said it all.
It might have been partly because Yuuna was a good person, but…
"Now, to finish it."
I stomped hard on the Personality Jelly and quietly chanted.
"Become an onahole."
Using the Personality Jelly as the material, I created an onahole.
The onahole becomes the personality's new body, so the connection to the original body instantly becomes faint.
In other words, the original body becomes nothing more than an empty shell.
"This is my skill, Hena."
"The orc became cute."
…
Hm. Right. Let's just say it became cute.
At least Hena didn't find me disgusting.
It was the same with the onahole; she reacted like this even when she saw something so dark and vulgar right in front of her.
It was beyond naive; you could almost call it defenseless.
Yuuna had a complicated expression, as if wondering whether Hena's reaction was an act or not.
Hena is the real deal…
[You have acquired the skill [Firearm Mastery] ]
It seemed that when you incarnated a Personality Jelly into an onahole and turned the main body into a shell, it counted as a kill.
After all, there was no more complete way to neutralize something.
"Guwok. Guwooork."
"Gweeeik."
The orcs must have heard the gunshot, because they started swarming us.
"I'll handle the front by myself! I can leave the rear to you, right, Kim Sang-hyeok?"
"You saw, didn't you? These guys are one-shot for me."
"If it keeps going well, that is."
Did I not mention it? I'm Kim Sang-hyeok, a marksman certified by the Ministry of National Defense.
Big targets like them, squeezing their bloated bodies together as they approached down a narrow passage with nowhere to hide—they were as good as dead!
"Cover your ears, Hena!"
Click.
I felt something catch. It was a failure to feed, just as I'd feared.
'It's jamming now, of all times?'
"Guwooork!"
Just as I was about to charge in for a fistfight, Hena stepped forward as if to protect me.
I was a little shocked by that.
I never imagined that she, who I thought was someone I had to protect no matter what, would so bravely protect me.
Even though I knew I shouldn't, I might have been looking down on Hena in a way.
"I'll handle this."
Hena blocked the orc's attack with her ebony staff and cast 'Formless Magic Bullet'.
She pushed back the orc, which was bigger than her, with a shockwave.
Meanwhile, I cleared the jammed round from the chamber and aimed again.
'They did say guns break down easily inside dungeons.'
Don't panic. Panicking is more fatal than a jam… or so I thought!
Click!
"Son of a…!"
Jamming twice in a row was just not right!
"Isn't this thing defective!?"
Yuuna, who had already taken care of three orcs, giggled.
"What did I tell you~?"
"…This isn't a 5% chance, that's for sure!"
"Your Dexterity stat is still low and your mastery skill is at the lowest rank. The malfunction rate is probably over 30%. For your information, the power is reduced too."
What, I had to use a gun with all those bullshit debuffs inside a dungeon?
Anyway, I fixed the jam again, racked the slide, and aimed.
Hena had already dealt with two orcs by then.
'Hena's overall evaluation was higher than mine, wasn't it…'
When you thought about it, she was my senior when it came to clearing dungeons.
The lewd childhood friend who hiccuped when her breasts were squeezed was also a model student at the academy…!
I discarded the pathetic idea that my gun would always live up to my expectations.
"I'll protect you, Sang-hyeok."
"It's fine. Send a few my way!"
[Yaksha Charge]
Instead of just aiming from the back, I used a charge skill to slam into an orc with my body.
Then, I fired.
'Personality Excretion Double Tap!'
Bang! Bang!
"Gwiik!?"
One orc eliminated.
"Let's do this together, Hena."
"This is the first time… you've said that to me."
"Did I used to use you as a shield or something?"
"U-uh? Yes…"
Dammit. Now I really couldn't back down!
"Personality Excretion Soccer Kick!"
"Gwiik!?"
I thought this was a place where I could fight with just my gun, but I had to constantly check the Glock that jammed as if it were breathing and even resort to hand-to-hand combat just to pull my own weight.
