Life without Bo-Geom in the village was simply not the same; there was nobody who understood me like she did, or smiled at me like she did, or simply took out the time to be with me when I just wanted to be in my own company. My mother wasn't that far behind on that front, but she was the sister of the Village Head and was a very busy person here. I was already having a hard time sharing her with practically everyone in the village, but then Bo-Geom had to leave and now I was on my own with my cousin Geom who was equally sad after his hyung had left and my twin sister Hana who had our father's love and affection to keep her company. Not that my father didn't love me of course…I was just a little different from him in a way that he could not fully understand me. He was a great man with great accomplishments, and he was my father, so he had every right to use me for his great plans and educate me in a way that he saw fit, but my own thoughts and ambitions were my own to dream about, and nobody could sway me from them. The trouble was that I did have a lot of thoughts about different topics all of the time; one day I wanted to be a scholar, then an attorney at law, then a simply solider to hone my craft of weaponry, then I wanted to make the weapons and become a blacksmith like my uncle Hwi was at one point in time and make a lecgay from there. I didn't know exactly what I wanted to with my life, I only knew that I did not want to just pursue one single career for the rest of my life. I was naturally very good at calligraphy, and I always passed my studies that my father put at my desk, no matter what topic it was. I had a very good memory so I was able to read off of any books at will and recite them to my father, but then what? What comes after this? What use was it being talented if I didn't know what to use it for? Who can I help? And why should I help anyone when even the people that needed help had such fickle natures? I could never forget what my cousin Geom had gone through when someone next to him accidentally got hurt and he got blamed for it so badly that he couldn't leave his father's side for weeks after that. And as for the kingdom; my mother did not sugarcoat anything to me, so I was always aware of how greedy and corrupt people were over there, to the point where they would sacrifice family members for power and wealth. And as for this village here, well it was far from perfect and the only person who seemed to agree with me was my father, although there was little that he could do without the permission of my uncle…
I was so lost in thought that I didn't even realise that my mother had snuck up behind me and instantly picked me up and coddled me into her arms to being me to the lunch table with my sister and cousin Geom. they were already playing with some new toy that my mother had gifted him to ease Geom into his studies since he was never really fond of it; he was more into training with his bow and arrows like his father whereas his hyung was already on his way to join the military with great honours and achievements. I was a lot younger than he was, but we corresponded as much as we could even though I still hadn't replied to anything that my noon Bo-Geom had sent to me. I still hadn't forgiven her for leaving my side yet and to be honest I didn't know what on earth I could say to her after all of this time… "Stop starting into space and eat your food son, and eat every single grain on your plate. Then I want you to rest a little with your cousins and sister before your father starts training you both…" "And what about me mother? Can't I train with them? I am just as smart as my brother is you know and I am also a grandchild of Seo Geom! If you can fight with a sword mother, then I should be able to as well!" "Hush girl, do you want to give you father a heart attack? You know how much he spoils you already, how can he even bare to see you get hurt?" "If I have to put up with him leaving our home all day long, then he should do this for me in return." "You and that silver tongue you have inherited from me, you always have an answer for anything and everything." My mother chucked as she began to feed me herself as much as she could in my father's absence, as he really did not like her coddling me too much. She placed me directly into her lap and fed me as I got to play with the long tresses of her hair and I could take in her heavenly scent as much as possible; if Hana was my father's favourite child, then I surely had my mother's favour as she kept hovering around me and keeping me close to her as much as possible when my father in return wasn't always hovering around her.
My father was a strong, enigmatic and recklessly impulsive man with a clear determination to exploit anyone and everyone he came across, even if he did benefit him in some way. That must have been the reason why he fell so hard for the daughter of the best swordsman of his era; along with her own stunning beauty and sharp wisdom. It was my mother who taught me my studies, who taught me how to interpret music, art and literature and even female domesticated chores like sewing and cooking so that I would never have to rely on anyone in this lifetime. And it was going to be through her guidance that I could become as independent as I could be in whatever future career that I tried to purse in the future, if only I knew what it was that I truly wanted for myself… "what are you thinking about son? Tell your mother what is on your mind?"