Hena's magic. [Formless Magic Bullet] never malfunctioned, its power was strong, and it was fast.
Even though it was probably the most basic form of magic, I could see it was far more effective than a gun inside a dungeon.
'I can accept that it jams a lot.'
The reduced power was what really hurt.
In fact, without Personality Excretion, wouldn't I have needed to land about four shots to kill one?
'At least it's a one-shot kill. That's good.'
Right. It wasn't all downsides. I could take down orcs with the same finishing power as Yuuna, a skilled B-rank Hunter.
An orc that went down never got back up…
Bang!
"Become an onahole."
And I muttered it charismatically.
Hena, who had been watching me quietly from the side, raised her staff and shouted.
"I want to do it too."
"Do what?"
"Become an onahole! Hya!"
"Pfft…!"
Yuuna, who was fighting in the back, burst out laughing.
"Alright! Let's do it together!"
Hunting should be fun, right?
"Become an onahole!"
"Become an onahooole!"
Hena had become the mysterious onahole girl.
[You have leveled up.]
[You have leveled up.]
[The level of Firearm Mastery has increased.]
Oh, nice.
As we easily dispatched dozens of orcs like cutting a cake, my stagnant experience bar exploded.
My growth plates had burst wide open!
[You have leveled up.]
[You have leveled up.]
Bang! Bang! Bang!
Hena supported me, adding her Formless Magic Bullets to the mix.
"The orcs are getting cuter, Sang-hyeok!"
"Yeah. Become an onahole!"
"Become an onahole! Hehe. It's like a magic spell."
"Hena! A girl shouldn't be saying 'onahole, onahole'!"
The Personality Jellies also had slightly different colors for each individual. In Hena's eyes, the disgusting orcs were turning into colorful toys, so it wasn't that strange for her to say they were 'getting cuter'.
'We're starting to overwhelm them with firepower.'
The malfunction rate hadn't decreased, but my hands had gotten faster at dealing with jams.
Hena could also just pour out magic bullets without worrying about close-quarters combat with the orcs, so our job became simpler.
Soon, the last one fell to my excretion shot.
[The level of Firearm Mastery has increased.]
[You have leveled up.]
[You have acquired the skill [Onahole Enhancement] ]
What's this?
[Onahole Enhancement] has decided on this onahole!!… Generally enhances the abilities of an onahole.
A buff skill? What the hell happens when you enhance an onahole?
Does the tightness or durability get better…?
"Why? Sang-hyeok? Did you learn a new skill?"
…
This wasn't something I could discuss with my big-breasted childhood friend who was looking at me with her pretty eyes.
Would Yuuna understand?
"Did you learn another weird skill?"
I was about to ask if I could treat her like an onahole, but I stopped myself.
"Let's just pick them up for now."
[Ordinary Orc Onahole]
[An onahole created by embodying the personality of a beastly Orc. Characterized by its rough texture.]
[Rarity: C]
[Tightness C+ | Durability C | Warmth D | Response D]
[Personality does not collapse (100%)]
---
[First Orc Onahole collected!]
[Strength +3]
[Agility +3]
[Dexterity +3]
[Stamina +3]
[Orc Onahole (Well-made)]
[Rarity: C+]
[Tightness C+ | Durability C+ | Warmth C | Response D]
[Personality does not collapse (100%)]
[You have collected an Orc Onahole (Well-made).]
[Strength +2]
"Open Onahole Inventory."
Unfortunately, there were no masterpiece-grade drops.
Hena squatted down and started picking up the onaholes with me.
"It looks cute. It's trembling, prrr, prrr."
"…"
Yuuna, seemingly disgusted by the thought of touching them, just crossed her arms and looked away.
She was the normal one here. It wasn't like I was eager to touch them, either.
I was only collecting them because they were byproducts of my power.
Still, the bonuses from the onahole collection were too sweet to pass up.
"If you've gotten the collection bonus, do you really need to scrape up all the rest?"
"You've got a point. It's not like I'm going to use them."
"Then let's just leave them. How are we supposed to find and carry all of these?"
They were all mixed up with the orc husks, and picking them out was becoming a pain.
I agreed with Yuuna and stood up.
"The leader should be nearby."
Yuuna was right.
In a nearby chamber, an orc with the build of a warrior was waiting for us.
[Orc Champion]:
[The leader of the orcs. Possesses more refined combat skills and a massive body.]
"Guwooooork!"
Bang!
I immediately fired my Glock. But the creature swatted my bullet away with its sword as if it had seen it coming.
Damn, the system really hates guns…
Anyone could see that was a system-assisted block.
It was as if the game itself was saying, "No ranged cheese allowed~." I saw the orc's arm move the exact moment I pulled the trigger.
"Don't worry. We'll make an opening for you."
Just then, Yuuna dashed forward to set the stage for me.
"I'll break its stance! Hena, follow up!"
"Okay!"
I simply lowered my gun and watched.
"Guooork!"
Yuuna leaped, fluidly dodging the Orc Champion's wide swing, then slashed its thick thigh, forcing it to its knees.
As if on cue, Hena struck the orc's upper body with a magic bullet, turning the beast into a dazed target.
"Kuuuk!?"
"Now! Kim Sang-hyeok!"
Paying my respects to their teamwork, I aimed my Glock.
'Excretion' tab.
Bang! Bang!
"Kngh!?"
The Orc Champion collapsed, excreting a personality jelly.
Heh…
I lowered the muzzle and struck a pose.
"Be freed from the shackles of the mortal world… and become an onahole."
Poof.
The Orc Champion's jelly sublimated into a masterpiece.
"If you didn't have that handsome face, that line would be a crime."
"Become an onahole! Hiyah!"
"See? Now Hena's copying you."
"What's the big deal? We're all adults here."
I collected the final onahole that had dropped from the champion.
I had a good feeling about it the moment I picked it up.
[Orc Onahole (Masterpiece)]
[A masterpiece-grade Orc Onahole that appears once in a thousand. The jelly quality is high as it was obtained from a champion. Its rough texture and powerful tightness are superb.]
[Tightness B | Durability B | Warmth C | Response D]
[Personality does not collapse (100%)]
---
[You have collected an Orc Onahole (Masterpiece).]
[Dexterity +5]
[Agility +4]
[Strength +5]
[Mana +3]
[Your level has increased.]
[Your level has increased.]
[You have earned the achievement "Orc Onahole Conqueror".]
[Strength +3]
[You Never Thought You'd Become Holes, Did You?]
[collection bonus achieved!]
Aaaah.
Sweet. So sweet!
"So? Do you like the Glock?"
"Aside from the fact that it jams all the time."
"That'll get better as you raise your Dexterity."
'Dexterity,' huh…
I also needed the strength to pull monsters off Hena. Maybe I should prioritize Strength second.
"You said you could buy stats, right? Can I buy them from the Demon Merchant?"
Yuuna stared at me as if she'd seen a ghost.
"Demon Merchant? How does a D-rank like you know about that?"
Her tone wasn't one of looking down on me for being D-rank, but rather one of pure shock, as if to say, 'There's no way a D-rank would know about something like that.'
"I read that one appears in this dungeon."
"…"
Yuuna's expression turned serious.
"Did I say something wrong?"
"No… I'll tell you later."
Rumble, rumble, rumble.
Just then, the dungeon began to vibrate.
[Condition [Orc Annihilation] met.]
[Golden Domain strengthening… Dungeon rank has risen to B.]
[Additional rewards added.]
The underground ruins suddenly rose to the surface.
We were in a desert, under a scorching sun.
But the stage wasn't the only thing that had changed. The bodies of the orcs we had killed were coated in gold and began to rise again.
"Hena! Over here!"
"Okay!"
All the orcs we had killed were resurrected.