"Mother, will father be terribly disappointed with me if I did not follow the path that he wants me to follow?" "Hyuk, you know how your father is…he will be upset but maybe not so much if you have another clear decision in mind? Do you even know what it is that you wish to do?" "I want to go undercover; how do I help my father wipe up corruption when we do not even know who it is we are looking for? Or who will come next? And then after that?" "Oh baby, I think that you are just uncomfortable with the unknown and that is what is making you overthink so much at such a young age…" "Mother! I am not a baby anymore!" "What are you talking about? You are my baby forever!" She had her fingers in my armpits and had me in a vulnerable position of laughing too much to defend myself. Only my mother could bring my walls down with a few words and wrap me around her fingers as I quickly ate my meal before I proceeded to chase her around the room with my cousin in tow. And it wasn't long before she picked the both of us up and practically threw us out where we could just be children for a few hours before my father came home. It was a rare time for me to play like this, but of course it was my mother who made sure that I didn't grow up too quickly and savoured every milestone in my life. From the time that I could walk and talk and ride and shoot a bow and so on, she careful treasured every single item that she could pocket to keep those memories with us. It was probably a common thing that all mothers did, but my mother in particular still looked very young and outsiders often misunderstood her to be my elder sister and she was just so busy doing something or another for our village every single day. If it wasn't her turn to cook in the communal kitchens, then she was in her embroidery house working on clothes for all of us or she was helping her brother or may father or my aunts or she was teaching the village children and giving them an education from scratch. And that was how she carried herself for the entirely of my life until I was old enough to tower over her and I started keeping her company more in my father's absence. By the time I was in my teens, I had already passed the civil and military exams with flying colours and I was on my way to become a scholar in the kingdom so that I could join my cousin Chul and Bo-Geom, whom I still had not kept in touch with when she left for the village.
The only problem that I had now was to work in the palace or not; my father was for it and my mother was wholly against it. I on the other hand had already made my judgement on the matter, I was simply going to let my work speak for itself and see if the palace wished to recruit me or not. And in the meantime, unbeknownst to my parent's and uncle's family, myself and my cousin Geom found ourselves taking secret trips into the kingdom itself to keep ourselves updated on The Third Prince since my father was getting on in his old age and in no way did I want to broach such a topic of discussion with him of all people. Luckily for me, my mother kept her journey from orphanage to married life documented in diaries that she kept hidden, which Hana had accidentally stumbled across it when looking for our mother's jewellery box as per usual. I tasked her to completely transitive every single page of her diaries whilst I kept my ears open on that so-called 'Mistress Han'. I did not want my uncle's children going anywhere near her due to the complicated ties in the past and I even wanted Bo-Geom to not go anywhere near that subject for the same reason. This was the madwoman who had caused my mother in particular so much pain, and I was not going to stand for that at all. I could understand why my father had let her live even after everything that she himself had put him through, because he was the type of person who let his enemies live to wreck havoc elsewhere. But there were some patterns of very small incidents that kept happening to my close ones in the kingdom that made me very suspicious. And the fact that my own father couldn't pick up on it at his age made me very worried indeed. I had become a scholar, which was my father's dream job had his own father not used him as a tool for his own agendas, because this was my way of making our past disputes up to him. I wasn't a particularly easy child to raise for my father as I had a mind of my own that wanted to act how I pleased, but ultimately, I was going to be the one to put an end to that damned Prince myself and then after that I was going to fulfil my mother's wish, which was to put an end to Confucius laws once and for all , and even the monarchy if I could. Long have the people of this nation suffered from corruption from the very people they looked upto to serve, provide and protect them and now their days were numbered. Instead, each village and province should be watched over and provided for as my uncle did for his own people with my father's resources in tow. And if I could achieve that, then that would become my life's work solidified into history and it would change the course of this nation entirely and change it progressively for the better instead of being stuck with the typical fights for power over a throne that always caused chaos instead of peace.