But I extracted their personalities.
Their movements were mindless.
It was as if they were being controlled by someone.
[Activating 「Insight - Red」.]
[Golden Orc]
[Rank: B]
[A magical beast reborn under the control of the Golden Domain. It has grown stronger.]
---
[Golden Orc Champion]
[Rank: B+]
[An elite magical beast reborn under the control of the Golden Domain. It has grown much stronger.]
"Stay right behind me!" Yuuna said, her expression tense as she raised her sword. "We're up against B-rank monsters. I might not have a chance to protect you, so stay sharp."
The battle began instantly, with no time to prepare.
Hena immediately fired an invisible magic bullet, but the Golden Orc's body didn't budge.
"Ah…! My magic… it's not working…"
Yuuna swung her sword, felling the approaching orcs like autumn leaves.
From here on out, it was Yuuna's show.
Personality Excretion could still be useful, but…
In this situation, I might accidentally hit Yuuna in the back.
That thought kept me from jumping in carelessly.
For now, I fell back, focusing on protecting Hena.
"You're doing great, Kim Sang-hyeok."
"Princess! I believe in you!"
"I'll show you why I'm a B-rank solo."
She was more than just a tough high school girl fighting in her uniform.
Is this what a pro looks like?
Even as the vicious golden monsters swarmed her, Yuuna didn't flinch. If anything, she seemed to shine even brighter.
The sword skills she'd shown when blocking the passage earlier were just the tip of the iceberg.
Her [Ink Wash Slash] covered a wide area.
Her [Frenzied Dance] instantly shredded any enemy that got too close.
Yuuna's A-rank attack skills shattered the Golden Orcs' tough bodies.
"One's headed your way!"
Hena immediately used her magic, but it only seemed to enrage the Golden Orc further.
"Eek!"
Terrified, Hena clung to me.
"S-Sang-hyeok. We have to run…!"
"No."
Now that the mobs were tougher, I could finally strike a real pose.
If you jam on me now, I'll really resent you, En-chan.
Please let me look cool in front of the heroine…
I aimed the Glock and fired three shots into the Golden Orc's chest.
The Mozambique Drill was a standard two to the chest, one to the head to increase stopping power.
But…
The Excretion Drill is two to the chest, one to the stomach.
The shot to the stomach was the decisive blow.
Bang, bang! Bang!
Since the orc was being controlled by the golden power, there was no amusing reaction.
[Your level has increased.]
But it went down easily.
I had wondered what it would excrete without a personality to expel, and a golden jelly came out.
But the jelly soon vanished along with the orc's golden coating.
It must have been some kind of pseudo-personality used to control the orc.
And I had made it excrete even that.
"It's okay now."
"It's okay…?"
Hena hugged me tightly, looking up with teary eyes.
Mm. This is what being a protagonist is all about.
It was cliché, but it was sweet.
As sweet as the warmth and softness of the breasts pressing against my body.
Soon, Yuuna had nearly cleared out the other side.
And then.
She finally faced the leader.
"Kngh!"
This time, even B-rank solo Yuuna seemed to be struggling.
Her opponent was an enhanced B-rank boss. Just breaking its stance wasn't easy.
"Yuuna! Can you handle it?"
"Of course… I can!"
It was amazing that she could match it in a contest of strength, given her small and slender frame compared to the orc's.
Truly incredible.
Soon, her blade flashed, and Yuuna's Ink Wash Slash, which split the wide space into three, found its mark.
"Krrrk!?"
"Dihrit… you bastard!"
Haha…
With a battle cry befitting the class president, Yuuna cleanly finished off the B-rank elite boss.
[Dungeon Cleared]
[Contribution 71% | MVP: Nakamori Yuuna]
[Others - Kim Sang-hyeok, Henna Isis]
"Wow. Yuuna, you're amazing," Hena said in awe.
Yuuna was the hero this time, too.
The sight of her walking toward us, dignified and proud after felling a mountain-sized monster with a single sword.
I never thought I'd find a girl walking with her school skirt fluttering so cool.
"Good work, Yuuna."
"You managed to rack up some contribution this time, huh? Kim Sang-hyeok."
"Thanks to the weapon someone bought me."
Yuuna, looking thirsty, found a water bottle in her bag and gulped it down without hesitation.
"Want some?"
Maybe it was the hot sun. We had all started sweating quite a bit after coming outside.
I accepted it without protest and took a drink.
"Is it going to be dismantled soon?"
"Not yet. If what you said about the Demon Merchant appearing is true…"
What was the big deal about it, anyway?
"Is there a problem?"
"First, let me distribute the earnings."
[Leader Nakamori Yuuna has initiated a trade.]
[Henna Isis - 960 Coins]
[Kim Sang-hyeok - 1,188 Coins]
"Less than I thought."
"This is a huge haul for a single B-rank dungeon. For reference, I got 2,000 Coins."
So the leader gets to decide the distribution…
"If you have any objections, speak now."
Hena just shook her head back and forth.
"This is my first time ever getting a share… I'm so happy… Ehehe…"
"…"
Yuuna's gaze sharpened.
"You… did you stiff her on her pay?"
"I-I don't know what you're talking about…"
I tried to play dumb, but Yuuna's suspicious glare didn't fade.
"You know you get blacklisted in the Hunter industry if you rip people off, right?"
"First time I'm hearing it, but I have no intention of ripping her off…"
"Y-Yeah… It's okay if S-Sang-hyeok takes it all. I'm…"
"It's not okay even if you say it is! That's the law!"
Given Yuuna's personality, she would have given me more if anything, not shorted me.
In fact, I transferred 400 of the coins deposited on my student ID to Yuuna.
"I'll pay you back right away, Yuuna."
"I already deducted it from your share."
"Was my contribution that high…?"
Yuuna couldn't meet my eyes.
"Well. You did better than I expected… Just consider it payment."
"Though I was thinking about choosing something other than a gun, like you said."
"It definitely suited you more than a sword."
It seemed she had recognized my combat style.
A style based on hand-to-hand combat, supplemented by an easy-to-handle pistol.
"I-I'm sorry I wasn't much help at the end…"
"Is this about your contribution score? Stop fidgeting! Straighten your back."
Yuuna gave Hena's slumped shoulders a firm pat.
I'd gotten one of those, too.
"But… it really was low…"
"The main dealer always sweeps the contribution score. That's just how it's structured. But the person who gets the most respect in a party is the one who provides good support."
"If it weren't for Hena, I would've been rolling around on the floor with that orc."
"…"
As I joined in on the praise, Hena's cheeks turned bright red.
I rolled up my sleeves and looked up at the brightly shining sun.
It's getting hot. I kind of want to go back…
Just as I had that thought, I saw a small human figure in the distance, its body and face covered in rags. It carried a bundle on its back that was larger than its own body.
Is that him?
"I'll answer your question from before," Yuuna said.
"It's true that you buy stats from the Demon Merchant. The Demon Merchant sells everything that exists in this world, and even things that don't."
"I need to buy a ton of Dexterity."
"I-I need Mana…"
"This is the first time for both of you, right? Meeting a Demon Merchant."
It was for me, obviously, and Hena nodded as well.
It seemed the Demon Merchant didn't appear in low-rank dungeons.
But why was Yuuna so wary?
She didn't have this expression even when the B-rank elite boss was charging at us with a horde of Golden Orcs.
"Don't think that just because he's a merchant, you'll get service equivalent to the money you pay."
"What do you mean?"
"The Demon Merchant is an unknown entity that only occasionally appears in dungeons. I've heard its actual combat power is comparable to an S-rank monster."
"…"
So, if that thing suddenly attacked us, we'd be helpless?
"If we were on the verge of starvation, he'd probably try to sell us a single bottle of water for 500,000 Coins without batting an eye."
"Oh, my. We are not so wicked as all that."
The figure that had seemed so far away against the horizon was now right next to us.
Yuuna jumped back in surprise and shut her mouth.
"A pleasure to meet you, dear aspiring hunters."
[Activating 「Insight - Red」.]
[Goblin King]
[Demon Merchant]
[The one who commands the magical beast [Goblin]. His power, which once defied a god, is comparable to an SS-rank Hunter.]
I'd better not mess with him…
His build was that of an ordinary goblin, but the information from Insight was ominous.
He was not an opponent I could handle with my current strength.
But there was no reason to fight, was there? If we could just make a reasonable trade, it might be fine…
Or maybe that was just me being too optimistic.
The nerve I had to talk back to a goddess might come in handy here.
On behalf of the frozen Yuuna and Hena, I returned the Goblin King's greeting.
"Hello, Goblin King."
"Ooh, how long has it been since I was greeted with such polite courtesy? I am moved, Mr. Kim Sang-hyeok."
…I never told him my name.
Then again, he never introduced himself as the Goblin King either, so I guess we were even.
"Since we have met like this, it must be fate. I shall lay out my wares and exchange them for your coins."
He seemed surprisingly easy to talk to.
"How much for Dexterity?"
"Dexterity~~~ I'm not quite in the mood to sell that right now."
"Aw, come on."
"I cannot. It is not a Dexterity mood. Regrettably…"
What the hell is he talking about…
"Then Strength?"
"Ah, the weather is far too sunny to sell Strength."
"Stamina?"
"To sell Stamina, when I watched such a sad drama last night."
…For fuck's sake. What does he want me to do?
"As it happens, I am in the mood to sell Mana. Now, looking at your stats…"
That would be for Hena.
"Sell it to Hena."
"I shall take a mere 5,000 Coins per point."
"What!" Yuuna shrieked.
"The standard market price for Hena's Mana stat should be 200 Coins!"
"But my price is 5,000 Coins."
"...Ngh..."
Hena mumbled hesitantly.
"I-I don't have that kind of money…"
"Haha. What a shame."
Hmm.
I was starting to get how this Demon Merchant system worked.
For example, let's say there was a student who inherited hundreds of millions of coins before entering the academy.
To raise their stats, they'd have to clear a high-difficulty dungeon and meet the Demon Merchant. But what if that guy demanded 10 billion for a single point of Strength?
To make a reasonable trade with the Demon Merchant, you need power.
In other words, we couldn't buy anything right now.
"Do you happen to purchase useful items as well, Goblin King?"
"Ooh. Mr. Sang-hyeok. Of course, of course. Have you found something good?"
"I'm just asking just in case, but you don't deal in things like precious metals, do you?"
"…"
The Goblin King's expression twisted.
His mouth curled into what looked like a vicious smile.
"If you inquired about selling me items only to offer such trash, I may have to impose a penalty, Mr. Sang-hyeok."
"…"
"Now, now, what is it you wish to sell? Do you know what could possibly interest me, who possesses all things?"
"S-Sang-hyeok…"
Yuuna grabbed my sleeve.
She looked genuinely frightened, a rare sight.
"Let's just stop talking to him…"
"I have something to sell."
Who did he think he was threatening?
I had something that couldn't be found anywhere else in the world.
Even before I took it out, I had a certain kind of conviction. 'Isn't this how you're supposed to use this?'
"Open Onahole Inventory."
I showed him an ordinary goblin onahole.
"Wh-What…"
The Goblin King's expression twisted and smoothed out over and over again in rapid succession.
"Something like this. How about it?"
"This is… the personality of my kin, so cruelly treated!"
"It's just a tool, so don't get so worked up."
"Kuuuooooooh!!"
The Goblin King took the onahole I offered and fell to his knees.
"BEAUTIFUL! GORGEOUS!!"
The Demon Merchant held up the onahole I gave him like an idol and screamed.